Love Me, Harm Me

You (make me feel) at home

"Memories, even your most precious ones, fade surprisingly quickly. But I don't go along with that. The memories I value most, I don't ever see them fading."
― Kazuo Ishiguro, Never Let Me Go

.☀.🌑.☀.🌑.

She couldn't let the feeling go. Even though Elizabeth was tucked up and cozy, hiding away at Jericho's because she knew that Meliodas would come looking for her at Elaine's or Diane's, Elizabeth could still feel her own agitation, her own restlessness, growing with every second. Ever since she'd taken that decision to go bowling instead of movie night, ever since she had decided to just not care, that feeling had been there.

Freedom, Elizabeth was tempted to call it. Intoxicating freedom that overwhelmed her senses and made her reckless and guilt-free - just like Meliodas seemed to be most of the time. It was a feeling that made your veins feel electrified, amped up, filled to brim with energy that just made you want to go out and do anything and everything you could ever possibly try.

But Elizabeth knew better than that. That was why when Mael suggested playing a game of pool after the bowling alley closed, Elizabeth immediately called it a night. All too easily she had split ways with him, called trusty old Jericho and hopped onto the quickest bus headed toward the Lewisham area.

When Elizabeth eventually got to Jericho's flat, nearly at eleven o'clock at night, she had been welcomed with open arms. Hot chocolates at the ready, Bride Wars ready to play on the TV and a bundle of fluffy blankets piled onto the sofa, Jericho was well-equipped to deal with heartbreak damage control; she wasn't a stranger to the crippling nonchalance of men.

Nevertheless, even with the company and the comedy and the soothing caramel of Jericho's secret recipe, Elizabeth couldn't help but feel lonely. There was too much quiet, too much comfort, for her to truly feel relaxed. With all the chatter filling her mind, the endless thoughts that harassed her brain, Elizabeth needed noise, distractions, to keep herself occupied.

So when Jericho groused about some big party they were missing, thrown at an old school friend's place in Croydon, Elizabeth jumped at the opportunity to become thoughtless, careless and free once more. In a matter of seconds she was raiding Jericho's room, pulling out outfits and equipping herself with makeup and hair tools.

"You're in no shape to party, Elizabeth. I strongly advise against it," Jericho had told her as Elizabeth forced her into a pretty black dress. Honestly, Elizabeth was stunned that her friend even owned such a girly item; most of Jericho's wardrobe consisted of pretty androgynous outfit styles, leaning more toward the masculine side.

"Well you don't know what's best for me," Elizabeth had retorted, zipping up the back of her friend's dress. A coy smile then graced her lips as she pushed Jericho toward her mirror, allowing her to see the dress on herself. "Plus there might be a ton of cute singles there~"

Using the incentive of handsome men and gorgeous women was a dirty trick for Elizabeth to play - she knew that. Jericho couldn't ever resist the trap of meeting someone who would finally end her string of endless heartbreak; deviously, selfishly, Elizabeth was using that to her advantage, aware of just how far Jericho would go.

"Fine," The woman had pouted, her cheeks an apple red as she crossed her arms over her chest. Unable to resist the flare of fanning out an enticingly flowy skirt, she gave a little twirl in front of her mirror. "But I'm driving."

There'd never been a better arrangement. Elizabeth's goal for the night was to enjoy herself as much as humanly possible; Jericho's goal was to get laid. Everything, from the driving duty to the location, was the perfect setup. Everything was laying down the foundations for Elizabeth to feel young again: free and careless and dipping her toes into the pool of carefree young adulthood.