Moving on

Chapter 1

For the next next few days I was fine not good not bad but alive and fine . I was kind of in shock and forgot often . I think I have left about a hundred messages to him . His mam finally texted me back to go live my life and not live in my past with him . That's when it finally hit me ,the reality that he would never be coming back ever . Even though it was still summer I started to never go out with my friends , or outside in general . I only left my room to eat food or drink hot chocolate , but no matter how much hot chocolate I drank it would still not warm up the cold feeling in my chest . I went to bed thinking about him and always woke up with a wet pillow . I started living through the internet just looking at people's posts looking at old pictures of him . Before puberty he wasn't very good looking I had still liked him even though he went to the private school and I went to the public school. Once he gained his looks he had everything a girlfriend , designer clothes and enough money to basically save Africa . But no only my parents could be charity workers , not much money in it but they are happy . When we finally got together we where both happier than we had ever been with anyone else ever , he became my life my soul . Even after about a week after I still have a cold empty feeling in my heart . No amount of Taylor Swift songs can make that feeling go away we will never , ever , ever be together for ever . The girls where nice and supportive and keep inviting me to go shopping go to the cinema or whatever . Although they are really nice to offer I don't feel like going anywhere but the bathroom , the kitchen and back. Paige who is my neighbour checks in on me even though I don't feel she needs to . My mam is trying very hard to draw me from my room bribing me with food it's having a large affect on my brother he is getting bigger and bigger each and every day. . Today she is cooking her famous brownies , the smell which has wafted its way up to my room I haven't teen since last night , it's two in the afternoon and I hadn't noticed how hungry I was I started walking down the stairs . When I got downstairs my mam was so delighted to have me down that it wasn't long until I had the biggest bowl of warm brownies and ice cream that I had ever seen in front of me I started eat it made me feel better even if it was only temporary . My brother then strolled into the room he had grown by about half I'd say . At the sight of him I burst out laughing at the noise of my laughter he fell to the floor which of corse made me laugh more . When he got up it was quite obvious he had ripped his used to be baggy now skinny jeans . He covered the hole with his hands and ran to his. Room he's nineteen he's called David he has short brown hair and dark blue eyes he used to have a toned body ,but now he has the fattest thighs and double chin he has ever had even when he was a ten pound baby . I'm seventeen by the way I have shoulder length light brown hair with light blue eyes my name is Amy . After my brownies I go to watch TV even though I know there is nothing on I will relate to . On TV there is always just happy people in relationships and doing stuff no one cares about . I start whatch ing the discovery channel because it feels good to know what's going on around me . That's when my phone bleeped it was Zeke inviting me to go see big hero six with him , I asked him why a kids movie and he just replied he was just trying to be my hero by distracting me . I dented him back sure , what was I going to do on my own all day . I went upstairs and had a shower for the first time in a week and brushed my hair it felt good to be clean . I then got dressed into a nice black tee and jeans I was putting on my shoes when I shouted up the stairs to my Mam "going to the cinema with Zeke " she then made the loudest sigh of relief I think I have ever heard then she added " do you want a tender " I took the money even though I already had money in my back pocket I said my goodbyes and when tout the door . There Zeke was with his old banger waiting for me .