Alice's Secret Obsession

Shimmering Wings & Ashes: Side Story Part 2

----Sarathiel---- 

----After the discussion with Zagan before the fall---- 

I frown as I think about Zagan's words. His words... How could he or any of them-- specifically Lucifer harbor such thoughts? Isn't Lucifer supposed to be the Mighty Lord's perfect and most loyal of all of us? He is supposed to be the light bringer, the morning star. I feel so... Betrayed by him. Lifting my hands to my head, I think about the smile Zagan made. It causes me to shiver. 

I begin to walk toward the general location of the other cherubs. As I see the regular and unchanged cherubs, I start feeling better. They are discussing how they wish they never need to use their instruments of war. I desire that as well, but I know we will have to. I feel I should tell Michael about what Zagan told me. And so I do, although I do not say that Zagan told me. I can tell Michael does not want to believe my words, particularly about Lucifer. I do not wish to accept these words either. With an air of pity, Michael thanks me again before returning to the Holy Lord's side. 

----The start of the war---- 

I quickly approach Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael, with the remainder of my brethren, regarding our orders. Stoic and mournful, they relay our orders. We are to capture our fallen siblings, bring them to Purgatory, and leave the Nephilim and Lucifer to Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael. We are also told to use force if they resist. At these orders, a few more cherubs' heads fell, and they willingly went to Purgatory themselves. This all depresses me... 

We went in small battalions to the villages tainted by my brethren and their offspring. Half of them were cooperative, while the other half were not. The half that were cooperative were our siblings who wanted to procreate. The others were all with Lucifer and did not seem to want anything more than to inflict pain and suffering. 

As we take our siblings to Purgatory, most of my unfallen brethren are solemn and do not seem to view any of our fallen siblings as well... Siblings. My unfallen siblings are truly austere. Despite this, I still regard the fallen as our family; they are only misguided. I still love the fallen, just as I love everything else the Mighty Lord-- our Father, has created. I can see that our siblings who chose to marry man's sons and daughters to experience having children of their own, and because they loved man so deeply, see and regret their actions, for they never desired to corrupt or for their offspring to cause such chaos for man, whom they love so much. I feel that these siblings are redeemable, whereas the fallen following Lucifer are unredeemable. I know they will never change and do not want to change. They only seek the destruction of the beautiful garden Father has nurtured into perfection. I do not understand how someone could change seemingly over two celestial days. 

This unpleasant event lasts ten celestial days, or one millennium in Earth years, give or take a century or two. On the last and final day, I decide upon looking for my remaining siblings on my own. The one I am truly looking to find is Zagan. He is sitting alone. His beautiful silver wings are gone. All that remains are bloody feathers and two large jointed bones that used to be wings. He has two scars on his back where his shoulder blades are. It is a dreadful sight that makes me feel nauseous. And the way he smiles gratefully at me as if he is happy to see me fills me with pity. Are my eyes wet? What is this? Am I crying like man does? My throat is tightening, and I am finding it hard to breathe, so I open my mouth, but all that comes out is a scream. I know I should not, but I cannot help myself. I throw my arms around Zagan as I cry, screaming out in anguish. 

----Zagan---- 

Sarath finally spots me. At first, she appears delighted to see me. As she fully sees my condition, her face is terrified. I smile at her, as I am happy to see her. Although I feel ruthful. It pains my being to see her this way. Then tears fill her eyes and she screams disparately. The sound of agony and anguish in her voice rings out. I did not know another being could cause me to feel things. To feel emotions such as these. I do not comprehend the depth of my thoughts and feelings for her until I hear her scream and feel her arms wrap tightly around me. My voice chokes as I utter, "You should save your tears for someone who deserves your pity, Sara... I am not worthy of such kindness." 

And I wrap my arms around her, softly stroking her dazzling gold wings. Upon my words, Sarath proceeds to beat her tiny fists against my chest and shoulders while muttering, "You fool, that is for me to decide... Now, stay still while I hug you. I have missed you so much, Zo." 

Without my consent, my lips spout, "I have missed you too, dear sister." 

Sarath whispers, "How could you do this to yourself? Why did you have to fall?" 

I cannot think of any response other than, "I had to fall. I needed proof." 

Sarath stops hitting me when she says, "I need to take you to Purgatory. Will you go willingly, Zo?" 

I merely smile. "Of course." 

I remove my hands from her wings, and she spreads her wings broad. With a sigh and her arms wrapped even more securely around me, we soar upwards, past the clouds in the sky, past the vast galaxies. This is not the way. She is taking me home. "Sarathiel, why are you taking me back? You were instructed to take me to Purgatory." 

Sarathiel's voice is sharp as she states, "I must consult the Mighty Lord before taking you to Purgatory." 

I know why she is doing this. She will beg for forgiveness for me and for me to be healed. She loves me too much to let me go. The very second we reach the gates of Heaven, I feel dread for the first time. It is rather unpleasant. Sarathiel drags me in the direction of the scales and the throne room. Gabriel and Raphael stride toward us. Raphael has a look of disgust and rage, while Gabriel has a look of dismay, yet his eyes are merciful. 

Raphael yells, "Sarathiel! The orders were absolutely explicit. You should have taken Zagan to Purgatory, not here!" 

Sarathiel is silent, as is Gabriel. Raphael continues, "You must go to Purgatory yourself, Sarathiel. You did not follow the orders, and that is unforgivable!" 

Sarathiel finally speaks. "I know I will, and I accept that. Please, Gabriel... Raphael, I only need a moment to speak with the Mighty and Holy Lord. If you do not allow me this, then can you at least heal Zagan? I beg you, please, brothers!" 

Raphael immediately snaps, "You have no right t--!" but he stops short as Gabriel puts his hand on his shoulder and wordlessly nods at Sararthiel.