flower. || L.S

15. and we danced all night to the best song ever

Louis's pov

it's the night of the big dance and i'm beyond excited. freddie harry and steve are getting ready in harry's room meanwhile me and martha are getting ready in mine we all drove like an hour a few days ago to the mall to get fancy clothes for the big dance and it was super fun

harry doesn't know what i'm wearing neither do i know what he's wearing. i haven't really shown my fem side to harry i think ever? so i'm pretty nervous about that

i'm doing martha's hair because since she found out i'm the one who made harry's hair alive yet she's been begging me to do hers

"okay darling you're all done you look beautiful!" i smile softly at her and she giggles "steve is gonna die!" i smile at her and we dance around to the music playing for a little bit before i glance at myself in the mirror

i don't like how this dress makes my body look. i don't like how it's extra tight around my belly. it's just ew.

"hey what's wrong." i snap out of my thoughts and shake my head. "no no nothing are the boys there yet?"  she nods

"they're waiting and steve said and i quote 'harry has been pacing and day dreaming about louis so much that freddie made up a rule that whenever he catches harry staring off into the distance making those love eyes he's gonna draw a mark on his hand. so far they're 28.' he's so gone for you it's so cute!" she squeals and i smile and blush. "he technically hasn't asked me to be his boyfriend yet so" i shrug and she rolls her eyes

"well i have to go since im actually running this thing so i'll meet you there babe you look lovely!" she kisses my cheek and walks out and i look at myself in the mirror again

have my shoulders always looked like that? why're my thighs so wide? i need a closer look this can't be the way i actually look. i take off my dress stare at myself. god how could anyone ever love me? how do people see me like this everyday and not say anything? how did he like me? does he even like me? how could he look at me and call me beautiful? those stupid fucking scars on my thighs how did he kiss them? how did he love them..? why did he love them? if i can't love them myself how does he? if i look like this he will never like me. i regret ever taking off my shirt infront of him i regret letting him see me like this he's gonna snap out of and realize how fucking ugly i am soon enough and i mean he's not fucking wrong i mean he's gorgeous he's in his twenties he's got good body good with kids super kind respectful i've hit him multiple times and he's still here. why would he want a fat sack of shit with a kid? what made him want me? i don't think he even does. i mean it's not only the looks it's also the fucking mind set oh i'm struggling with a cigarette addiction oh no i self harm too oh now i'm a jealous freak who's jealous of his own sons mother oh no now i hate how i look and i'll whine about it god i'm such a fucking pick me. i stare down at the scars. i told harry i'm not gonna do it and i'm not gonna do it. i told harry i'm not gonna do it so i'm not gonna do it. i promised harry. i can't break the promise.

                                      🐢🐢
Harry's pov

the parents are rolling in and everyone seems to be having fun and shit. woo super fun where the fuck is louis. i start to get nervous what if he doesn't want to come with me anymore what if he thinks it's too awkward to tell me after all that and he just doesn't want to reject me.

he's not answering my texts. i'm gonna start crying. i walk over to martha. "louis was getting ready right? like he was actually coming?" i ask her and she frowns

"is he not here yet he was already dressed and everything. maybe something happened." she frowns and i nod "watch freddie i'm gonna go check on him."

i rush to the cabins and knock on his door. "my love? i-it's me are you okay?" i say the nervousness is showing through my shaky voice

"i'm alright you can come in." he says his voice seems groggy not morning groggy but like crying?

i walk and see him with a hoodie on on his bed with a book it looks like. he is crying.

"baby oh my god what happened martha said you were dressed when she left. i thought you ditched me" i rush to his side holding him to my chest he shakes his head "no no god no. i just- it all got too much for me? i think you know by now that i have a lot of issues it keeps getting worse for you every 2 seconds you find out i'm struggling with something that'll make me more hard to take care of. so why bother harry? why? why are you doing all of this for? for a shag cus i have a big arse by all means fuck me. right now. just don't get yourself mixed up with this whole mess. it's not worth it you have such good opportunities and you have a long hopeful life to live dude i'm clocked out. and plus look at me. how could you just look at me and think 'oh yeah he's hot' have you seriously ever looked at me? saw how fat my thighs are or how my shoulders look have you seen how i look in tight clothes no because i never let you because if you did you would find me disgusting." my face drops he thinks he's too fucked for me to actually love him.

"you think i did all of this. what i've been doing for the past what 2 weeks? is for a shag. louis i can't believe you've actually convinced yourself of such stupidity. i am inlove with you. believe it or not louis i am. i'm inlove with you and i don't give a single fuck how fucked you think you are i am inlove with you and all i will ever do if you allow me of course is love and cherish all your flaws. i will try to help as much as i bloody can you are the most beautiful caring loving person i've ever fucking met. and i think it's your turn to be loved and cared for lou. i have actually seen you. i've spent these past few weeks staring at you admiring you making scenarios before bed dreaming about you. you are the man of my dreams problems and all. i find you beautiful. beautiful in a way that is very rare in people i call you flower because you've spent your entire life getting picked and picked and picked i want to be the one to put you in the vase put you in the middle of my dining table to show everyone how beautiful my flower is how astonishing you are louis. it's cringey yes but it's how i feel. now get that beautiful dress on put on your beautiful make up and meet me at the party." i grab his face and kiss him. "please." i whisper as i walk out god i really fucking hope he's actually getting ready

i walk down to the party and freddie runs up to me "is dad okay?" i nod "yes baby his dress just needed to be zipped properly." i don't like lying but it feels better than "oh don't worry your dad was just having a breakdown upstairs."

                                    🐢🐢

it's been a little while i drank a lot of fucking fruit punch "daddy!" freddie shouts and i look over and i literally drop my cup like the movies he's wearing this beautiful baby blue dress that matches his beautiful eyes. he has his makeup done all pretty. dude. i cannot get any luckier look at the man he is so fucking fine oh my god

i walk over to him and take his hands in mine. "i cannot find the words to describe your beauty louis tomlinson." i kiss his hands "you are the prettiest creature to ever walk this earth." he blushes and kisses me. did i mention he tastes really fucking good.

"i'm inlove with you too. you didn't give me a chance to say it. but i am. thank you for your patience with me. thank you for your kindness. thank you. i love you. i really do." i smile softly and hold him close to me.

we dance all night and just have stupid fun. it's like nothing ever happened just me and my beautiful angel. the prettiest flower boy.

the end

a/n i really wanna write an epilogue but if i don't they lived happily ever after.