ateez - in his mind

fourteen

The next hour was spent in the most intense silence anyone had ever experienced. All they could think about was how their friend was in trouble, or worse, dead. Not an ounce of hope was seen on the boys' once bright faces, their eyes filled with a fear nobody could describe. They're hope vanished with the absence of their youngest friend.

By noon, San had locked himself in his room for over an hour. Seonghwa stood inches from his door, pondering whether or not it was a good idea to talk to his younger brother. He knew that San felt guilty for not being able to reach Jongho through his thoughts, he understood that guilt better than anyone. He took a deep breath, relaxing his shaking hands, before opening the door.

San sat on his bed with a pen in his hand. The green notebook was opened to the next blank page, waiting for something to be written. His hand with the pen shook slightly, and his face was filled with silent tears pouring from his eyes. He looked like he had been crying for hours.

Immediately, Seonghwa rushed over to him, embracing San as tightly as possible. San let out a quiet cry as he allowed himself to just be held by his brother's comforting arms. They held onto one another for a few minutes, until San finally calmed down, tears no longer streaming down his face. Seonghwa sat down on San's bed, holding San's face in his hands.

"I can't find him," San whispered defeatedly. He felt embarrassed showing this side of himself to Seonghwa, even though he knew he shouldn't. After Seonghwa was reunited with his brothers weeks ago, the one thing he always made sure to tell them was that they should never have to hide their pain. He didn't want his brothers to end up like him, fearful of showing weakness in front of others. Seonghwa was working on his fear, but he knew that he could never fully get over it. Living with it would be awful, but bearable. He wiped the stray tear away on San's cheek.

"It's okay, San. It's not your fault at all. I understand it may be hard to truly believe this, but I need you to know that it really isn't your fault," Seonghwa said in a calming voice. San nodded, trying his best to control his breathing. He wanted to be strong. Seonghwa now held San's hands in both of his.

"Jongho did tell me something before I lost contact," San said once he fully calmed down. Seonghwa's eyes widened, not expecting San to have any more information on Jongho.

"What did he tell you?" he asked, situating himself so he could completely comprehend San's answer.

"He told me that mountain isn't going to be erupting, it's something else that the government is hiding. Also, the boy he met is from a place called Caelum... is that in a different country?" San responded. Seonghwa, instead of verbally responding, immediately stood up and walked over to everyone in the living room, dragging San behind him with their hands still intertwined.

The five pairs of eyes instantly looked to them when hearing San's door slam open. The hopelessness was still evident on their faces, but a confusion was now there as well. Seonghwa's smiling face wasn't what they expected to see.

"I have a plan."

---

A loud knocking could be heard on the front door of Hyunjin's best friend's house. This was Hyunjin's last attempt, he knew that the government would be looking for him by now. He felt he had no other choice.