In Retrospect - Jikook

Chapter Nine: Strings

Waking up felt violent. For the past six years, Park Jimin woke up apathetically. Back then, getting up felt the same as being drugged. Hazy and distant, but aware enough of his movements to watch his life blur around him. This, waking up next to Jungkook, felt like being electrocuted in comparison. A violent rush of joy sparked through Jimin's system realizing Jungkook had stayed the night. Not just a feeling of security, but actual joy.

The sun was slicing through Jimin's window, draping over Jungkook's body and the rustled sheets. It cascaded the grey room in gold. Jungkook's hair was a mess, a crown of deep black curls that covered his eyes. Jimin blinked, admiring Jungkook. His eyes trailed the dark ink tattooed on Jungkook's forearm, looking at the intricate designs up close. Jimin was surprised by how much color and whimsy was in them. Like the tattoos were simply another spark of joy and passion in Jungkook's life. He wanted to study them forever.

Jimin stifled a laugh as he sat up and dug his hands into the edge of the bed, looking out his window. He closed his eyes, stretching his neck and smiled so wide that it hurt his cheeks. It felt like his bed now. His room.

"Morning." Jungkook's sleepy voice mumbled and Jimin felt Jungkook's fingers trail down Jimin's bareback. The touch was soft, using the back of Jungkook's knuckles. Jimin leaned into it the way a cat would, curling his spine. His grin widened into a beam when he saw Jungkook's looking at him so warmly. He reached a hand to Jungkook's cheek, pulling him into a kiss and Jungkook chuckled before melting into it.

The kiss was long. Jimin didn't want to rush through it, didn't try to push and pull too fast or cause it to snowball into something neither of them could control. He kissed purposefully, trying to squeeze every ounce of feeling he could into each brush of their lips so Jungkook could sense Jimin's joy and his wonder throughout it. When Jimin pulled back, Jungkook was grinning.

"What was that for?" Jungkook said, sitting up against the bed's back frame.

"You're just so - bright." Jimin answered. He wanted to bottle Jungkook's light and keep it close to him. Everything about Jungkook felt precious. His laugh, his openness, his smile, his touch, his kindness. All of it was like a scarce gem Jimin managed to carve from the rock that was his life - and he was starting to grow extremely protective over it.

Jungkook put his hand on Jimin's thigh, noticing the intense shift to Jimin's eyes as his thoughts grew murderous against anyone who might take Jungkook away from him. Jimin looked down at Jungkook's fingers, at the tattoos inked on his knuckles and the way they grabbed his thigh, causing dips with in the muscle, before trailing his gaze up to meet Jungkook's serious own. The mafia leader's expression was stern, his brows furrowed in a way that felt almost shocking to Jimin who had rarely seen him so focused.

"Jimin, about last night." Jungkook started.

"You have notes already?" Jimin said, hoping for a laugh. Jungkook blushed instead, squeezing Jimin's thigh again. Jimin watched him swallow, that serious expression creasing his face and Jimin felt his heart sink. Was this it, then? Was this the moment Jungkook told Jimin he was done with him? Maybe all Jimin really was good for was sex. The Kims seemed to want to teach him as much, funny it would be a completely different gang to make him internalize it.

"I mean you definitely could bite me harder next time." Jungkook teased and Jimin rolled his eyes, glancing at the dark hickeys and bite marks all over Jungkook chest and throat. His mind flashed to Jungkook's lips on his own neck and Jimin shifted on the bed, surprised that he was starting to blush too. Was it bad that Jimin had liked it? Liked being with Jungkook in that way? Did it prove The Kims right? God, his head was starting to pound.

Jungkook's eyes darkened and his thumb rubbed Jimin's leg where he held him. Jungkook flicked his gaze back up to Jimin's then, really looking at him. "There's obviously no notes. Jimin, I just - I meant what I said last night. You're safe here with us. Your past is your past, it's what happens from now on that matters. I wanted to make sure I said that when we weren't in the middle of, you know, fucking."