Harsh "Love"

Chapter 10 -W

Kyles POV

"What's your favorite color?" I asked as I got into my car, starting the engine. I feel so awful she had to go through whatever Cartman did to her. I asked questions as I drove down to Cartmans to try and keep her mind away from whatever happened.

"I-I really like green.. It reminds me of nature, being free.." She answered, god I feel terrible. "That's great, greens a really pretty color." I tell her, I pretty much talk right after one of my sentences to make sure it's not silent. I don't want her to think deeper about whatever's going on.

"Favorite food?"

"I really like strawberries, oh and thinking about food.. theres this one vegan place I really enjoy, they serve the best fruit salad." I smile at her response, even though she can't see it. "Fruit, in my opinion, is so much better then vegetables. I'll eat vegetables, but fruit just taste better to me."

"Yeah, I agree. The vegan place I just mentioned, would you like to go there some time? If you don't like vegan stuff it's fine I just wanted to see."

I smile more and answer quickly. "Of course, I'd love to Heidi!"

"Thank you," she pauses for a moment, I know she's about to say something. It seems like she's struggling to say it. "..Eric would never wanna go with me, I'm glad you do."

"I'm up for anything." I continue talking and she replies until I finally get to Cartmans. "I'm here now," I tell her and she hangs up after saying okay. I see the door open and she walks out, slowly closing the door behind her. It seemed like she was worried about something. Probably Cartman.

She walks to the passenger side and I notice she's a bit wobbly. Her eyes are so puffy from her tears, it hurts seeing her like this. She opens the passenger door and gets in, buckling up.

"Thank you so much Kyle.." She said, her voice shaking. "You don't need to thank me, I'm always gonna be here. I promise that. Even if I'm busy, don't hesitate to call me." She nods, I don't mind she didn't say anything. She's clearly going through something.

I start driving onto the road, the music from the radio a bit quiet. "Do you want to tell me what happened in the car or at my house?"

"A-at your house, please.." I smile at her and nod. "I'm so sorry for whatever he did to you, I've never seen anyone cry as hard as you are."

"I- I just.." She started talking then stopped. I noticed she was wearing the sweater I gave her. I would've noticed before but there's other things to notice.

She's so beautiful, the tears pouring down her face aren't deserved. Her tears were dark from mixing with her mascara. I could tell she felt weak, and it hurt.

I heard her mumble something, and I looked over. "Heidi?"

She didn't answer, I don't think she heard me. She muttered something else, and I only heard a "why". I could tell she said more, but I couldn't hear.

I won't touch her, I don't want to scare her. "Heidi?" I repeat, maybe not loud enough. She's muttering a few more things. I was about to say one more thing but then I realize I got to my house. I park in the garage and look over at Heidi. "Heidi, we're here."

She looks over at me and nods. "Okay." I get out and she does the same. I walk over to her so I can walk inside next to her. She looks over at me and smiles a bit, but she's still crying. I can't blame her, whatever Cartman did was horrible.

She looks shaky and weak, like she can't walk. "Do you need help?"

She nods and I take her hand, helping her walk inside. I walk to my doorstep and open the door, walking in and she walks by my side as I close the door behind her.

I walk her over to the living room and she sits on the couch. I sit by her and look over at her. She stares at the ground and I notice that she starts to cry harder. "Do you wanna tell me what happened now?"

She takes a deep breath and looks at me. "Yeah.."

I put my hands on her cheeks, wiping her tears away with my thumbs. I see her face go a bit pink, and I smile. She takes another breath and starts speaking. "So.. I was watching a movie with him, one of my favorites, "Finding Randy,".. and uh he you know.. did something that implied, that," she paused, and I immediately knew what she meant. "I- I told him I don't wanna.. but he told me I owe him.."

I look at her, shocked. "Heidi.. owing someone something is like an object like money, or to help them do something. Doing that is something that both people need to consent to, him saying you owe him isn't a good excuse."

She nodded, somehow crying more. Heidi collapsed into my arms and I wrapped them around her, hugging her. "Go on, let it out."

"I told him no, so he started ignoring me.. I told him, "Please, don't ignore me," and he said he wouldn't if I let it happen.. I didn't want him ignoring me, so I said yes.. I don't know why, I didn't want him ignoring me. When h-he started, I told him I don't wanna anymore, but he said I owe him, again.. I don't remember owing him anything, and I don't know why I didn't fight.. The words, "you owe me" were repeating in my head. When he was finally done, he passed out.. I wanted to leave. But I didn't wanna use my car, he got it for me.. I don't wanna use anything he's gotten me. I feel dirty, gross. The only thing I wanted to do was see someone else, anyone but him.. It was late, I didn't wanna bother anyone but I-I just wanted to go so I called you.."

What. What the fuck. "Heidi.. I'm so sorry." Her tears fell onto my shirt, but I didn't care. All I could care about right now is helping Heidi. "I don't know why I owed him that.. I discussed with him before I don't wanna until marriage, but I felt forced.."

"You didn't owe him anything, Heidi. This is an awful situation, going through that can bring years of trauma, but I promise, there's people who will be there for you through it. I promise Ill be one of them."

She nodded and I heard her mumble, "thank you". I smiled and hugged her a bit tighter. "Do you want me to drop you off?"

"Yes please.." I nodded, "Okay."