You're losing me

Because us traitors never win.

MATTHEO POV

What did I do? More like why did I do that? She had the right to know but gosh that hurt. I had never suspected love to hurt that bad. I couldn't move, she would never trust me again. I wanted to run after her but I couldn't move. I truly loved her and I let her go.

"Mr Riddle, Mr Riddle!"

I heard from afar.

"Mr Riddle, we are talking to you!"

I slowly turned my head to see Snape holding Draco's arm.

"Can you please take Mr Malfoy in his dorm."

"I....yeah..." I said

I was completely lost. Draco walked next to me so did I.

"I almost succeeded getting in the room. I was so close... Mattheo, are you alright?"

I didn't answer

"Mattheo?"

"What? What, yes, yes.."

"No you're not. You know you can talk to me.."

"Draco."

"What? Yes, I admit I'm not good at advices but you're my friend. I guess."

I looked at him.

"Oh, it's this Gryffindor. Isn't it?"

"Don't call her like that."

"Don't tell me you've really fallen in love with her?"

"No, of course not."

"Then why, when she was poisoned, did you get so angry? Well, angry is an understatement."

"Because it was my mission, mine. Nobody had to do it for me."

"So everything's fine? She's not dead, you still have a chance to kill her yourself."

Silence

"Right, Mattheo?"

"Yes... yes."

"Right, then. Sorry by the way."

I frowned

"Sorry about what?"

"About the mission. Sorry, I just thought if I helped you a bit it would go quicker. That's it, that's all."

"Was that you? Did you poison her ? You lied to my face! "

"No, I didn't! No, it wasn't me. I asked Snape to do it. One little potion and she'd be gone. I only thought I was helping you. Of course I couldn't have done that. (Short pause) I'm scared Mattheo. "

I looked him in the eye and said

"Draco, I'm scared too."

Y/N POV

It was winter and the gravel on which I was sitting on was cold. It didn't matter to me. I couldn't think straight, Mattheo's mission was to kill me? Mattheo, that was impossible. It was a dream, a bad dream in which I'd been transported in my sleep. But dreams were often more beautiful than reality, in this case waking up would have been sweeter than the dream. I had no idea what to do, should I tell Dumbledore? Should I tell Hermione? Tell Harry? Or Ron? All I wanted was to be left alone. With my thoughts. This was nothing new, my thoughts and myself alone. But this time the voices were louder than ever, they were there in the back of my head: it was obvious, wasn't it? Why didn't you see anything?

"Y/N.... What are you doing here?"

I recognised that voice, Hermione. I didn't even bother to turn around.

She walked over and sat down next to me.

"It's going to be all right. I'm here."

And for the first time in a long time, I had allowed myself to break down.

———————————

MATTHEO POV

The Christmas holidays had just begun and I still hadn't done what the Dark Lord had said. I knew what to expect, but what else was I supposed to do?

We were gathered in the Malfoy living room.

"Master." Lucius said, bowing.

The Dark Lord pushed him so hard that he lost his balance.

"Dumbledore is still not dead, and neither is little Y/L/N."

He was addressing Draco and me.

"He tried..." Narcissa tried to say.

"Enough!"

She was silent.

"Your desperate attempts were nothing but pathetic....." He said to Draco

".... But I don't blame you, Draco. I'm just... disappointed ."

Draco looked down. The Dark Lord's gaze lingered on me.

"And you, how many years have I given you? Three long years with no results. My disappointment is greater and greater with each passing day. (He came close to my ear) What are you? Weak?"

Silence in the room. No one dared to speak.

"Draco, take your wand and practice the spells your father taught you. Mattheo, stand in front of him."

I did so. Draco took out his wand and looked at me apologetically. But what could you do against the Dark Lord?

—————————

I was sitting on a chair in my room, a quill in my hand. I had to explain everything to Y/N. I was writing him a letter that could cost me my life.

Dear Y/N,
Please believe me. I can't bear not hearing from you. I never wanted you to hate me, and I never wanted to kill you. But as you said yourself, I'm a Riddle and Riddles have obligations. I'm yours and nobody else's.

Your favourite Slytherin.

Mattheo.

AN
hiii guys, sorry I didn't post yesterday it was bc I tried to prepare myself mentally for getting Eras Tour tickets the next day. But ticketmaster crashed this morning so I didn't get tickets. Live laugh love ticketmaster💜