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xxi. I'm Not Okay
THE SOFT SOUNDS OF RAIN made Juliette Brown's muscles relax. The soothing noises made her eyes lock shut and her lips curl upwards. It made her forget about all of her problems. Made her forget about social media, her illness, love, and overwhelming feelings.
The only thing that hurt Juliette was the fact that her loved ones were suffering. She couldn't live with the fact that she was hurting everybody near her for attention. It wasn't fair. It never would be fair.
Juliette currently sat on cobblestones, looking up at the raining sky. She was the only one home at the moment, so she decided to stay outside.
Her clothes began to cling to her body, sending chills down her spine. The lightning in the sky made Juliette's eyes widen for a quick moment, before she quickly stood up.
Rain poured down onto Juliette, red hair now soaking wet. She didn't care anymore. She was furious.
"Why?" Juliette spoke, holding back her tears. "Why me?" She repeated, looking up at the sky. "I'm only eighteen!" She shouted, voice cracking.
She momentarily paused. "I'm still a kid!" Juliette sobbed, voice shaking every time she spoke. "Please," She sobbed out, knees shaking. Her hands shook as she brought them to her mouth, masking her tears. "Please!" She repeated, growing more desperate.
She couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't pretend to feel happiness, when all she felt was despair. Juliette couldn't pretend to be happy, not even for the people she loved most.
As Juliette looked up at the sky, the rain began to pour down harder. Many sobs left her lips as she sat back down, burying her face in her knees. "Please." She breathed out, hiding her face.
"Juliette?" A voice said, trying their hardest to gather Juliette's attention. "Jules, are you okay?" Madison Parker rasped out, rushing to Juliette.
"Madi," Juliette shakily spoke, head falling against Madison's shoulder. "I'm so scared, Mads."
Madison let out a quiet breath, before wrapping an arm around Juliette's body. Madison was never lost for words, but she suddenly couldn't speak. "You're okay." She tried, but Juliette quickly shook her head.
"Stop saying that." Juliette spoke, voice cracking. "Why is everybody telling me that?" Juliette stressed, running a hand through her damp hair. She quickly stood up, indicating that she was going to start shouting.
