The Love That Wasn't Enough | PEDRI

27

I'm moving my fork slowly, pushing the food on my plate around. I'm not really listening to my family talking. I can't stop thinking about what happened with Sophia. I keep asking myself, "What if Gavi didn't show up? Would Sophia and I have kissed?" I didn't notice the room got quiet. When I look up, everyone is staring at me.

"Is something wrong?" My mom asks, I force a smile on my face not wanting them to worry. "Don't worry, Mom, just a lot going on with the team." I lie hoping she will believe it.

She nods, and they start talking about the restaurant. I take a deep breath, lean back in my chair, and try to make the day better. The sound of plates and forks clinking becomes a background noise.

I shift my focus back to the present, trying to join the conversation. I'm trying hard to be part of the talk, pushing away the complicated thoughts. As we talk and laugh together, it feels good to share these moments with my family. It eases the heavy feelings inside me, at least for a little while.

Later that evening, I find myself at my desk, fixated on my phone screen, contemplating whether to reach out to Sophia, her phone number displayed before me. Uncertain about the right moment, I'm interrupted by a knock on my door, prompting me to shift my attention away and power down my phone.

"Come in," I say, witnessing my brother entering my room and going to my bed. "So, what's really going on?" He asks.

"What do you mean?" I ask, trying to shift the focus. But I feel like he knows something. I sense that he's onto something. My brother really understands me, especially when I'm not honest. He's good at seeing through things and picking up on what I might be trying to hide.

"Cut the crap, Pedri. I know you lied during dinner." He says, cutting straight to the point.

Frustration escapes me in a groan as I rake my fingers through my hair. Bracing myself, "Fine, but before you launch into a lecture, I need to explain everything." I warn him.

"Okay," he says, anticipation etched on his face. Drawing a deep breath, I shut my eyes briefly, gathering the courage to disclose, "Me and Sophia almost kissed." I say, slowly reopening my eyes, I observe him frozen in disbelief, speechless in response to my revelation. The weight of the unspoken hangs in the air, and I brace myself for his reaction, fully aware that what I've just said may not elicit the most favorable response.

"You two almost what?" he asks, causing me to reconsider my life choices.

"We almost kissed," I admit quietly. He shakes his head, his disappointment evident. "That's Nailea's best friend, Pedri," he reminds me, as if I need to hear it again.

"I know, that's why I'm beating myself up about it," I confess. The situation is a complete mess.

"But that's not all," I add, catching his attention again. "Jesus Christ, there's more?!" he exclaims, and I nod in response. "Gavi walked in on us," I reveal, and his eyes widen.

"Pedri, what the hell," he says, grabbing a pillow and throwing it at me. I manage to dodge the pillow. "He isn't talking to me at all; he's been avoiding me since," I explain, sharing the complications with Gavi, the conversation I had with Pablo, and how Sophia left during the second half. As I finish recounting everything, the room falls into a heavy silence.

He remains silent, absorbing everything, and I understand - it's a lot to take in. "I don't know what to do," I admit, feeling the weight of guilt once again. Looking up at me, he takes a deep breath and shakes his head. "I don't know what to tell you," he responds. His expression is a mix of concern and confusion.

"Do you like Sophia?" he suddenly asks, making me snap my head towards his direction.

"No, why would you even ask that?!" I quickly respond. I've never seen Sophia as anything more than Nailea's best friend.

"Because someone who claims not to like or find a person attractive wouldn't be in the situation you are in right now," he says, each word hitting me with a sense of realization.

"It didn't mean anything," I murmur in an attempt to downplay the significance.

"Yeah, maybe for you it doesn't, but what if it does for her?" he counters. The weight of his words settles in, and I find myself grappling with the potential consequences of my actions.

"Look, all I can say is you've got to talk to both Gavi and Sophia, you have to fix things," he advises, rising from my bed.

"As for Nailea, I don't know, Pedri," he says, scratching the back of his head. "If you really mean what you said about not liking Sophia, then maybe it is truly nothing, but I hope that, for your sake, it is," he concludes, heading to the door and leaving my room. The echoes of his words linger as I ponder the tangled mess I find myself in.