Beloved Murderer

Broken Beloved - Chapter 3

Mason managed to book us an appointment with the only town doctor that morning. He made me an extravagant breakfast and watched me carefully as I wolfed it all down and then held my hair as I proceeded to vomit it all up.

Round two of breakfast was a piece of toast and an apple that I managed to keep down. Mason raised his eyebrow in question when I grabbed the apple, knowing that I never usually ate apples, but it was what I felt like, something soothing to settle my stomach.

Mason kept his hands wrapped around my waist as we walked down the gravel driveway to his car. But he was holding me more like I needed the support rather than just to hold me and I shrugged him off.

"I am not an invalid. I am capable of walking in a straight line," I grumbled, crossing my hands over my chest.

"What if you fell?" He questioned, wrapping his hands around me again from behind as if he was worried to release me for a moment. There was no joking in his tone, only seriousness. I just glared over my shoulder at him.

"You do have my baby growing inside you," he remarked in answer to my glare and continued to hold me securely.

"Since when did you care about our baby?" I growled, remembering his decision to leave us and the only reason he was with me now was because I sought him out. I started to regret my decision to release him from the handcuffs, I much preferred him tied down rather than being all falsely caring.

"I am doing this for the baby," Mason's voice became soft, vulnerable as he looked away. His vulnerability made my heart tug, and I growled in annoyance at him. Even when I was angry at him, he still managed to make me feel like he was the one who had been wronged. He released me, holding his hands up in the air in surrender. He did open the passenger door to his car for me and I glowered at him as I sat in the seat.

"Has the morning sickness passed?" He asked once we had turned out of the driveway.

"Yes, I feel much better now. I find it's mainly when I'm eating."

"How do you feel otherwise?" he pressed as he turned his concerned blue gaze onto the black circles under my eyes.

"Fine, when you are with me." I shot him a direct look and crossed my arms over my chest. Mason shifted in his seat, and I knew sometimes he still found it uncomfortable by how open I was about my feelings for him. He tended to be more reserved and only spoke about his feelings when there was a moment of high passion or emotion. He didn't reply or say anything else for the rest of the car trip.

The doctor's appointment went well, the doctor confirmed that I was indeed pregnant. I was to taper off my anti-anxiety medication slowly and she put me on some other supplements which were good for the baby. We had our first scan booked for two weeks' time, but I didn't mention what I dreaded to focus on in the back of my mind, if Mason was even going to be there for that scan.

I didn't speak to him the entire way home. I looked out of the window with my hands crossed until he pulled up at the cottage. Dread pooled in my bottom of my stomach as I turned to Mason to ask him what I had been avoiding all day.

"Are you coming inside?" I asked, my voice filled with consternation because his answer to this question was going to dictate my happiness for the rest of my life. Mason looked over at me and his stoic expression and sad blue eyes gave me his answer before he said it.

"No." He shook his head. I felt like I had been punched in the chest and my lungs had been ripped out of my body. The intensity of the sudden pain was overwhelming, and tears started falling down my cheeks as I sobbed. I couldn't stay in that car with him, knowing that he didn't want me, didn't want us.