Part Of The Band ||| Solby

Ch. 18

*Colby pov*

Day I don't even know of being in this hell hole. I hate it here, it's awful. I no longer have the choice of eating in my room which sucks. But you know what's even worse, I have a stupid ass roommate. Okay he's not that bad, but he's very talkative. His name is Brandon, I think, and he said that he admitted himself because he was dealing with self-harm.

Why would he want to be here?

He's probably answered that question, but to be honest I really don't listen to him. At all.

Dr. Lundy is the highlight of my day, which is sad. She's an actual therapist and this is her job, it's genuinely upsetting that i look forward to seeing her.

"Cole, how are you doing today? Hows the roommate?" I shrugged at Dr. Lundy's question really not knowing. "He's fine I guess, I dunno." She nodded and pointed at the seat for me to sit in. "Have you spoken to him?" I shook my head. "Maybe you should start there." I rolled my eyes and huffed, this was going to be long. "I'm just saying Cole you might really benefit from talking to someone other than me." Her tone changed to something serious and demanding, but I really didn't care. The only person I wanted to talk to was Sam. "Okay. So today I want to talk about attaching emotions to people. You told me the other day that you were only happy around Sam, that's not healthy. You're two other friends Jack an-" "Jake." I interrupted her, she didn't seem to care. "Right, Jake, and Kat need to know that you can be happy around them. If you're only ever happy around Sam they're going to think that you don't like them anymore."

"Okay, but I am only happy around Sam." She nodded and put down her pen. "Yes I get that, that's the problem. I used to be the same way. I was only ever tolerable around one of my friends. When everyone else realized they left, then he left too. I don't want that to happen to you, or anyone. Remember all the good times and memories you've made with them, that will help you remember that you can have fun with them."

Her advice didn't really make sense to me. Sure thinking about the good times will make me remember we can have fun. But that was then and a lot of shit has happened since then. But i didn't tell her that, it's not like I'll be around for long after I get out. I'm moving asap, and I'm not telling anyone, i'm just going to let them forget me.

I've got it all planned out. First I'll sneak in at night and pack all my things, then I'll stay in a hotel until I find a house. I wont te- "Cole, hello?" I snapped back to reality as Dr. Lundy called my name. "Hmm?"
"I was trying to talk with you. Tell me what you were thinking about."

"Sam." I lied, I knew if she asked anything about Sam I could go on and on. "I miss him, y'know?" She nodded and her eyes turned soft. "Lucky for you, you only have a week and a half left! Then you can see him, he's already scheduled for your pick up." "Pick up?" I asked obviously confused. "Yes." She answered sensing my confusion. "We have to have a family member or friend pick up our patients so that we know they're safe." Fuck. "Oh."

...

*Sam pov*

Ten days. Ten days until I pick up Colby. Ten days until i find out if it worked or not.

I'm fucking terrified that he hasn't changed. What if he hates me? I couldn't blame him, right? I mean I would hate me too.

Amy's been trying to cheer me up, but nothings working. I feel bad for that too but seems like everything is pointless if I don't have Colby running after me like a lost dog. When i used to do anything he was right there, either annoying me or flirting. I didn't realize just how much of a role he played in my life. And what if I'm never going to get him back.

What if he still wants to move? Would he cut me off too, or just Jake and Kat? Could I lie to them about that? They would see right through me, i'm a horrible liar.

Why couldn't Colby just be normal? Why couldn't he just move on from a break up like everyone else? God, why does he have to make everything so difficult? Without him my life would be so much easier.

...

What am I saying?

So he might not be good at everything like I thought he was. My life wouldn't be any easier without him than it is now. If anything he's made my life better. He gave me what I've always wanted, a real music career. I'm an awful friend. But I guess it won't matter it's not like he's going to like me anymore after he gets out.

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