This is How We Break | Jungkook

Part 9

It's on a Sunday afternoon when Jungkook texts you that he'll drop by your apartment to return the staging items you lent Taehyung after their company was once again featured in a magazine. You'd said that Saturday night would be okay but Jungkook drank with the guys and ended up sleeping over at Jin's.

He stands by your door with a paper bag in hand, happy that he gets to have a reason to see you again.

Things have been going well since the trip to the lake. He's afraid to be deliberate in his intentions with you, so he, with the help of his friends, takes advantage when the opportunity presents itself.

Like sitting next to you during the lunches that Namjoon and Da-eun invite you to, joining you on clean up duty during drinking sessions at Jin's, agreeing with Taehyung to contact you to consult on some design aspects of their projects so you could meet up for coffee or at their office.

You two talk as friends do - you update each other about work, your families, something new you discovered, and you can talk about your past without bitterness or anger. There's fondness in the memories, pride in what you've both accomplished, and faith that everything turned out as they should.

Jungkook settles for this, as the fear of losing you again is greater than whatever desire he has to be anything more with you.

He waits a while after he rings the doorbell, curious about the chattering and buzzing sound on the other side. It doesn't sound like Jimin and Areum laughing or you and Yoongi bickering, and he's trying to analyze who could be around when the door creaks open and he's greeted by a familiar smile, one that's always given him comfort - after yours, of course.

"Are my eyes betraying me?" The woman gasps. "Jungkook, my darling, is that really you?"

"Grandma!" Jungkook all but jumps at her.

He lets himself be enveloped in her hug, as he whispers, "it's me, and I've missed you so much, too."

"Grandma!" You scold. "I told you I'd get the door."

You look up and your scowl turns into a look of shock. "Jungkook, hi. Uhm, I didn't know you were coming," you stammer.

"I thought it would be okay to drop by in the afternoon," he bites his lips. "I... Well, I texted and I was really just gonna return these." He hands the paper bag to you but your grandmother takes it then takes his hand.

"Come on inside, darling. We're preparing dinner." She pulls him inside your apartment and announces to the rest of your family. "Guess who's here!"

The noise dies down as everyone turns to Jungkook. You could hear a pin drop as your parents and your younger sister, all wide-eyed and open-mouthed, look at you then at him, then they all break into smiles. They all hug him, leaving you shaking your head and giggling, as you watch Jungkook's panicked look turn into one of longing and comfort.

Your family loved him. Though they'd voiced out some concerns at one point, given how they'd been a little impatient with how your relationship was progressing, they always knew how much he loved you.

The rest of your family resume their responsibilities, with your father stepping out to grab a few things from the supermarket not far away. You're hesitant to return to the kitchen to leave Jungkook with your grandmother but she gives you a reprimanding look.

"Go help your mother, sweetie. I'll catch up with Jungkook. I've missed him so much and it's been three very long years."

You scrunch your eyebrows at her but also know that she'll just nag you in the kitchen if she's not entertained so you give in. "Fine but please, behave."

Jungkook laughs and you excuse yourself, as you watch them settle on the couch and engage in conversation.

It was all going so well.

Jungkook always adored your grandmother because she's amusingly blunt. He'd found himself in the middle of one of your arguments with her and he'd long figured out it happens because you're so alike - you got your warmth from your mother but your passion and feistiness was definitely from your grandmother.

He shares how life has been like, convincing his parents that law school just isn't for him, and proudly talks about the company and how much you've helped, saying that you two have been catching up ever since you got back.

"Oh, darling. You're just as sweet as I remember," she says, as Jungkook sits back down on the couch after he helped your mother reach for some things on your cupboard. You shared a quick laugh after that and your grandmother didn't miss the way Jungkook's smile softened at your look.

"When you two broke up, I kept thinking that it was temporary, that you'd both come around and realize it was a mistake," she says. "But she left then I heard from her friends that you went back to be with your parents, too, and I was devastated. I mean, anyone would be a fool to not see how much you loved each other, and as her grandmother, that's always meant so much, you know?" She smiles. "You looked at her the way her father looks at her mother. It was wonderful to witness."

"I'm sorry I couldn't make her happy," Jungkook croaks. It's something that no longer makes him cry but hearing it from your own family hits different. "She's talked a lot about her time in Melbourne and it really seemed like she found her happiness there."

"Oh, she did," your grandmother happily sighs. "She always had a reason to call home, just to tell us what she and her sister had done or gone to. And there was Sam, you know? He was such a blessing to her."

Jungkook freezes and feels the life drain out of him. It seemed like an unwritten rule - do not talk about your exes with your exes; it was why Jungkook never did because, well, those he dated after you were more like flings than they were relationships. But hearing about someone making you happy when he couldn't, about that man being a blessing to you when Jungkook stopped being one - it's causing him a kind of pain he'd tried hard to no longer feel.

"I'm glad he was," is all Jungkook manages to say.

"Things don't always turn out the way we want them to," she continues. "But I truly believe that while people and dreams and needs change, great love doesn't." She looks at Jungkook with tender eyes. "Sometimes it takes temporarily losing it to remind us that we can't, in fact, live without it."

The heaviness he's feeling lightens somehow, as he tries to think of this as your grandmother telepathically telling him something more. The moment is disrupted when your father returns and you announce that dinner is ready.

Jungkook's just about to excuse himself when your mother turns to him. "Stay. Have dinner with us."

He doesn't know what to make of it because who invites their daughter's ex-boyfriend to dinner? But he thinks of how much he's missed them, too, and that looking back, they'd become his family and he didn't get to say goodbye.

"That would be nice," he says, turning to you, who's got a hopeful smile on your face.

The dinner isn't awkward, as he slightly worried it would be. There's much interest in his company, and he appreciates them not mentioning the breakup or your exes. They ask about his family, too. You laugh along at the conversation and Jungkook basks in this for a moment.

He wonders if you laughed the same way with Sam, if he's why the light in your smile and the sparkle in your eyes are back. He scoffs at himself at the feeling of jealousy, even if he doesn't know much about the man and what you shared.

Jungkook turns to you.

You're his great love and he knows what it's like to lose you. Letting you go was the biggest risk, and he could only hope that since then, no one has taken that place of his in your life, too.