Conform or Suffer: The Darkness of Beauty

Chapter 2 Punishment

The Brownstone:

Grew-Ella stood in the den. She picked up the broken pieces of plaster on the floor and threw them away.

Her phone rang. "You didn't keep your promise," the harsh voice on the other side said. "You betrayed them!"

She trembled. "I didn't tell Quig. Everyone is lying. I never confessed that I loved him. He's one of my closest buddies, and friends protect each other from marrying dirtbags."

"Are you referring to you and me?" Chase asked.

"I don't know." Grew-Ella stared at Quig.

Chase's voice softened. "But you'll still need to be punished for telling Quig about his ex. He's above your status and always will be. You'll do what they say. I saved your life, remember. You don't need to love me, but please behave. These people will kill you."

Grew-Ella didn't hide the sarcasm from her voice. "Thanks. You're my hero."

She hung up, blocked the number, and located Quig.

He struggled with the last heavy velvet chair. She lifted the other side. Broken sunlight poured down on their beating wings, and they floated to the back of the brownstone.

They passed the garden room and the door to Grew-Ella's bedroom to the last door.

She opened the carved wooden door.

Quig placed it in the never-used servant's apartment. All the wedding chairs were stacked neatly in the storage room.

They floated around, entered the house again, grabbed a box, and set it in the hall closet.

Quig tripped over a chair built to resemble a tongue extending from the mouth of a dragon. He crashed to the floor.

Most of the wedding decorations were removed and replaced with whimsical and kinetic sculptures, but a few remained, almost mocking Quig.

Grew-Ella helped him up and spoke. "Sorry, it's Mom's latest piece. She and her students are hosting an art fair. It creeps me out."

"Can we just burn incense?" Quig asked.

"Sure." Grew-Ella walked beside him. She clung to his arm. Her engagement bracelet sparkled under the half-working fairy lights strung over their heads. Her hands tore at the lights and decaying flower garland above their heads, tossing them into a bin shaped like a paint bucket.

They walked further.

The narrow hallway covered abstract splotches and appeared to be an unfinished abstract art project, but the farther they walked, the more finished it appeared. 

Grew-Ella opened the hidden door, and they entered the prayer room. In the corner of the room stood an altar painted blue and covered in cones of colored incense, waiting to be burned.

She opened a closet and set foot-long electric candles around the four corners of the room.

Their faces were illuminated, and a painting of an angelic cherub formed in the center of the room.

"Come on, sit down." Grew-Ella unrolled a large muted-green mat that faded in parts where knees pressed into it. She lit an incense cone and knelt.

He sat down on a mat next to her and hyperventilated.

They waited for the smoke to rise, brokenness together. Ghosts danced in the colored smoke, crying with them.

If they were blessed by God and their ancestors, their late loved ones could come back reborn. But these new beings were not ghosts, zombies, or fully human, but something in between the reflected parts of themselves.

Puffs of teal-colored smoke from the desolated hearts arose upwards. Scents of frankincense and roses filled the room.

Quig said nothing at first. He lit another, trying to cover his feelings with something joyful. He knelt by her side.

The smoke muddled the aromas and the unfamiliar smell was almost putrid but, at the same time, calm.

"Someone took care of everything, and you're not going to lose your status or be lowered into the caste system," she said.

"It's not a caste system because it's flexible. I was born into wealth, and one small misstep can take it all away."

Grew-Ella nodded. "I made my own mistakes," she said.

"I...believed...you," he stuttered.

"What?" Grew-Ella asked. "Are you talking to God or me?"

"I believed you when you told me she cheated on me. It's sad, but I knew... she was cheating, and I attempted to go through with it." He clutched his knees and rocked. "I love her, but I'm not a complete idiot."

"Oh, I thought you thought I was a liar."

Quig interrupted. "I never called you a liar."

"Then why go through with a marriage to someone who despises you?" she asked. "And I'm not judging you, but I understand."

"I wish I ran, but someone Trent's involved with threatened my sisters and your mother if I didn't go through with the wedding. I don't want the people I care about to die. Are you angry at me?"

Grew-Ella sucked in the air. "No, and never. We have to sacrifice because we're adults. And sometimes we don't receive the joyful things, but the broken parts."

"Please tell me where you were. It's frightening me." He touched her face. "I kept having nightmares. I'd find your body and wake up in cold sweats."

Her eyes widened, and she knocked into an electric candle. "Ann is at least willing to allow you to escape," she said.

"Are you talking about your engagement?" he asked.

"Not exactly. Chase is as tangled as I am, and he's a mess. My soon-to-be ex is obnoxious and says a lot of awful things, but he's not as evil as people think. And he protects me."

"If you call that protection," Quig whispered.

"I can't talk anymore about him, but if I don't praise him, everything I built falls around me like the sand castles."

One of the battery-powered candles flicked off.

Grew-Ella got up and changed the battery. "It isn't really, but when you pretend to be someone's hero, maybe they'll turn into one. Sometimes people surprise you."

"He's as much a hero as my mom." Quig hyperventilated. "I lie to people about her. I tell people she's royal, but I never tell anyone she's a drug addict but your brother. But I guess shutting up is not the same as lying."

"I understand more than you realize."

He spoke again. "Mother disappeared for years on end, and I'm not sure if she's alive anymore. My mother would've demanded an invitation, but I kind of hoped she'd show up."

"Well, I'm sorry." She breathed deeply and kept a silent prayer inside her beating heart.

"It's not your fault." Quig smothered the incense. "Look, I'm being an idiot. It's not like I wasn't raised by wonderful women, but it's hard to keep up appearances that everything is okay. And I'm not okay."

A rapid knock startled them.

"I don't want to leave!" Grew-Ella yelled out.

"What is wrong?" Quig reached out for her.

Grew-Ella didn't reply, and she hugged him.

Both of them sat for a full hour without speaking.