Larry-The Musical

If I Could Fly

Harry was torn. Things with Louis were progressing naturally and whenever they spend time alone everything was great. In school, not so much. He understood that Louis wasn't ready to come out and he was okay with that, but why couldn't they be friends? Louis ignored him in school.

He decided to bring it up one afternoon while they were in his room, hiding from the world as usual.
"Lou? I need to ask you something." He said and turned to the side so he could look at Louis.

"Alright?" Louis smiled.

"First I just wanna say that you make me happy and I totally get that you're not ready to come out right now, and I would never push you..." Harry started off.

Louis furrowed his eyebrows.
"But?"

"I guess I'm just wondering why you have to ignore me in school? Can't we be friends?" Harry asked quietly.

Louis sighed.
"I would treat you differently and people would notice and ask questions I'm not ready to address. I'm sorry, I really am. You know I'm in love with you, right? I wouldn't be able to hide that if I interacted with you. I know it's a shit excuse."

"I understand." Harry replied and lay his head on Louis' chest and hugged him closer. "Oh, and I'm in love with you too by the way."

Even if he did understand he could:t help that it hurt a little every time Louis ignored him at school. That pain started small but built more and more as time passed.

They had been seeing each other for four months and Louis didn't seem anywhere close to being ready to come out and Harry started second-guessing pretty much everything. It seemed like Louis was content with the situation and wasn't even trying to work on his fears of coming out.

It was an impossible situation really. Harry knew that he had no saying in the matter. That was Louis' personal journey. Going into this relationship he had thought that with time Louis would come out but now he wasn't so sure about that and that was Louis' choice but it also meant that he had a choice to make. Could he continue to be Louis' secret?

He tried to talk to him about it but Louis immediately pushed him away and got irritated. Harry didn't want to make it sound like an ultimatum so he kept his feelings to himself, how their secret made him feel.

Niall noticed though. He had a one-on-one talk with him when Niall pulled him to the side.
"How are you? You seem sad."

"I'm okay, Niall. Keeping me and Louis a secret is taking a toll on me but I'm managing." Harry answered.

Niall sighed.
"I knew this would happen."

"Don't worry about it." Harry said.

Niall looked over at Louis who was surrounded by the football team. Eleanor was swooning around him as well.
"He gets to have the best of two worlds." Niall pointed out.

Harry didn't reply. There wasn't much he could say. Or was it? Before he could stop himself and think things through he walked over to the piano just standing there in the middle of the courtyard. He sat down and started to play. He opened his mouth and sang exactly how he felt.

If I could fly
I'd be comin' right back home to you
I think I might
Give up everything, just ask me to

Pay attention, I hope that you listen
'Cause I let my guard down
Right now I'm completely defenseless

He looked over at Louis and made eye contact. Louis looked worried. Harry continued the song.

For your eyes only
I'll show you my heart
For when you're lonely
And forget who you are
I'm missing half of me
When we're apart
Now you know me
For your eyes only
For your eyes only

His singing had made everyone in the courtyard stop and listen. There was no backing down now.

I've got scars
Even though they can't always be seen
And pain gets hard
But now you're here and I don't feel a thing

Pay attention, I hope that you listen
'Cause I let my guard down
Right now I'm completely defenseless

For your eyes only
I'll show you my heart
For when you're lonely
And forget who you are
I'm missing half of me
When we're apart
Now you know me
For your eyes only
For your eyes only

Niall, Lewis, and Ed had walked up to the piano. Louis on the other hand was sitting among his friends but Harry hadn't expected anything else.

I can feel your heart inside of mine

Niall, Lewis, and Ed sang back to him.

I feel it, I feel it

Happy for the support Harry continued

I've been goin' out of my mind

Niall Lewis and Ed repeated the same line.

I feel it, I feel it

Harry sang the rest of the song.

Know that I'm just wastin' time
And I hope that you don't run from me

For your eyes only
I'll show you my heart
For when you're lonely
And forget who you are
I'm missing half of me
When we're apart
Now you know me
For your eyes only

For your eyes only
I'll show you my heart
For when you're lonely
And forget who you are
I'm missing half of me
When we're apart
Now you know me
For your eyes only
For your eyes only
For your eyes only

When he finished everyone in the courtyard was silent and they were all staring at him. Harry got up and ran inside the school. Why did he just do that? It didn't change anything! He just made a complete fool out of himself in front of half the school. He could feel tears burning behind his eyes and headed to a bathroom. He locked himself in one of the stalls and cried.

Five minutes later someone entered the bathroom.
"Harry?"

Harry wiped his face and unlocked the door to the bathroom and stepped outside. He was face to face with Louis.
"What's wrong? Why did you sing such a sad song?"

"Because I'm sad!" Harry replied. His lower lip started to wobble again.

Louis reached out for him.
"What did I do?"

"Nothing and that's the problem." Harry sighed.

Louis looked confused. Harry looked down at the floor.
"I love you, Louis but I don't think I can be your secret anymore. It's too much. It just makes me sad."

Louis furrowed his eyebrows. He looked upset.
"What am I supposed to do? I can't come out just because you want me to! I can't believe you putting that pressure on me. You said you understood!"

"I do! I would never ask you to, but you have to understand me too! It's hard for me too." Harry said.

They stared at each other in silence for a moment.
"What are you saying?" Louis finally asked.

"I think we should take a step back. You know, a pause." Harry replied and bit his lower lip.

Louis looked really sad and upset.
"You're breaking up with me?"

"Yeah." Harry said and pushed past him. He didn't want to be in the same room as Louis right now. He heard him calling for him but he just kept walking. He walked out of the school and headed home where he crawled into bed and cried.