chai and an interview with life. (DISCONTINUED)

- the red thread of love -

**continuation of paralysed pt.2.**

We've got unfinished business,
That I wish we could finish —
Cause it hurts me so,
To leave you alone.
To have you sob on my shoulder —
And I cannot give you a pat on the back,
Cause I'll be leaving you, soon.

Do you still cry in the corner of your room?
I'm sorry I left you so alone.
But situations can't be helped —
And it seems like our destiny
Was already decided for us, by fate.

Does your best friend diss me daily?
I deserve it, too.
Do you get drunk on the weekend
And wish my life would come to an end?
I deserve it, too.
Do you wish our past would disentangle
And the poison of my absence
Finally leave you alone?

All the songs I write are about you, nowadays,
And that's such an irony —
Cause this seems like an obsessive behaviour —
And funnily, 
I was the one who left you first, in the first place.

Or have you come to hate
Every remembrance of my presence?

It's hard to erase you —
And now I'm in someone else's arms —
Kissing them and wishing
I could hold you instead.

When your parents told you I was bad news —
You should've listened —
Now look what I've done to you.
Leaving love and chasing fame —
I question the choice I made.

I find something funny
And my finger hovers over your contact —
But then I slump down —
My time for explanation is gone.
I hope your best freind is now
Helping you heal
And taking you to all those amusement parks
I never did —
Because, of course, I was too busy.

I am a heartbreaker, a murderer —
And I guess I'm good at it.
And now I'm drowning away from my problems,
Turning up the volume —
Hoping it will help me drown
In the mesmerising beauty of ignorance.

I was forever the trouble
People in school thought was cool.
You were the anchor that held me
Grounded to reality —
And I was your Alladin —
Taking you to the land of dreams
On my cursed magic carpet.

I wish the best for you —
I hope you don't remember me
And the high I brought along —
The high you got addicted to.
For with every high comes a low
That breaks you down
Forevermore.

I wish you the happiest.
And now I'm driving away from my problems —
Hoping it will save me
From the confrontation
And explanation I should've done
Instead of leaving you crying
At the airport, alone.

And this is my letter to you 
That will hopefully finish our unfinished business.
And I hope you don't remember us —
Cause baby, I have forever been a shitshow
And your heart has forever been made of gold.

I hope you don't cry forever.
I can't believe what a huge jerk I am.