Ostensible | SS

009.

excuse any mistakes

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Tassoni was currently in her Tuesday morning class. The class ended in 15 minutes and she had been trying to keep the fact that Shilo said he loved her at the back of her mind since Sunday. 

With her insecurities she couldn't help but to think that he only said it because they were having sex. Which made her regret doing anything at all. A million thoughts were running through her head. What if he thought she was a hoe? Who gets raped and has sex weeks later? 

She was very grateful when the clock struck 10 o'clock because her class was now over meaning she could get the errands she had plan done today. 

It was maintenance week for Tassoni. She stopped getting her hair,nails, and lashes done a while ago but felt like it was time to get back into her old habits especially since they made her feel good. She hadn't dressed up since the party and she didn't realize how much taking time to look good really made her feel good. 

Her hair appointment was at 11 o'clock giving her just enough time to stop and grab something to eat. Deciding to go to the wing place that Shilo took her before she began to drive in that direction. 

Stepping out of her car Tassoni made sure to grab her purse and lock the doors. Walking through the doors she was instantly greeted by Gary. 

"Hey young lady, what can I do for you?" 

"Hey Gary, can I get a 12 piece combo all flats with hot and lemon pepper. And for the drink can I have a mango lemonade." She said reciting her order. 

"Coming right up." Tassoni pulled her wallet from her purse getting ready to pay but was stopped. "It's on the house pretty lady." He told her prompting Tassoni to put her wallet back into her purse. 

Taking a seat at a near by table Tassoni waited for her order number to be called out. In the mean time she scrolled on her instagram. She saw the text from Shilo but wasn't in a rush to reply until she figured out what how she is feeling. 

Hearing her number being called broke her attention from her phone. Walking up to the counter she grabbed her order deciding she would eat on the way to her appointment. 

"Tell Shilo Hi for me." Gary spoke to her before she walked off. 

"I will, thank you." She replied beginning to walk away and out the door making her way to her car. 

Unlocking the door and getting in she began to unwrap her food and started to eat a little. Then starting her car and making her way to her hairstylist. 

Finally making it to her appointment, Tassoni threw her trash from her food away in the nearby garbage can. Walking through the doors of the shop she made her way to the stylist's suite. 

"Hey girl." Tassoni smiled greeting her hairstylist while walking over to the chair and sitting in it. 

"Hey gorgeous, is the picture you sent me still what you want?" She questioned beginning to part Tassoni's hair. 

"Yes ma'am." 

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Looking at her freshly done hair in her bathroom mirror Tassoni decided to snap a quick picture. In the middle of her taking her pictures she received a call Facetime call from Shilo.  

"You avoiding me?" Shilo instantly questioned once the call connected. "Let me see your face it's called face time for a reason." he added. 

Tassoni put her face in the camera. "I'm not ignoring you. I was getting my maintenance done." 

"So you ain't been on your phone all day?" He questioned making Tassoni twist her lips to the side not sure how to respond. "Exactly." he said hanging up the phone not allowing her to get any words out. 

Deciding to give him some time to cool off. She decided to do her homework in the meantime to get ahead on her classes so she could relax during finals time. 

Opening up her laptop and going to look at her assignments for the rest of the year she heard a knock on her door as soon as she opened the first one. 

Setting her laptop to the side she rose from her bed and footed her way down stairs and to the front door. Looking out of the peephole she noticed Shilo standing outside of the door. Opening the door she stood to the side and let him come in. 

Waiting on her to close and lock the door he instantly wrapped his hands around her. Even though it had only been two days he missed her so much. 

Tassoni moved out of his arms. "What are you doing here?" She asked harsher than she intended. 

"You weren't talking to me I'm tryna make sure I didn't do anything wrong. Did I make you uncomfortable?" 

"No, I'm just not ready for all of that." She explained telling half the truth. 

"Ready for all of what? You acting like I asked you to marry me." He retaliated. 

"Can you just respect what I'm saying. You can't love me what the fuck Shilo. We barely know each other. Let up and stop acting like a pussy." 

"You so used to that toxic ass nigga you can't accept the fact that i'm actually tryna love you. It's not the fact that I can't love you, you don't love yourself enough to believe that I could." Shilo said not meaning to be harsh and trying not to actually show how much her words actually hurt him. 

"Don't ever try to throw that shit in my face get out just get the fuck out. You got what you wanted so leave."

"Got what I wanted? I didn't even initiate that. I'm just tryna be here for you. Why is it so hard for you to understand that?" Shilo was trying very hard no to raise his voice knowing his father didn't raise him like that. 

"I don't need you here! I never once asked you to be captain save a hoe. You did that all on your own." Tassoni said throwing her arms in the air obviously frustrated about the situation. 

"You got it Tassoni." And with that Shilo walked out of the door. 

Tassoni let them tears flow down her face once the door closed. She didn't even understand why she said all of that knwoing that she didn't mean it. But maybe Shilo was right, maybe she didn't love her self enough to believe that he could love her. 

hi guyssss, i'm backkkk. finals are finally over so hopefully I can update quicker and get to the end of this book. see you next update. 💋