The pretty boy from the song (Boyxboy)

Chapter 28: Moms and dads and boyfriends and I love you's

Parker's perspective
Sam fell asleep an hour ago. It's 6 in the morning now and I still haven't had any sleep. I'm just not tired, I'm still processing things. I'm still trying to figure out how this is real, why he likes me and why I deserve him. I'm working on that, I'm trying to see what he sees. It's just hard to do so. I go sit outside with a cup of coffee, when my mom comes out. She smiles at me. "Hey honey, couldn't sleep either huh?"
I smile at her. "No. Sam is snoring so loud."
My mom laughs. "Well, you're lucky. Imagine having that sound multiplied by 6 more people and then you have your grandpa." I chuckle.
"Right, sorry."
"That's okay, I'm not going to let Sam sleep with our noisy family, now am I? That's for another time." She stares at the ocean view in front of us. My uncle lives close to the beach, I love that so much. It's the only one close to us.

"Another time?"
"Well, you should bring him again next time, if you want."
We don't say anything.
"So, did Sam have a good time?"
"He did. Everyone was so nice to him and he was really enjoying everyones company."
"Your uncle really likes him you know."
I smile at that. "I know. They've already turned against me."
She chuckles. "I like him too, he's very sweet."
"Yeah, me too, he's so awesome. I'm so glad he came with, he's such a genuinly kind person and I-... Well..." I cut myself off, before I start rambling. My cheeks heat up just thinking about it. I look at the sea, but I can see my mom in the corner of my eyes.
She smiles at me, and I just know she knows. I wonder if she always knew.
She's staring at the ocean again.

"Mom?"
I look at her, she looks at me.
"Yeah?"
"Well I'm... I don't really know if it's okay and I don't really know how you feel about it but... Sam is my boyfriend. I'm- I'm bisexual." It just spills out.
My mom smiles, hugging me instantly.
" Oh- Ofcourse that's okay! That's more than okay! Honey, you're more than enough. You know you're my baby, right?"
I start crying uncontrollably, because I didn't realise I said it and it just weighed off my shoulders. She holds me tightly.

"That's okay honey, that's okay. God, I'm so sorry that you felt like you had to hide that beautiful part of your life... I remember when you were little, do you remember that time? You we're such a tiny guy, such a tiny little perfect guy. And I told you that I would always love you, no matter who you grew up to be. Even if you joined a cult."
I chuckle-cry. I can't help it. "Jesus christ mom, what is it with your side of the family and cults?"
She throws her hands up in defense.
"Hey, I'm just saying. Because your dad's aunt Sally joined this cult and it was this whole thing-"
I shake my head. "God, did everyone know this except for me?"
She shrugs. "Look, my point is, I love you. So much. And I told you then and I've told you now. Remember when I sat you down at the kitchen table and told you that I loved you no matter what? Even if you'd love someone that wasn't a princess but a prince?"
I nod. "Yeah, I was so little then."
"And I mean it. You're my world and I'd do anything for you. I love you so much."
"I love you too, so much. I'm sorry." I start crying again, I don't think I've ever cried this much. It's both terrifying and freeing.

She puts a hand on my cheek. "Don't ever say that. That's more than okay. This is your story and you should cry as much as you want. I love you. And I'm glad it's Sam."She hugs me tightly.
"It's not Sam."
"What?" Her arms loosen for a bit, looking at me in shock.
"I'm joking."
She softly pushes me, her eyes are tearing up. "God, you're terrible."
I'm still crying and smiling at the same time, it's weird. I pause for a moment. "What if I ruin this? I've been so horrible to him in the past and I feel like I'm just the most terrible person on this planet. What if I ruin him, mom? What if I'm so broken that I screw this up and what if I'm evil? What I'm just like... Him? Like dad?" I want to say more, but she shakes her head.

"You're not, I'm so sorry that you even think that... You're nothing like him, you hear me? Nothing. I know you're scared about turning into him, you always have. But you won't. Look- I can only imagine how hard these past years have been, and I'm so sorry that you felt this way. I should've been there more and-"
"Mom, it's not your f-"
"No, please let me finish. I'm sorry that happened to you. But you've been trying so hard and you've been learning alot about yourself, you're going to be fine. You both are. Relationships are hard, there will be good days and bad days, but everything will be okay as long as you keep talking. I promise you honey, you'll be okay. I'm so proud of you."