I'm here.

Change of Heart

- Morticia -

I reasoned with myself that it wouldn't be a problem if we continued to work on the case together. Our work would benefit the school, which would make her happy. The problem was that she couldn't believe that our meeting was about anything more than business. I would need to keep us focused. I could do that.

Or maybe I couldn't.

We were back in the library the next night, and I was using every ounce of self-control that I had to stay on track. We were here to work. Only to work. That was it. Nothing more.

I stuck to my resolve for all of about thirty minutes. I made the mistake of looking up as he showed me a diagram in one of the books we were searching through. He made a silly face at me, and I laughed harder than I think I had ever laughed before. We abandoned our work almost immediately. I forgot all of my fear and reasons why this wasn't allowed to happen.

"Say," Gomez suggested. "Would you like to go somewhere this weekend? Somewhere outside the castle, I mean. I know a couple of nice places that I think you'd really like!"

Reality came crashing down around me.

"N-no," I managed to say.

"No?" he asked, confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that I can't go with you this weekend," I answered. I tried to speak clearly and confidently, but my words were coming out as whispers.

"Oh," he replied, clearly disappointed. "Next weekend?"

"No," I repeated, not looking at him.

He paused. I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I was certain that I had hurt his feelings.

"Well then," he continued, back to his usual chipper self. "We'll just have to do something on school grounds!"

I finally looked up, shocked by how quickly he had accepted what I told him. I expected him to argue or become angry. Instead, he took what I said in stride. I smiled, and we continued talking until the library closed.

He didn't bring it up again, until that Saturday when he met me outside my classroom. I had just finished feeding my plants (cold yak this time) and was heading back to my quarters to read.

"Morticia," he said, stopping me. He wore his normal smile that melted all my worries away.

"Yes, Gomez?" I answered, curious. We weren't planning to see one another until tonight in the library. I had promised to bring my notes from a study that I conducted on African Stranglers last year. Perhaps that's what he was inquiring after.

"I haven't found my notes yet if that's what you're wondering. But, I do think I'll be able to gather them before I meet tonight," I added.

"Oh, I'm not worried about that," he replied. "I don't think that we should work together tonight."

My heart sank. It made sense that such a popular and well-liked person would want to do something else with his Saturday night, but I had been looking forward to seeing him tonight.

"I understand," I spoke quietly. "I'm sure that you have many other demands on your time, especially on the weekend."

"No, no Morticia," he stopped me, with a huge smile on his face. "You misunderstand me. What I meant to say was that I think the two of us should go somewhere else tonight. On castle grounds of course."

My eyes widened. That wasn't what I was expecting him to say at all.

"Well?" he asked. "How does that sound to you?"

I felt so many feelings at the same time. Relief that he still wanted to see me tonight. Excitement at the possibility of doing something different. Curiosity surrounding what plans he could have come up with. Fear that we were growing too close. Affection toward him that I didn't know what to do with.

In the end, I gave in and nodded my head. He beamed, his smile somehow growing even wider. I blushed.

"We'll walk together after dinner, then!" he announced, with conviction.

"No!" I exclaimed, startling him. "I mean, let's meet somewhere else and walk from there, not the dining hall."

She was sure to notice if we left the dining hall together.

"Oh?" he was confused by my response. "As you wish. Let's meet at the library then, and we'll walk from there."

I breathed a sigh of relief and smiled.

"That sounds lovely," I breathed.

"I'll see you then," he bowed and walked away. It didn't take long before a group of teachers caught up to him and they started chatting.

I couldn't seem to stop smiling. I was so happy that I was going to see him 

All of my plans and intentions to keep our relationship professional had flown out the window. I wanted to run to him with reckless abandon. I no longer cared about the consequences. I wanted as much of him as I could have.

I was late to dinner because I had lost track of time fixing my appearance in my room. I had one cracked mirror that someone else hadn't wanted. They were planning to throw it away. I actually liked it better after it was cracked, and asked them if I could keep it.

I laid out my entire wardrobe, trying to pick out my nicest outfit. I didn't have much to work with. All of my clothes were too large, and the colors looked dreadful on me. They were ghastly shades of faded pink, purple, yellow, and brown. I closed my eyes and imagined myself in an elegant ensemble with dark colors. It was solid black and drew attention to my curves in the perfect way. I wouldn't mind one in a deep purple, or maybe a forest green. I thought I would probably look good in blood red as well. 

I opened my eyes and remembered that I didn't own any of those colors. I held up two dresses and chose the least pink of the two. This one was originally yellow but had faded to a sickly brown. I slipped it on and moved onto my hair. I took it out of the normal tight braid and brushed my fingers through it. The braid had left some nice waves that I thought were quite attractive. I decided not to put it up again. I couldn't help my clothes, but I believed that my hair was beautiful.

When I finally made it to the dining hall, everyone else was already eating. I picked up my food and sat down in my usual seat. I scanned the crowd for Gomez and found him looking at me. I smiled at him, and he kept staring at me. I blushed, and looked away, embarrassed. I ate my dinner in silence, not daring to look at him again.

When I arrived at the library, he was already there. He offered me his arm. I hesitated, but then took it, and we walked through the halls together.