My Boyfriend's Back

Thirty-Eight

YN

I watched Stu interact with Reese. She was warming up to him more and more. He helped her with breakfast and then lunch. And now it was time for a nap. He insisted on being the one to put her to bed and she didn't seem to mind. Her little arms wrapped around his neck and she snuggled into him. "You know what? How about we both take a nap on the couch? Hmm? Wanna take a nap with daddy?"

She looked up at him then looked over his shoulder at me and I nodded. She nodded her head in response to him and he sat down on the couch with her, slowly laying flat on his back after adjusting the throw pillows. As soon as she was settled and comfortable she fell asleep. I needed to get some air. I felt like I couldn't breathe. I walked around the counter where I had been standing and walked out the back door.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I know I shouldn't let it happen. I know I shouldn't allow him to be near her. He's a goddamn psychopath. He's killed people. But how can I keep her from him? He wants to be in her life and  that counts for something right? And she's already growing attached to him. She might be too young to express how she feels, but there is no doubt in my mind that she knows who he is. It didn't take more than five minutes for her to warm up to him this morning.

Then there's me…who is still so deeply in love with a man that it almost blocks out what he's done. Almost. It blocks it out the moment he kisses me, but comes rushing back and slamming into me like a freight train after he pulls away. It was a constant reminder of what happened. My head was telling me to do the logical thing and run, call the police, and tell them I know where they can find him. But my heart…my heart was telling me he was still the same Stu I've always known.

I know the people in my life aren't stupid. I know they know Stu is the father. Who else would it be? Reese looks like him which makes it hard to deny that he's her father. They've never asked questions which I'm grateful for. But it also makes me worry. If they know then others will too. And if Stu is here then that only has to mean one thing, right? He has something planned. Randy, Sidney, Gale, and Dewey are all still alive. His plan failed.

"What're doing?" I jumped, spinning around to see Stu standing at the back door. "Jesus fuck. You are way too quiet. I needed to get some air." I looked around him to see inside the house. "She's fine. She's sound asleep. Are you okay?" I nodded my head. "Mm hmm." He gave me a look that told me he knew I was full of shit. I turned back around and looked into the woods behind the house.

"She's going to get attached to you," I said. He hummed and came to stand beside me, leaving the door open. "And that's a problem?" He asked. Was it? Is it such a big deal for her to know him and get attached? The answer should be yes, right? Because he's a fucking murderous psychopath. Because he can't really be here all the time, not with him being on the lam for the past four years.

"I wanna say it is…it is a problem," I said. I turned towards him. "You have been on the run from the police for four years, Stu. You've been on the run because you're fucking unhinged and dangerous. You've killed people. I don't want my–our daughter to grow up without her mother. I don't want her to ever have to walk into a room and find me lifeless and see the walls splattered in blood. I don't want her to know what it's like to live in fear all the time. I don't want her to have fucking ptsd and anxiety every time the phone rings."

I could tell by the tick of his jaw he was angry. That he wanted to lash out but he didn't, he stood there and stayed quiet while I finished. "It can't be good that you're here. I know you have a plan and don't say you don't. The people who wanted to die are still alive. I know as soon as you leave here someone is either going to be attacked or they're going to die."I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

"But…I know I can't keep her from you. And a part of me doesn't want her to grow up not knowing you. I don't want to explain to her when she's old why she doesn't have a daddy. And I don't want someone else trying to take that role." His hand grabbed a hold of my wrist and he pulled me closer to him. "If I ever see another man trying to be her father he will fucking die." His grip on my wrist tightened, making me hiss.

"You're…hurting…me." He let go and stepped back. "Do you not fucking listen? This is what I'm talking about, Stu. Your first instinct is to hurt people. I don't want my daughter growing up around that shit. Like I said I can't keep you from her. I'm not stupid. I know you'll never leave me alone. The only way I'll ever not have to worry about you is if you're dead." A smile slowly started to grow on his face and that made me nervous and kind of scared.

"Not even then, baby. You'll always have to worry about where I am and if I'm coming to get you." He took a step towards me and I took one back. "I'm going to spend a few more hours with her and then I have to go. I have plans." He pulled me into him and it took a second to register that he had moved close enough to grab me because I was too busy thinking about running back into the house and locking the doors.

"I think we have some time to have a little…" he didn't get to finish before a small voice called for me. "Mama!" Stu leaned down and kissed me then walked back inside. "Hey, baby girl. What're you doing up? Hmm?" I turned around and walked back into the house to see Stu picking her up. I walked up behind him and smiled at her. "Mama." Stu turned around, placing her on his side. "Hi, baby." I kissed her forehead and took her from him.

"What're you doing up?" I asked, walking into the kitchen. She tried to do her best to say juice and pointed to the fridge. "Juice?" She smiled and nodded her little head. "Maybe…maybe daddy will get it for you." I looked up at Stu who still had a smile plastered on his face. She looked up at him with her big blue eyes and I swear the man melted. She already had him wrapped around her little finger.