Part 40 | PlayFor the rest of the night, Anya allows herself to drown in her misery, allows herself to weep over the demon, after what they just shared, and that finally sleeping with him didn't give her the satisfaction she was hoping for.
On the contrary, it made it worse. Not because she's yearning to sleep with him again—even though she is, much too soon after it happened—but because she feels so lost and so lonely.
In the end all she really wanted was for him to hold her, cuddle her. The awesome sex was just an empty replacement for the emotional intimacy he's not able to give her. And once again she can't be mad at him, this is not his fault, she knew this is all he can give her, knew this is all she gets. Though, she didn't expect to get hit so hard by this realization.
She wonders what went through Kyun's mind once they were done. Did he regret sleeping with her? Was it like what she felt so often after a casual night with a random person: a mixture of shame and guilt?
Anya wishes he would look back on this and see things the way she does. She hopes this night with her was as special for him as it was for her—even if that won't change a thing.
The next day Anya feels better. She forces herself to get her head out of her ass and move on.
She has to.
And she's excited for today. Excited to see Joo. As bad as she feels about this thing with Kyun, the moment she sees Joo, she feels better. That's what he always does. He makes her feel good.
"You look pretty tonight!" Joo smiles as they sit in the Korean restaurant and enjoy their dinner.
It's a different restaurant than yesterday. It's way fancier and Joo is wearing a sexy black suit and tie, his hair slicked back, his face decorated with a charming smile.
"You too!" Smiling, she looks at him for a long moment. It's actually a crime how good he looks tonight.
He takes a bite of his food and nods over to her. "I like that necklace!"
Anya's heart sinks into her gut. She's been wearing this necklace ever since Kyun gave it to her. It's a part of her now. A part she almost forgot. She's been wearing this necklace every time she's met Joo. Why out of all days does he have to mention it now?
"Thanks!" She takes a deep breath, tries to keep her cool. "It was a gift..."
Joo smirks and tilts his head. "Whoever gave it to you seems to know you well, it really suits you!"
Wow, this man really knows how to hit where it hurts the most. But he speaks those words so casually that Anya knows he actually means them. It's almost painful how innocent his mind is...
For hours they sit together and since Joo doesn't mention her necklace or anything Kyun-related again, she manages to relax, have fun. As always, it feels so good being with Joo. So insanely good. A different kind of good than with the demon.
"Can I ask you something?" he suddenly asks after the waiter put the dessert between them.
Completely smitten by the sweet taste of this mochi ice, she nods. "Sure!"
"Why me?"
With furrowed brows, she tilts her head. "What do you mean?"
Joo puts down his spoon and sighs, seeming to search for a way to phrase his thoughts. And this makes her nervous...
"You never have dates," he explains. "You never see men... why me? Don't get me wrong, I feel flattered but I can't help being nervous about the fact that after all these years you chose to go on a date... with me..."
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Deadly Sins | Monsta X
FanfictionWould you sacrifice fifty souls to save your own? Selling her soul to Changkyun, a Crossroad Demon, at the age of sixteen to save her beloved boyfriend's life seemed to be the absolute right thing for Anya to do at the time. But when the time come...