𝐓𝐎𝐗𝐈𝐂 | 𝐏.𝐉𝐇

ch.5

after putting her stubborn ass back to sleep i got out of her room, i'll sleep on her couch tonight since i don't think she'll want me sleeping next to her.

now it all make sense why she was at the club, she just wanted to get back at me for going to a club and getting all touchy with another girl.

i admit it was my fault, i should have no excuses for my actions but i just can't help myself, i was plainly just trying to run away from the fear of being abandoned if i invest into a relationship, its not that i don't trust y/n but i just can't be in a relationship, it'll hurt me once i invest myself into it.

after some thoughts about how i should explain myself and beg for her forgiveness the next morning i fell asleep.

-next morning

i open my eyes cause i hear some movements in the kitchen, and there was y/n, looking through the medication cabinet.

"looking for the hangover pills?" i asked, she just ignored me and continued looking for the pills, now i stood up and went towards her and she just took the pills and walked pass me, ignoring me.

"can we talk? don't just ignore me" i said while she walks into her room, slamming the door behind her
i've never seen her act like this before, i might have really fuck it up.

then why am i feeling scared of losing her? isn't this what i want? to push her away? but then why do i also feel like i want her to myself?

i went back to the couch thinking of what to do, cook her breakfast? buy her breakfast? what if she locks me out while im out?

she then comes out with her empty cup, walking straight to the kitchen, i called out to her, "y/n, let's talk, im serious." i said

again, she just ignores me while washing her cup, "y/n, im talking to you, don't ignore me." i said with a hint of stern in voice, i was getting frustrated.

"what? what is there to even talk about? you aren't a man of your words, you're not worthy of my words." she said and try to walk pass me and that's when i grabbed her arm to prevent her from walking away.

"listen to me, im sorry ok? i shouldn't have done what i did, especially after our talk 2 days ago.

"move." she simply said, "no." i replied, while pinning her onto the kitchen table, "didn't you already get your revenge by making out with some random ass dude from the club last night? aren't we fair now?" i said and she scoffed, "that was revenge for last night, what about the days before last night? the days where you were shoving your tongue in all the other bitches mouths?" she spat, "that was in the past, you gotten your revenge last night, thats all it matters right now right?" i told her.

"no, it isn't the same, maybe that guy can commit to me and actually give me what you can't" she said, that was when i felt my blood boiling, i was getting mad and annoyed at the point.

"just so you know i HATE sharing what's mine, and YOU'RE MINE" i spat out, "yours? you're not even trying to guard what's yours then, and not to mention how many "yours" do you have??" she said with a tone of sacarsm, that's the thing i don't fancy about her the most, her sacarsm when she's mad.

"not guarding? i wont be rushing out to save you from that guy who has ill intentions for you if its not because i like-" i said while stopping at the last part, "like? like who? see, you don't even understand your own fucking feeling, you don't even like me genuinely like how i like you so why are you trying to label me as your person?" she asked, "i don't want to be with someone who is unsure about me." she added.

"i like you, i fucking do." i said