D0NT H0LD IT AGAINST US - PROXIES x GN! READER

001

The sun was setting over the horizon on the warm summer day, the sky a beautiful orange as it slowly got darker. The view was breathtaking from where you and your boyfriend had set up camp on the tall cliff. He had already set up the fire, you had helped gather dry twigs and such for the fuel, and you two shared a quiet conversation as you roasted marshmallows.

It was the one-year anniversary of you and Callum's relationship. Your mind was clouded in memories of the year you had spent with him, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Even though you think you should love him, though, it was like something was stopping you from trusting him completely. You ignored your anxious worries, playing them off to yourself as stupid intrusive thoughts, and filed them away with all of your other ones.

Going camping was his idea, you never really enjoyed it yourself. Camping meant lots of bugs and living without the usual electronic pleasures you had made so important to your day-to-day life. He had talked you into it, though, sharing stories of the scenery and wildlife he saw camping when he was younger. You hadn't regretted it in the end, and even though your legs were aching from the long hike, this outing had boosted your spirits. The scenery filled you with a sense of calm you hadn't known in a while.

You still weren't excited about sleeping in the uncomfortable tent, though.

The sun was now fully set as you began enjoying your marshmallows, the crickets already starting up as stars revealed themselves to you in the comfort of the dark sky. Callum turned to you, his deep blue eyes filled with warmth, the fire casting an orange glow on his face. "Come here." he stands slowly, holding out a calloused hand for you to take. He helps you stand and leads you slowly over to the edge of the cliff, allowing you to lean some of your weight on him. The two of you look over the acres of forest hundreds of meters below the cliff you two were standing on top of. You could hear the rushing of water from the river below you, the water of which was so clear you could see the fish following the flow of the stream.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" You looked over at Callum, inspecting his side profile. You smiled.

"I much prefer looking at you." You reply, leaning your head on his shoulder. He looked over at you, meeting your eyes. His seemed colder now that the fire wasn't casting its light upon them. Your smile fell. "Is something wrong, Callum?" You asked, straightening up. He frowned lightly, expression tightening.

"I need to talk to you about something." Callum confesses. You lean away from his side-embrace, turning your body towards his. Your hands instinctively rest on the sides of his arms. You're filled with concern and fear, but try not to show it. Whatever he needs to talk about with you, it's obviously important. You try to ignore as your already-worn legs begin aching a bit louder now at the longer duration of standing.

"Please, tell me. You know I'm always here for you." You push him, curious to whatever was gnawing away at his consciousness as the awareness of its presence was gnawing away at yours. He sighs, his expression growing colder. You released your hold on his arms.

"Yes, I'm well aware, I'm very thankful for everything you've done for me." He began. You wondered if he was breaking up with you. Would he really do that on the first night of a three-day trip, though? You anxiously toyed with the strings of your dusty green jacket. "But I have to admit to you something important." He took a small step closer grasping the sides of your face in his hands. They were warm compared to the swiftly cooling air. "I never loved you."

Your eyes widened, had you heard him correctly? "What." You said more as a statement than as a question. "What do you mean? Callum?" Your eyes searched his face for an answer. Was he making a cruel joke on you? What was going on? You felt lost. His hands fell away from your face, the cool air working to dissipate any of the body heat he left in his trace.