Chapter 10

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By a blink of an eye, it's December and I'm still in Korea. I haven't gone back and I'm not sure when I will. I watched the first snow fall with Chan from the roof top of where we rest of heads. Not the safest but the roof is pretty flat. Chan told me to make a wish.

"What did you wish for?"

"I can't tell you confidential information or it won't come true. As we're on the topic, I'm sure you can tell me, Christopher."

"Oh no, I'm sorry. We're on the boat. My lips are sealed." We laugh together as we're tucked underneath a thick blanket together. 

My wish. My wish is that I was his and he was mine.

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As the holidays drew closer, the boys beside Chan were going to leave and reside with their families. Han's last day before he left us was today. As he was out with Lee Know, I decided to bake a cake. One thing that they might not be aware of, but I was a baker back where I lived. Not an official baker but I got skills here and there. Han loves cheesecake and chocolate cake. Now, I don't have any recipes on cheesecakes nor am I a fan, but I do have one for a very moist chocolate cake. I'll surprise him with it.

I make the cake. Changbin and Hyunjin are still here. I'll keep the cake hidden until Han comes back. Whether he decides to share or not is fully dependent on him.

A few hours go past, and I'm cuddled up on the couch watching T.V. Han has finally arrived.

"HAN!" 

"Wow! You're excited to see me."

"I made a cake! For you!"

"For me, ha, thanks."

"It's chocolate with a chocolate ganache."

"Oh, chocolate. My favorite!"

"I know you're leaving tomorrow, and I was wondering if you would like to eat this with the boys."

"Ah, yes, that's a great idea." We called the others, and they gathered around. We ate the cake and expressed our gratitude. It was like we had been together since day one of our lives. We laughed and yelled. Emotions all over the place but we allowed ourselves to be vulnerable.

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Christmas, a time to rejoice and be in the warm embrace of family. Felix was left at the house alone and was going to come over here. It's just me and Chan on this Christmas Eve until Felix gets here. 

Chan rests his head on my lap as we sat on the couch. I start running my fingers through his hair. Massaging his scalp and scratching here and there. I start rubbing his ears and lightly gliding my fingers across his face. 

"That makes my body shiver", he says as his eyes remain close. I laugh and tell him that my friend always wanted me to glide my fingers across their arm.

He turns his head and looks up at me. I look down as I hold his head. 

"You're beautiful." He tells me and doesn't look away. He leans up and I turn my head. He's sitting up beside me. His eyes don't leave my face.

"I want to kiss you." I look back at him. His hand slowly reaches for my face. His body leans within mine. Our breathing synchronizes. He closes his eyes and I give in. My eyes close and our lips meet. I feel the warmth from his lips. I always wanted to kiss him but never knew how desperately he wanted me. Us being alone only allowed him more control in what he can do without it being shared. 

Knocking started at the door. 

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