Oppenheimer

Part 34

CILLIAN'S POV

On the evening he stormed off, Cillian immediately made his way to the nearest pub before calling his friend Enda who didn't arrive at the Donoghue Tavern until Cillian was well and truly drunk.

When Enda walked through the door of the small and, thankfully, empty pub he found Cillian nursing his beer.

He knew that he had only been there for a short bit, but his mind was clearly working overtime and so was his liver. Something was wrong and that is why he was there, on his own, filling himself up on Guinness.

Intrusive voices raged in his head and more and more unreasonable thoughts were building up to near uncontrollable levels.

The bartender kept feeding him drinks, and he drank them quickly.

"Jesus Christ Cills, how many pints of Guinness did you have?" Enda asked somewhat concerned as he sat down next to his friend. His eyes were glassy and he sighed deeply.

"Not enough" Cillian responded before ordering another round but Enda was quick to cut him off.

"No more for you mate. Do you want to tell me what's wrong?" he asked and Cillian sighed again before his eyes teared up.

"Y/N is pregnant" Cillian told his friend whose chin dropped pretty much instantly.

"And, going by your reaction, the pregnancy wasn't planned I assume..." Enda observed after having digested the news.

"Of course it wasn't planned" Cillian hissed before breaking down emotionally. "I can't go through this again Enda. Fuck. I just can't" he told him and Enda rested a hand on Cillian's shoulder.

"Do you love her?" Enda asked carefully.

"Of course I fucking love her. I was going to propose to her in France. But, this changes everything" Cillian pointed out but Enda wouldn't accept this kind of excuse from him.

"It changes nothing mate. You need to get over what happened with your ex. She was a fucking lunatic and what she did has nothing to do with Y/N. If you love her, marry her. If you don't love her, leave her but be there for her and your child. It is that simple" Enda pointed out but Cillian was tearing up inside, reliving the nightmares he had been put through by his sons' mother. The constant lies, the heartache and the fact that their lives revolved around their children and one pregnancy lie after another.

He couldn't deal with it nor could he address what was happening to you. It was overwhelming and he didn't know what he to do. He needed to think, hard and fast and there was no better place to do that than Enda's house.

Enda had always been there for him. He was the voice of reason for Cillian, especially when he filed for divorce from his ex-wife. He knew what happened between them and he knew that his friend was still hurt by it. It was something he needed to let go and he had to do so pretty fast now that you were pregnant.

YOUR POV

Just as you were packing your clothes on the following day after Cillian hadn't come home for the night and after you had told Max that you were leaving, Max tried to convince you to stay. He didn't want you to break up with his father, nor did he want you to return to LA and give up your life in London.

'This is my mother's fault' Max blurted out, not thinking straight and, just as he said that, you looked up at him from where you were sitting.

'What?' you asked somewhat confused.

'That's why dad reacted the way he did, I think' Max said and you realised that his mind was clearly working way too hard right now.

'Max, I don't know what this is about but I don't think that your mother has anything to do with your dad storming out on me' you pointed out, thinking that he was being sweet but also unreasonable.

'Actually, she does. She did something terrible to him' Max began to stammer and your eyes widened.

You couldn't help but query what he was saying but Max became rather reluctant to talk about it now. He had second thoughts.

'I wasn't meant to know about it but I read the court documents for their settlement and the custody arrangements for Charlie. If I tell you, you cannot tell Charlie' Max hesitated.

'Max, these documents would have been sealed and for your father's eyes only. There is a reason he didn't involve you guys in the proceedings' you pointed out, even though you didn't know what the documents were saying. You never involved yourself in Cillian's business with his ex.

'Did you never wonder why mum allowed Charlie to live with dad?' Max asked you while sitting down next to you.

'She had a change of heart?' you guessed.

'No, the court made her give up custody' Max began before telling you what she did.

According to Max, his mother fell pregnant again after she had Charlie. He was about seven years old at the time and both of his parents worked hard to keep their marriage floating along for the sake of their children. They were constantly fighting but, with the pregnancy, things had changed again for the better. It was leverage for his mother and she used that leverage well because Cillian adored his children over everything. After all, he had married her after a non-serious on and off relationship for two years when he found out that she was pregnant with Max and, with that, she knew that, a third child would make him stay with her. It was going to strengthen the relationship they had.

Unfortunately though, she lost the baby and things slowly returned how they were, namely miserable. This was, at least, until she was pregnant again even though they both agreed not to have children.

This time, however, the pregnancy wasn't real, nor was the miscarriage that followed. She faked it all, simply to make Cillian stay and then, she did it again for a second time which is when, finally, Cillian found out.

Hearing Max tell you these stories made you feel ill, but they didn't make you change your mind.

"I am terribly sorry that this happened but I am really hurt Max. Your father really hurt me with what he said to me and I am not going to change my mind" you said with a heavy heart before packing up the last of your things.

"Y/N, please! Give him one last chance to make this right. I know he loves you and he will be a good father" Max said but you couldn't bring yourself to forgive Cillian.

At the very least, you needed to hear it from him. He needed to give you a reason to stay and to forgive you. It was your time to leave now and you were determined to do it.