Theirs two foxes

Chapter 13

So.....hi.....Im sorry......
I know I've been MIA for a while but I had a course to finish and shit to do and a dumpster worth of writers block, a 5 month relationship that was perfect until he revealed he didn't love me, so as it is......you can blame heartache and depression on my move out of writers block and into another period of loneliness......

Thank you to those comments too, they really did work on encouraging me to publish another chapter. So this is for you.

Luke's POV

i move myself from under him when i hear my phone go of. i don't even know anything anymore. i was so fucking happy when i felt that pull towards him...then i saw just how fucking drunk this asshole was. i slip from under him and press the pillow to his chest which he latches onto. dropping down onto the chair with tears in my eyes and my heart in my throat. i can't help but to let out a breath of a sob as i force this heart ache away. he's such a prick.....was such a prick. i brush my frindge back in an act of stress before opening my phone. i was moments away from finally being able to sleep when it buzzed.

i've been doing some late night research for him. i want to be prepared, i HAVE to be prepared. the therapist told me that he will most deffinatly reject headspace because of everything else that was spoken about and described to him but he also said that when he finally learns to accept it, things will turn out for the better. for him and for everyone around him. 

i've signed up for two online courses to do with mental health and how to support those dealing with mental health safely. and oh my god it's difficult. i don't know why i'm struggling so hard with this. but it could be to do with the fact that i've had about three hours worth of this course and NO practice. i promised myself though that once i get home i'll be so much better with studying and practicing what i'm learning. i've also signed up for a place called Crazy Sunshine which is supposed to be a day care for littles. i plan to go into the place in the morning seems as it's actually nearby but...after today i don't think leaving his side suddenly is gonna happen. it's just, if he slips into little space i want to, need to and Have to be prepared.

i look to my phone, seeing a message back from a friend of mine that said they'd be here while i was away, "daddy-" i freeze, i'm sorry, but what the fuck am i supposed to do? he's a grown ass man, OLDER THEN ME, calling me dad. why the fuck is he calling me, ME, daddy? What the fuck does this mean? "help-" my heart jumps, after the amount of rejections i've had from him knowing he's asking me, ME for help is a blissful feeling. "dAH-" He starts screaming making me jolt up, i rush over to him and pull him to my chest as he starts to hit me while screaming and crying for...his ACTUAL dad.

"Derak, baby-"

"SNOWFLAKE, MY NAME IS SNOWFLAAAAKE!" i hiss at the blatent volume of his words, "CAALLL! MEEE! SNOWFLAAAAAKE-" he Jolts upright when the door slams open, his hair is all over the place as he starts patting his face, he grips his hair and then pats his chest, looking over himself, "Why the fuck-"

"Is everything okay? What's happening?" the night nurse rushes to ask but he just sits there with a face that's convinced he's going crazy.

"it-it's okay, he was slipping in his sleep and panicked or something." i say, unsure myself. she sighs and nods.

"okay, i'll get you a glass of water but you need to keep it down." she says before leaving. 

we sit in silence for a moment before he breaths in to say something but stops, "Hay-" I look to him with a reasuring smile, "your not crazy okay?" is the first thing i say but he just looks at me with a face i've seen before.

"You must be the crazy one then, because if screaming loudly to be called snowflake isn't-" it's as if he has an internal buffer when he says the word snowflake, "oh shit-" he drags his hands down his face, "i don't get this shit. what the fuck is going on? Now i can't even say s-Snow- SHIT!" he starts breathing heavy and turning red with panic.