Apricity//Jungkook fanfiction//

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲

⊰᯽⊱┈──╌❊ - ❊╌──┈⊰᯽⊱

          Groaning, Jungkook rubs his tired eyes, feeling the light touch of the January sun caressing his right cheek. He has no idea how much he slept, but it feels like he could still lay under the blanket for a few good hours. It feels too early. However, as exhausted as he is, he sits up, running his hands through his hair and yawning before he steals a glance of the empty space beside him. The pillow is flat and the white bed sheets are wrinkled in the place where Y/n probably went to sleep last night. He doesn't recognize the bed or the other pieces of furniture in the room or the room itself. He frowns as he tries to remember where he is right now. For a few moments, nothing happens and he forces himself to remember how he ended up in this unknown place. Naked. A flood of memories from yesterday crash inside his brain and his head explodes in pain as he hisses. He remembers going to his grandfather's funeral, talking with his weird cousin and trying to escape the gang that chased him. And, suddenly, it hits him. Y/n. She was in danger yesterday. What if she is in danger again?
          Jumping out of bed, Jungkook pulls the black boxers up his thighs and ignores the sting when the elastic waistband hits against his skin. He throws glances left and right, searching for his clothes, but can't find them and, instead, he notices Y/n's purse on the nightstand. Sighing, he massages the back of his neck. Of course, Y/n is still in the hotel room. Nothing happened to her. She's safe. Scoffing, he lifts his gaze and stretches his hands upwards, moaning when his back cracks. He rubs his eyes again and notices the door of the bathroom open ajar. Smiling, he walks towards it slowly, slapping himself mentally. He is too much of an overthinker. It's clearly too early in the morning. He needs more sleep.
          Clearing his throat, he pushes the bathroom door open without knocking and expects to find Y/n in the shower, but, to his surprise, there is no shower cabin. There is only a bathtub, placed near a wall with unevenly laid tiles and, from Jungkook's angle, it seems like nobody is using it. No trace of Y/n inside the bathroom either. With his pulse increasing slowly, he calls her name. "Y/n!" — his voice trembles at the thought of her being in danger again. Clearing his throat, he takes a step towards the bathtub and calls her name again, this time louder. "Y/n-" — he says, but her name gets stuck in his throat when he notices that she is actually in the bathtub. Hugging her knees, her face is underwater as her hair floats around her naked body and she looks frozen in time. She doesn't even seem to breathe.
          With his heart clenching inside his chest, Jungkook runs towards her, his bare feet slipping on the cheap fake marble, but he eventually reaches the bathtub and grabs the edge, whispering Y/n's name breathlessly. "Y/n! You alright?" — he asks a bit louder and places his hand on her shoulder.
          Right at that very moment, his heart almost rips through his chest when Y/n gasps and raises her head above the warm water. With water running down her face, she gasps again and Jungkook laughs out loud nervously as he grabs a towel and hands it to her. "Shit, Jungkook! You scared me." — yells Y/n as she wipes her face with the towel. Jungkook scoffs and crouches beside her. "No. You scared me. I thought you drowned." — he corrects her and scoffs again, massaging his heart as he tries to calm down his hammering heartbeat. Y/n scoffs too and the droplets of water which had gathered in her hair frame her face, highlighting the gleam inside her eyes. For a mere moment, Jungkook gets lost inside her gaze and he feels his pulse increasing again. However, this time he isn't panicking. He's feeling another type of feeling. A feeling he could kill for.
          Placing a wet strand of hair behind her ear, Jungkook sighs. "I really thought something happened to you." — he says, letting a crumble of worry glint inside his voice. Looking away, Y/n embraces herself and Jungkook notices her skin contrasting with the black ink of her tattoos. It's glistening under the traces left behind by the droplets of water. However, he notices something else on her body. Something which makes his smile drop and he clenches his jaw as he jerks her right arm towards him. Observing the cigarette burn mark on her arm, he feels his anger transforming into something darker, boiling underneath his skin. So, he talks through gritted teeth. "Who did this to you? Which one of those bastards did this to-" — he asks as he becomes angrier with every word. "It doesn't matter." — answers Y/n and Jungkook grabs her chin gently, turning her head towards him and making her look into his eyes. "Yes, it does matter." — he answers in a calmer voice, but clenches his jaw again before he talks. "I'm hunting that son of a bitch down and killing him with my bare hands." — he makes a promise as darkness takes over the beautiful color of his eyes.
          Y/n gulps. Grabbing his hand, she kisses the back of it maybe for way too long. "Do you want to stain these beautiful hands with blood?" — she asks, holding back from showing a childish pout. "It wouldn't be the first time." — Jungkook admits as he looks away and Y/n raises her eyebrows. "You killed someone before?" — she asks curiously, but something inside her stomach writhes, not really wanting to know the answer. "No. I stopped on time." — he admits and scoffs right after. "Would you look at me differently if I was a killer?" — he asks, but his voice doesn't sound that tense anymore. It sounds pretty playful. And the question burns inside his eyes like embers until Y/n gives her answer. Smirking, she turns his hand upside down and draws circles in his palm. "What if I say no?" — she answers innocently and she's sure that she doesn't understand the full meaning of his question. She can't feel the heaviness of the words. Not now, at least.
          "Then..." — Jungkook starts his reply and his eyes fall on the tattoo which stands out on her right shoulder. "I guess you really are fearless."
          Slamming his palms against the wooden surface of his desk, Jungkook's father lets out a frustrated sigh. "Where is he?" — he yells and the man that stands in front of him flinches. Iseul, his assistant, clears his throat and speaks in a rather trembling voice as his stare burns through the floor two inches in front of his polished shoes. "We are looking into it, Sir. All we know is that he left with a woman." — he gives his answer and refrains from flinching again when his boss scoffs. Clenching his jaw, Jungkook's father talks through gritted teeth. "A woman? What woman?" — he asks. "We're still trying to find out." — the assistant gives his answer and bows his head instead of apologizing. He should have found something by now. But, the truth is that keeping up with Mr. Jeon's youngest son is pretty hard. Iseul tried his best. He looked into millions of files last night, skipped sleep, drank five coffees and still couldn't find a single trace of Jungkook. Keeping his stare glued to the floor, Iseul tells himself that he must dig deeper. He has to find a sign of life at least.
          Nodding, Mr. Jeon stands up. "Hurry up and find everything about that woman. Let me know when you have something. Her eye color, her name, her house, anything! Just find something!" — he orders and Iseul bows as he replies. "Yes, Sir!" — he says and turns around, ready to leave his boss's office as soon as possible. Walking towards the huge window which faces the city, Mr. Jeon exhales. "Find Jungkook and bring him to me. This charade ends right now." — he gives another order before his assistant even has the chance to place his hand on the doorknob and the latter nods as a lump forms inside his throat, making it hard to breathe.
          Splashing his face with ice cold water, Jungkook keeps his eyes closed for a few moments and tries to find himself among all the thoughts that rush through his mind. Humming in the background, Y/n wipes her body with a soft towel and Jungkook visualizes her with his eyes still closed. He imagines the drops of water running down her smooth skin and the strands of wet hair which glue to her forehead and cheeks. The soft smile which persists on her lips as she hums her favourite song and the lively glow in her eyes. He smiles as he realizes the truth which makes his chest feel heavy. He loves her so much. Too much.
          Y/n wraps the towel around her body as she walks towards Jungkook who leans on the sink counter. Unlike her, he's dressed already, the black pants of his suit contrasting with the white shirt that he still didn't close around his wrists. Hugging him from behind, Y/n glues her cheek to the muscles of his back and she feels him relaxing a bit under her touch. However, when her fingers come across the scar above his heart, his muscles become tense again. Y/n caresses the scar through the soft material of the white shirt and places a kiss on the back of his neck. "What do we do now?" — she asks with her eyes closed and waits for a response that she doesn't get for the next few seconds.
          Biting his lower lip, Jungkook digs his nails into the sink counter, feeling pain crawling up his fingers. For a moment, he looks at his reflection in the mirror. And his stare persists on Y/n's thumb brushing on the scar above his heart. One of the many scars he has and one that represents his worst nightmare when it comes to Y/n. Putting her life in danger. That is his worst nightmare. And it is slowly starting to come to life. Among all those happy moments they spent together, there exist tears too. There exists fear and panic. And Jungkook would like to erase those feelings which draw them away from one another. He wants to make them vanish and live only on the bright side. However, he can't do that. Not when his family condemned him to rot in the darkest of places. Alone. Scared. Helpless. Y/n came into his life like a ray of sunshine and she always graced him with her soft and warm touch, but, beside him, she is fading away slowly, consumed by the darkness that suffocates him each and every day.
          So, closing his eyes, he sighs, grabbing Y/n's wrists and moving her hands away from his chest. He turns around to face her and almost winces at the confused expression that she shows. "Yesterday, when we left the gang's hideout. You were right." — he says and Y/n frowns. "What?" — she asks with slight worry glinting inside her stare. Jungkook gulps and tries to hide the stubborn tears that are waiting to roll down his cheeks as his thumbs caress the back of his girl's hands. He can't bring himself to look into her eyes as he pours the ugly truth on the floor of the hotel bathroom. "We have to break up, Y/n." — he states in the steadiest voice he could find within himself and kisses her forehead before he lets go of her hands. Clenching his jaw, he turns around and walks out of the bathroom in a hurry.
          Y/n's brain stops working for a moment and she has to recollect herself when a storm swirls around her the second Jungkook's touch leaves her hands. Inhaling a sharp breath, she feels her chest aching and lunges forward instinctively. Opening the door that Jungkook had just shut behind him, she runs after him. "You're not serious right now." — her voice trembles as she clenches her fingers around the towel that is wrapped around her body. "You are not serious, Jungkook!" — she repeats herself, but he doesn't look at her. He just takes his jacket from the hanger and heads towards the door. "Really?" — she yells behind him as heavy tears burden her lashes. "After all we've been through? That's it?" — she asks through sobs and yells louder as Jungkook opens the front door. "You just leave?"
          Y/n's words break Jungkook's heart like a hammer hitting against glass. But, for their sake, for her sake, he has to leave. With his hand placed on the doorknob, he turns around slightly to face her. "It's better this way." — he says without concentrating too much on the tears that leave traces on her cheeks and leaves the hotel room without closing the door behind him. Maybe he is too selfish. Deep down, he wants Y/n to run after him. To drag him back inside the hotel room. To kiss him. To hit him. To do anything that can stop him from ending their relationship.
          Rushing after him in the hall, Y/n stops a few centimeters away from the door. Tears roll down her cheeks and she can't see in front of her, but she spots Jungkook walking down the hall with heavy steps. And each and every one of his steps leave behind bruises on her heart. "Jungkook, wait!" — she says, but chokes on her words and wants to run after him, but her legs give up on her. Stumbling on her feet, she leans on the wall and whimpers as she scratches her arm on its rigid surface. Jungkook doesn't look back. He keeps on walking away from her. Away from all those dreams and desires which burned between them. Away from that fire which fed their passion. Away from everything that meant the future they pictured together. "Please!" — she whispers breathlessly and returns to the hotel room when Jungkook disappears from her sight. Closing the door, she slides down on it, crying bitter tears which burn her skin. Tears that she never thought she would cry. Ever.
          Shutting the door which leads to the emergency staircase behind him forcefully, Jungkook sighs out all the pain that had gathered inside his throat. His fingers graze his own skin as he grabs his throat, wishing to just cease himself from existing. The cold air of January fills his lungs when he takes a deep breath in and he sighs it out again, his heart hurting this time. What has he done? At the very beginning, when something started to form between them, that first night, when he had the chance to leave, why didn't he just leave? Why did he let himself be so fucking selfish? This woman did nothing to deserve death threats or death itself. At this point, she is just a poor deer lost on a territory filled with bloodthirsty hunters. And what is Jungkook doing? He's pointing a headlight directly at her. Petrifies her in front of the danger. Transforms her into a target.
          Kicking the metal railing which prevents him from falling, Jungkook swears. He hates himself. He hates himself so much. When he thinks about their previous fights, about all those tears that rolled down her cheeks, all those meaningless words which crushed both their hearts and all those make-ups. Those make-ups were history now. Because Jungkook is willing to leave her behind even if that means ripping a part of himself and leaving it with her. He has to do it. Otherwise, things might get out of hand.
          He made a promise to himself. When danger would reach even the tiniest hair on her body, he would walk away. Yet, she could have died in the hands of those gangsters. And he still didn't leave. He stayed the night. It is time to leave now. Leaning on the metal railing, Jungkook notices the Yang tattoo near his left thumb and stares at it for a mere moment before breaking down into tears. He caresses it with his right thumb and sits down on the cold and dirty metal platform which holds him 15 meters above the ground. He leans against the railing and cries. He cries for the dreams he has just shattered. The fire he has just extinguished. The future he has just ruined.