Finding Heathcliff

Thirty-Three

Astrid accepted Azrael's hand, but she wasn't in the mood to talk this time. Her mind was too agitated after what had passed between her and Orion; she couldn't decide what she wanted to ask the fallen angel and form suitable questions.

Azrael respected her pensive silence and they descended the stairs for what must have been hours wordlessly, listening to the murmur of conversations of the men walking behind them, noticing how the weak daylight within the pit faded gradually the deeper they went, making Astrid wonder for how long they could keep walking without torches, until they reached another stone platform. Even here, an entrance to a cave opened in the rock wall, a cave much bigger than the previous one, Astrid realised when Azrael led her inside.

The long, flat stretch of semi-darkness seemed to be more of a passage than a cave. After a while, when her eyes adjusted to the new shade of gloom, Astrid perceived a faint luminescence emanating from a source hidden somewhere deep within, causing the black walls glow sufficiently for them to walk without stumbling. Unexpectedly, a shadow blacker than the tenebrosity filling the passage separated itself from one of the distant walls, startling Astrid.

"You don't need to be afraid of them. They are friends," Azrael said upon hearing the hitch in her breathing, squeezing her hand tighter in his.

"Who are they?" she asked, voice hoarse after the long disuse.

"These people, mostly humans of angel descent, are hiding here from the demons ruling your country and the world, Lady."

Astrid looked up at him, trying to read his eyes, but it was too dark.

"You called Orion a demon before," she muttered.

"That's what he is. Like your uncle. And you would be too, if Arcturus' brother and his wife had really been your parents."

Astrid saw him shake his head as if he himself couldn't believe what he was telling her. Then, before he spoke again, the fingers of his free hand pulled gently at the platinum strand in her hair, finding it unmistakably despite the semi-darkness. "But they couldn't have been. There's more angel in you than in any of the humans of angel descent I've met in centuries."

Centuries... The word echoed in her mind, a piece of information momentarily more important than the other things he had said. Centuries... She was sixteen. This fallen angel was... centuries old. Her parents were not her parents. Orion was... a demon... But it couldn't be, the fallen angels were demons, that's what she had read in her book...

"I don't understand," Astrid whispered, feeling close to tears again. Was he telling her the truth? Or was he lying to her like everyone else?

"It might take time, but it will all become clear. I'm not lying to you, I never will," he said softly, letting his hand, which was still tangled in her hair, drop to her cheek, his fingers brushing off a couple of tears she had not felt escaping her eyes, wishing not to feel compelled to touch her upon the tiniest opportunity. "I'll tell you more only when you are ready to accept it."

"Just one more thing," Azrael added as they reached a spot where the dark corridor opened into a cave bathed in trembling, golden light. "I suggest that you leave your fiancé here with his guards before we move on tomorrow. His intentions are not pure. I feel that... he might try to remove you from his path, should you stand between him and the throne. Your uncle might have promised to make him his heir even if he returns without you-- his will to rule is apparent and easy to exploit. He'll ki... harm you, Lady, if you won't do what he wants and he won't even think it's wrong, they, demons, can justify all evils."

"No! "Astrid gasped, stopping in her tracks. Azrael's words sounded like a cold accusation without any proof to her. "I don't believe you, Orion is my friend." She let go of his hand, taking a step away from him and shaking her head vigorously even as she heard him sigh.

Azrael had not properly realised until that moment how very young and fragile, inexperienced and vulnerable she was. Or maybe he had, but getting to know her up close, having the privilege of reading her wonderfully pure mind, was making him feel old and sinful, and unworthy of the feelings she seemed to hold for him. He wished that her demon really deserved her and loved her. Everything would be so much simpler if he did; Azrael could deal with his own feelings if he knew that she was safe and happy.

"All right, forget about it," he muttered, not wanting to hurt her deeper by insisting. He would watch the demon closely and keep her safe.

I told you, Ramiel thought as he walked past them, reaching the cave first. The boy Rigel believed me when I told him about the queenie's fiancé though, and even if the demon comes to Oblivis with us, there's three of us to keep an eye on the girl.

Thank you, Ramiel, Azrael thought, remaining next to Astrid, who seemed frozen with shock, until Orion reached them. He motioned for the demon to lead the girl towards Ramiel, who was a few steps ahead, while he waited for the rest of the men and shepherded them all into the cave.

Astrid looked at Azrael once before she followed Orion, his words reverberating in her mind, amplified and distorted, not making sense, and yet not as shocking as she was trying to convince herself. They felt like a memory of something that had crossed her mind before, but she could not name it then... they screamed at her about that strange, cold determination she had felt around Orion since the night when she had found that gun in his luggage. Had he allowed her to find it on purpose, had it been a warning?

But how could Azrael know so much? He had said that he couldn't read Orion's mind as well as hers... Astrid sighed, preceding Orion and Rigel into the vast cave, too confused and exhausted to marvel at the line of electric lights illuminating the perimeter of the room. She could gather a lot about people and their intentions even without being able to get glimpses of their thoughts like Azrael. And yet, what if the fallen angel was lying? What if her book was right?

Astrid was forced to lock eyes with him when she felt his intense gaze on her, finding him watching her from across the cave where he stood with his friend now, and a stranger-- a dark-clad man who did not belong to their group.

Later, Lady. His thoughts reached her mind, strangely soothing, making her realise that she started to regard their absence as an alien and unwelcome feeling. You only need to ask, I won't lie.

Nodding slightly in reply, Astrid allowed Orion to take her by her arm and lead her forward; her feet, after descending the uncountable stairs, were too tired to obey the orders of her mind, but she had to move, everyone else had preceded them by now, and stood waiting for her and Orion to catch up before moving on.

She offered Azrael a small smile as she approached him. Despite everything he had told her, Astrid found herself unable not to trust him; she could feel that he believed what he had said. But there was a chance that he was mistaken. Orion would never try to take her life, even if it might have crossed his mind. He wasn't evil; they had been taught to look out for each other, knew that they would marry one day...

Her thoughts scattered, hit by a wave of silent anger emanating from Orion when she accepted Azrael's outstretched hand again without thinking.

The gesture had already become so natural as if this was something she was born to do-- holding the angel's hand, walking through her life with him at her side. She blushed, recalling how awkward these things had felt with Orion when they had reached the age of holding hands and first kisses, despite their having known each other forever. And now, this man she knew nothing about was making her feel like Orion never had... Was it right, or was it wrong?

Was everything that she was feeling for Orion only a result of habit and expectation and a lack of choice? Suddenly, she felt like one of the characters in Wuthering Heights. None of them had been given a choice, none but Cathy who didn't deserve it, whose selfishness destroyed Heathcliff...

Astrid shook the thoughts from her head when she felt Azrael's look heating up her cheeks, then tried to force herself to focus, failing quickly, when he introduced her to the new man, who came to welcome the group of travellers in the name of the community living down here.

She was tired and hungry, she was dying to take a bath and lay down to sleep...

Soon, Lady, she heard Azrael's words in her mind and smiled when she realised that he sounded bemused... and was it relief and a hint of happiness that brightened up his voice?