𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘳

25. PERPETUAL PRESENT

「—」

To Michikatsu, Sakurai supposed, she was never anything special. The only one who he had to overcome was his brother, when the three hunted and trained together. But he'd still forced his feelings of inferiority he felt towards Yoriichi onto Sakurai now. And even four hundred years later, he must have felt in Muzan's blood that he would have never been able to surpass or level his brother. That would infuriate some people for sure.

"Michikatsu-senpai, do you think my younger sister will resent me one day? Or already resents me?"

"Why should she hate what was never hers? She has never had anything taken from her, except your mother, but that couldn't be helped."

"Is that why you despise your brother? Because you were born first? But that's the curse of twins, isn't it? You are meant to be one person, one will never have the strength he was born to while the other lives. It's a heavenly principle we humans have no control over. Either you work together with a bond deeper than others, or a fierce rivalry. But one can't top the other if they're both alive. They either have a bond deeper than human understanding, or are embroiled in rivalry forever."

"Oh...?" Michikatsu seemed to grit his teeth a little. When Sakurai noticed this, she knew she hadn't given him any new ideas. It was more than likely he'd already thought of killing his brother, but also deep beneath that inferiority, he did love him. He'd just love Yoriichi more if he was weaker.

None of that seemed to ring true now, and maybe that was because he had violated the heavenly principle. Becoming a demon and outliving your brother by four hundred years wasn't going to grant the strength needed.

His hesitation gave her an opening instead. Well, given Himejima an opening. His chain broke off Kokushibo's blade. That one moment, before it would regenerate, Sakurai missed his head an only hacked off his guarding limbs.

Without opportunity, she had to back off into the range of Himejima's protection. "I was going to save this for Muzan, but it would be a waste to die here now," Himejima claimed, and stone crack marks appear on his arms.

"Inferior? You call me inferior still after all this time?" he seethed at Sakurai after their spat, then relented his posture, trying to ignore her for Himejima for a moment. "You. What are you, twenty seven? Marked ones, without exception, do not live past twenty five. You will probably die tonight. Your body and techniques will cease to exist in this world, and they have been pushed to their utmost. Don't you find that lamentable?"

"No, I don't," Himejima responded, spinning his ball idly in preparation for attack or defence. The chat allowed Sakurai to recover her breath.  "Marked ones already understand that. For example, in the demon corps  even if the mark hadn't appeared, there is no guarantee you will live tomorrow, so why would I cling to life at this point? No one becomes a hashira with such half-hearted determination. Your insult makes my blood boil."

Sakurai eyed Shinazugawa who had finished stitching up his bleeding wounds. She watched Muichiro put back together Genya's body. Then eyed the walls, the ceiling, the floor, and back to Kokishibo.

"If you become a demons, you can preserve and maintain these techniques. How can you not understand that? How foolish..."

"I don't need to understand that," Himejima snapped. "We are proud to live and die as human beings."

I was not proud to live, for many years of my life, Sakurai thought. Maybe that's why my technique has always been so reckless and unrefined. What is Breath of Life? Every technique has its master, who embody the soul of their technique. Love Breathing, Insect Breathing, Stone Breathing, Mist Breathing, Wind Breathing, Sound Breathing. Do I embody life? Have I ever really accepted this life, would I be proud to die as I am now? Even though I am marked, what does it take to be at my peak performance? Even he admitted I'm good at seeing, observing, measuring. So why can't I battle like Shinazugawa and Himejima senpai?