if only, once again | kamishiro rui x reader pjsk

001

Chapter 001 [Within platitudes lie undeniable truth]

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A flash of light, or perhaps what was simply anything but darkness, awoke my unconscious self.

My breaths were short and desperate; as if my body was dying, quite literally, for more air.

A saturated sight invaded my vision. Warm sun rays projected into the room, being blocked only by the restricting walls and windows of what seemed to be an infirmary.

I wouldn't know, though.

"Ah," I heard someone in the same room exclaim. "You're awake."

Awake. Infirmary. Bed. Probably the nurse. I passed out, then?

She took her time to walk over.

The moments of suffocation I felt as her heels clicked on the ground, each step taking longer than one second passes by, made me realise yet again; this is exactly why I hate the infirmary.

Her face was too high up and too angled for me to see properly, but her expression was giving me the impression that she woke up every morning feeling suicidal.

"You have a mild case of anemia. No idea where it came from since you don't have past medical records."

Perhaps it's the time travel jet lag. Oops, my bad!

"Call your parents with your phone and get them to bring you home or possibly a hospital." saying this with a tone that reeked of boredom.

Finding myself in a slight stupor for reasons I couldn't quite get a hold of, I forced my arm to reach out to the seemingly distant phone on the small table to my right. Today is not my day...Wait, does "today" count as the same day as the one before I was transported back in time? I groaned, realizing that the phone was clearly unreachable, as I'd managed to think about the most unnecessary thing before I could touch it.

Then, I blinked as a reflexive response to my phone disappearing to the side at the speed of light.

"Here." I knew that voice. The tone that I'd long associated with my life motto to 'hear Rui speak happily to me'.

The tone of solemnity-- of 'I don't want this.'

Though I was scared of what I was going to see, I turned my head anyway.

Purple... yeah, that's my crush. The guy I spent a year (perhaps a little less than 8304 hours) dreaming, preparing and changing myself for? He was holding my phone towards me while donning an unsettled expression on his radiant though slightly unfamiliar face.

"If you're feeling sick, please say it before you faint!" the sudden exclaimation of unsatisfaction with my actions made me jerk in surprise.

I snatched my phone from his hands.

So in the end, all it took was for me to be ill for him to look at me in the face without my feeling like I was being castigated by his hateful, narrowed eyes.

"..." I felt some hesitation in my heart. But as my previous actions suggest; hesitation only makes my decisions even more reinforced in will.

Taking a whiff of fresh air in, I prepared for the lack thereof which would follow.

"...I think you can leave now, senior."

Why did I feel so painful saying this one line? He made me feel so much worse back then.

I have no reason to keep him here; I am justified in being slightly mean in response to his concern, because I don't need it.

...Right?

I have no reason to like him or try to get close to him anymore.

I have been given a new chance at changing everything; it's an opportunity to regain back the time I lost and use my experiences for the better--

to get retribution.

...Right?

[“As they say, if you want to enjoy life, dance in the middle of the ballroom-- if you want to enjoy love, dance with a man-- if you seek none, then die.”]

My head suddenly rang.
Then, almost like they came in a pair, I felt a drop of sweat slide down my forehead in the air of tension.

As if they were droplets of rain falling from the sky, I heard footsteps from the side of the room inch closer-- almost as if they were alarming me of something.

"What's going on?" the nurse sounded like one should, finally.

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Chapter 001 END

if u liked this giv me some engagement ykyk i need em 😍💕 also tysm to those who did comment and check this out from just for you!! i really enjoy reading comments about stuff i personally wrote and it feels kinda odd like bro am i hallucinating all this????

anw sorry for the short chapter! (im prob not that sorry LMAO) i would aim for around 1k words per chapter, but hey im no god and i aint feel like writing more today but idw leave this story chapter 1less (⁠｡⁠•́⁠︿⁠•̀⁠｡⁠)

also u can prob figure out what title means w some detective work but if u do god damn u shld go work as a PI yk???

buh bye!! ch 2 will be out when i finish paying my hospital bills
have a good one
-ffey