"I-I just... I meant..." I stammered and buried my face in my hands. "I'm an idiot."
"What do you mean?" Harry asked, letting the boy down.
"Nothing." I chewed my bottom lip.
"I don't think it's nothing. You're so nervous." He paused for a while before speaking again. "What is it?"
"Nothing!" I repeated. Zayn looked at us in confusion.
Harry watched me sharply before grabbing my arm. He pulled me out of the snack room as the teachers looked on with curiosity. "Don't pull me!" I told him, jerking away. But his grip tightened and my back touched the wall of the corridor.
"What were you talking about?" He questioned as his glowing green orbs stared me down.
I pursed my lips and crossed my arms, refusing to give in. He leaned in closer and asked me once more. "Helena," He breathed. "What were you talking about just now?"
I slowly parted my lips to speak. "I'm not even sure."
"Just tell me." He demanded.
"I think Polly's pregnant." I quickly told him and shut my eyes.
I waited for his reaction... but he didn't utter a single word. Puzzled by his silence, I cracked my eyes open. I saw him grinning.
"Wha- why are you smiling?" I asked. Then he started to laugh. Afraid that he might've gone mad, I lightly pushed him away from me.
His large hands captivated my littler ones. He held onto them tight as he continued to smile. "You think I'm the father?"
"Well... you guys did date." I shrugged.
"Doesn't mean we had sex." He said bluntly.
After hearing those words, suddenly, it felt as if a massive weight had been lifted off my chest. I didn't feel constricted and out of breath anymore. I lit up. "So... you can't be the dad?"
He let out a small laugh. "Well sex is the only natural way to get someone pregnant... unless you know some other method." His dimples were pronounced as he smirked at me.
I lightly nudged him in the arm before joining in on the laughter.
_____________________________
The surface of the bed fluctuated when I threw my weight on it. I exhaled deeply as I tore the sticky name tag off my paint smothered blouse. The children had drawn all sorts of doodles along my arms. I hoped it wasn't in permanent ink.
I was exhausted and my eyes felt heavy. They were gradually shutting themselves. I was about to drift off into a dream when a loud thud startled me. I realized someone had shut the entrance door with a huge force.
I was instantly wide awake when loud noises of bickering followed. It sounded like my parents. I rushed over to the door and pressed my ear against it.
"Joanne, this is the tragic truth. I can no longer stand you." My father exclaimed. "I tried. I tried so many times but you aren't doing anything on your part. You don't even try."
"You know how much I try, Robert! It's you who's never at home! Your own daughter doesn't know you anymore." My mother retorted.
"You never appreciate my efforts. You never appreciate anything and you take things for granted!" He bawled back.
There was a long pause before my mother spoke again with a quieter voice. "Well, that's it then. We're through."
My breath hitched as I covered my mouth with my hands. I couldn't believe what I just heard. My back slid down the door before I rested on the floor. Completely devastated, I brought my knees up to my chin and began to cry.
My parents promised that they would strive to make things work. My father even moved back in... what happened? I was lost and clueless. I suddenly became disoriented. Despite whatever they did, my parents still meant the world to me.
I heard quick footsteps outside before the door shook. "Helena?" I heard my father call. The knob twisted and he attempted to open the door but my back was strongly pressed against it.
"Helena dear, let me in please." He pleaded. I stood up and stepped away from the door, wiping the tears with the sleeve of my sweater.
The door creaked as my father made his way in. His puffy cheeks were flushed and he nervously played with his fingers. "W-When did you get back home? We were supposed to pick you up from the preschool."
"A friend walked me home." I told him, pretending to be obtuse to what I'd heard downstairs.
He sighed noticing my anguished tears. "You heard?"
I bit my lip, controlling my tears. "Honey..." He extended his arms to welcome me into his embrace but I backed away in refusal.
"How could you do this, dad?" I blurted.
"It's not like that. We were going to tell you in a proper way. We didn't intend for this to hap-"
"You know, I used to think some parents were so selfish doing whatever they wanted to like getting a divorce without even thinking about the impact it would have on their children." I said in between sobs. "I didn't expect you guys to be like that."
"Helena," My mother called as she entered the room. "Listen, sometimes things don't work out and-"
"Whatever." I cut her off, grabbing my bag and heading out the door.
______________________
I sat cross-armed on a tweaky timbered bench as I carefully watched a couple sitting right across me. A grubby pavement divided me from them. Enraged and at the same time sorrowful, I decided to calm myself down by resting at a park.
The couple was old, I assumed they were about seventy atleast. I had almost lost all my faith in love until I saw them. The man had his weak arm around his white-haired wife as they spoke to each other quietly. They giggled every few minutes and they looked so serene and happy that I yearned to know what they were whispering about.
They soon stood up shakily and walked away hand in hand with their walking sticks. They never once stopped looking at each other.
I saw true love.
I wanted that so badly. But the closest thing to love - atleast I think it is - that I've ever felt was when I was with Harry. There... I said it.
But I wouldn't call it love. It was close to it though, I could tell. It just felt incredibly odd whenever I was around him. I constantly got this weird sensation in my stomach whenever he cracked a joke or smiled at me. It all started when he kissed me in his room the last time.
I was such a loser. The guy was merely playing around with me. I felt so ashamed to be thinking about him like that. What's worse was that I was still dating his brother.
"Baby." I felt a strong squeeze on my shoulder. I turned around to see Daniel flashing a smile at me. "Your Facebook status said you'd be here."
"Hey, Danny." I sniffed and shot him back a smile.
"Your eyes are red." He commented as he sat beside me on the creaky bench. "What's wrong?"
I let out a heavy sigh. "Well," I paused. "Apparently my parents are getting divorced. As soon as possible."
He looked at me sympathetically as he grasped onto my hand. "I thought things were working out."
"Obviously not."
"I'm so sorry." He told me and rested his forehead on my shoulder.
It was a mere few minutes before I felt Daniel exhale deeply against the woolen material of my sweater. "Daniel? Are you okay?" I asked. It took me a while to realize he was crying.
"Daniel? What's wrong? I'm fine, don't worry about me." I assured him, surprised by his sudden meltdown.
He pulled away and I cupped his face in my hands. "It's not that..." He trailed off.
