In Love with My Best Friend || Ni-Ki (Nishimura Riki) x Female Reader

~twelve~

Y/N POV:
The second his lips were on mine, I felt the butterflies caged inside, explode into tiny fireworks. I want to escape, but it feel like I'm just drawn to him, after all, he was and still will be my first ever love.

"I love you, Choi Y/N. Please forgive me and give me one more chance to prove my love for you. Be mine again?" He asks, his eyes gazing into mine. His eyes told a story of regret. 

"The answer to your question is not easy. Believe me when I say no matter how many times I try to forget you, you always seem to crawl back into my mind. I love you and I'm going to admit that. But the things you've done, aren't so forgivable, I'm sorry. We can't be together just yet, but I would like to be friends again or start at the very beginning like 2 strangers. I hope you understand" I solemnly reply.

"I understand. I will wait even for an eternity if I have to for you to tell me your response. I know I may have done stupid fucked up things, but believe me, at the bottom of my heart, I am madly attracted to you. So thank you for at least giving me a chance" Niki says as his lips are drawn to mine once again. "Well, 5 minutes is over. Goodbye my love"

I start walking away, feeling his gaze behind me. Once I leave this park, there is no turning back. My decision has been made. I walk back to my dorm and plummet onto my bed. Slowly falling into a state of calmness and sleep....

~~Y/N's Dream from Author's Perspective~~
"Choi Y/N! You made it! I'm so proud of you!" a male voice exclaims.

"Seongjin?" Y/N shouts.

"Yes, it's me, your older brother" Seongjin replies.

"Why did you leave?" Y/N asks as tears form at the corner of her eyes.

"To be your conscience, to guide you, to help you, to make you a better person" Seongjin replies.

"But why am I here?" Y/N asks once more.

"These past few weeks, I've noticed something different, you have changed. You are no longer that sweet girl I knew, you are now the heartless girl. Niki changed you. The course of events have changed you" Jin (Seongjin's Name expect shorter version) says.

"I..I thought I could trust him but he goes do such stupid things. I want to love him but I don't know how to anymore" Y/N responds.

"You should love him. You haven't been the best person either. You shouted at him, ignored him, ghosted him, hurt him. Because you were angry at him. All that for what? Be the bigger person, accept his apology and see what happens. Sometimes giving someone a second chance is good thing, but some people don't deserve a second chance, like your friend Jieun. You may have suicide through to now, but hear me out. Don't leave now, fight to be in your own life. Be better than me. Until we meet again, little sis. I love you" Jin says as he slowly fades off.

~~End of Dream~~

Author's POV
Y/N wakes up the next morning feeling confused and teary. Was the vision of her brother real?

"Omo, Y/N, are you alright?" Nabi asks as she notices that Y/N is a bit teary. "Bad dream again?"

"I'm fine" Y/N replies getting ready for school.

"Okay, tell me when you're ready, I'm drop you off at school" Nabi responds.

"Nah, all good. Jake is coming to pick me up" Y/N replies. "We organised this yesterday"

"Oooooo, that's interesting" Nabi says.

"Nope, he is like an older brother to me" Y/N replies, slightly wacking Nabi on the arm.

~~At School~~
The stares, whispers, rumours slightly died down but they were still there. This time, Y/N ignored everyone, including her friends.

~~After School~~
"Come join us!" Jake yells.

"Sorry, I have to go to the library to study" Y/N replies as Jake looks a little crestfallen.

"You know where to find us if you change your mind, in our dorm" Jake responds as he walks off.

Sighing, Y/N heads towards the library. Laptop on hand. Headphones on her head. Analysing through pages and pages of poems. Reading was her thing. It was her safety pin. Y/N can get lost for endless hours in literature and beautifully composed pieces of writing. Books are an escape from reality. You can get lost in words, in images.
Book after book. Piece after piece. Poem after poem. Song after song. Composition after composition.
One specific poem stood out to Y/N and it is just fucking beautiful.

Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one's head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no tomorrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace - Oscar Wilde

This one got her crying. She understood it deeply. Her brother was now at peace from the torture and pain he went through to protect Y/N and Yejun. To be at peace with oneself. As Y/N flipped to the last page of the book, a small piece of paper slipped out, fluttering onto the table like a butterfly.

-Challenges in life will eventually leave but death is permanent-
-Anonymous

Is this what her brother meant when he said he better than me. Did he truly regret letting death take him by the hand?

Y/N felt guilty for her brothers death. If she did defend him, he might still be alive. But she was selfish and chose not to. Tears formed once more at the corner of her eyes. She slowly let her head fall onto the table, falling asleep. Hours passed by.

Y/N woke up to a pair of beautiful chocolate coloured eyes staring down at her and delicately caressing her cheek...

Author's Message

This chapter is dedicated to my good friend, mangoandgrapefruit

I hope you continue to live in this harsh world without getting hurt.

Since life is too short, I may as well say this. Thank you for always being there for me, whether it's the 12 am chats or the everyday talks.

Thank you once more