Settling Slowly

Chapter 12 - Dan Support System

I stayed up late getting my sketchbook done and didn't head up to bed until about one in the morning. I crept up the stairs and into mine and Dan's room only to find him sat on the end of his bed, a mug of what I assumed was water in his hands. He flinched a little when I shut the door and it was then that I realised he was trembling a little.

"Dan?" I whispered.

He flinched again but this time looked up and relief filled his eyes. He came down the ladder and put his mug on the desk which was at the end of the bed and without warning gave me a fierce hug. I purposely dropped my sketchbook to the floor and hugged him back instantly, soothing him and even though I had no idea what was wrong with him I promised him that it was all ok or that I'd make it ok if it wasn't.

"No," he sniffed which was when I realised that he was crying. Dan never cried. He shook his head a little but didn't let me go. "It - it was only a nightmare."

I relaxed and held him a bit tighter.

"I've had it a few times tonight."

"Want to talk about it?" I asked.

He vehemently shook his head and began shaking all over again.

"Ok, ok," I soothed. "It's ok. It's ok. Let's sit down, yeah?"

I pulled him over to my bed and he leaned his head against my shoulder. I kissed his head and shifted a little so that I could put my arms around him again. I accidentally clonked his head with my cast which made him wince and chuckle at the same time.

"Can't resist can you?" he asked in a quiet voice though his tone was light as if some order of the universe had been restored.

"If you're good at something you may as well flaunt it," I replied in the same tone.

"I love you, Zoey."

"I love you too," I murmured back, slightly confused.

Of course I knew that he loved me, but neither of us were in the habit of confessing the truth aloud. I wondered what prompted it for most of that sleepless night. Dan kept on having the nightmare, but never waking up properly even though I shook him enough for it to fade away.

"Please don't tell Mum and Dad," he said when he woke up.

"Um... ok," I said.

He walked back over from his wardrobe and pulled me into a tight hug and kissed my head.

"Daaaan?"

He sighed. "It was about you guys, ok. And... losing you."

I didn't entirely believe him, but nodded and promised I wouldn't tell. It was pretty early so I went to bed hoping to get some sleep this time around and asked him to wake me up at eleven. Even so when I got up five hours later I needed a hot shower to kick start my brain (complete with a carrier bag, lots of clingfilm and sellotape for my cast) and a huge bowl of porridge. Though it wasn't snowing, it had hung around because it was so cold. Apparently it was nearly the start of spring. I scowled at the overcast sky and then as if to spite me it decided to rain. I glowered. I'd just blow dried my hair and put some loose tumbler curls in it.

"Dan looks like crap," Dad said.

I grinned. "Fifty pee for the swear jar, Dad."

He rolled his eyes but grabbed his wallet from the unit and gave me the money which was fair enough as the millions that I put in the tin went straight to take out tea and brownies for him.

"He didn't sleep well and then got up early when he gave up with it," I shrugged. "I didn't sleep much better either."

"That whole telepathic twins thing finally working?" he asked with light humour.