Problem Solvers

Alysm

It was a strange situation and an even stranger family. What made things all the more difficult was the distance. Allison's siblings lived in New York, so staying on good terms with them involved a lot of phone calls.

They're your siblings too.

There it was again. That voice. It sounded like a woman. When it spoke, it even sounded reasonable... at times. But Five knew better. It was an auditory hallucination.

Both can be true, it said. Please, don't call me an 'it'. I'm Dolores.

"Shut up," Five said.

She did not shut up.

It was December.

The kitten calendar said it was December, anyway.

And it was alarming, because last time he'd been... awake... it had been August.

Right? Hadn't it been August?

Ben wasn't actually sure. Maybe it had been July.

It was like he'd fallen into a deeper sleep, this time.

Maybe I'm dying for real, Ben thought.

To make matters worse, he'd woken up in an unfamiliar room. It looked like a little kid's room. It was pure dumb luck that this random little kid had a kitten calendar!

Was Vanya dating someone with a kid?

"Chop chop!" Klaus's voice shouted from the other side of the door. "Time to get up, starlight!"

Fuck, Ben thought.

There was NO way he'd be able to keep his ghostly bullshit a secret from Klaus!

"Vee?" Klaus was closer to the door now. He knocked. "You seriously still asleep?"

"I'm awake!" Ben tried to make his voice sound cheerfully casual. "Give me a sec!"

"You got it," Klaus said. "Five said he needs more coffee, so Imma run out. You gonna be okay if I leave you alone with him?"

Thank fucking Christ!

"We'll be fine," Ben said. "Um, have fun!"

"Duces," Klaus said.

Ben scrambled out of the bed as soon as it sounded like Klaus had walked away and he raced around like a headless chicken looking for Vanya's clothes.

The closet was full of little girl clothes, though!

"Christ," Five said, when he found Ben upending a pile of stuffed animal unicorns. "Where's the fucking fire?"

"Sorry!" Ben said.

Five raised an eyebrow.

Ben cleared his throat and carefully said, "Um... I seem to have misplaced my clothing."

"Uh huh," Five said. "Why don't you check your luggage by the fucking door?"

"Oh," Ben said. "Silly me."

"Right," Five said. "Don't even try to bullshit me. It's not going to work today."

"Huh?"

Five scowled at him, "What, am I supposed to pretend I actually believe you couldn't find your own fucking luggage?"

Fuck!

"I'm SO sorry," Ben said. "I, um... I apologize for my bullshit."

"Uh huh," Five said. "Just tell me what you were actually looking for."