Lights will guide you home and ignite your bones and I will try to fix you

☆9☆

After graduating, with the help of my parents, I bought a loft in London, a little out of the way but well connected. I work at the Ministry, in the Department of Magical Accidents and Disasters, I'm a forgetme. It's nice, quiet work and I still make pretty good money.
To quote my boss, I'm one of those 'people who make sure our secret doesn't get out; Individuals who are the protecter of our magical existence.'I got my paperwork done in a jiffy today and return home pretty early, where I get pretty bored and do all sorts of things that are unnecessary but keep me from gloomy thoughts about certain people. I've just changed my bed when I'm called to an operation.
An elderly lady claims she saw something gnome-like.Nobody believes her that quickly, but she doesn't lie. The gnomes are quite often on the move in London and confuse our fellow human beings who have no idea about the magical world.So I'm on my way and a little later I'm standing in front of a small cozy house. I quickly smooth my anthracite-colored blouse and then ring the lady's bell.
She immediately opens the door for me. "Are you here to take care of this gnome? Nobody wants to believe me!" I tilt my head and smile. "No, madam. I'm here to take your statement so we can work on it. May I come in?” She nods vigorously. "Yes, come!"As soon as the door slammed shut, I pulled out my magic wand and erased her memories of the magical being. Then I'm gone again and Apparate to the Ministry, where I file the case. "Anything else, Carl?" I ask my boss while I'm here. He shakes his head. "No. But thanks Y/n You're always there when it's needed. I'll let you know if there's anything." I nod. I don't want to go straight back home. Sometimes the ceiling falls on my head there because I'm alone and don't have much to do. Then all these thoughts and feelings come up again, which I usually keep under wraps. Only at night do I sometimes allow them to surface again.
Because I need those feelings, those pains, to remind myself that I'm alive and that maybe one day I can do something good with it. After all this time, I haven't taken off his ring for a single second, not to shower, not to sleep.Never.
Even today I sometimes imagine that I can see his silhouette in a crowd. Crazy what the brain creates.
So I wander aimlessly through London and get myself a coffee. It has become one of my favorite drinks. I'm walking across a large, fairly crowded square and suddenly I see these gray eyes. My heart stops for a brief moment, but then it beats sadly on. I've imagined this many times and it's definitely not healthy.I wonder if I'll ever get over him. Can I ever live without him? Will one day come the time when this gaping hole in my life will close again. After I blink and look again, those eyes are still there. Now my heart is beating slowly, almost as if it doesn't dare to really freak out.
I carefully fight my way through the group of people and finally stand in front of him.London is pulsing around us, it's alive, it's racing. Thousands of people stream past us, jostling and shoving, ignoring one another and perhaps missing the chance to make something big out of the rest of their lives. I stare up at him speechless. No doubt it's Draco. He looks a little healthier than he did then, but not nearly as vital as when I met him."Y/n." His voice is just a whisper, but I understand him so perfectly in this noisy, chaotic city, as if we were here alone, as if we were the last people alive.
It takes me several minutes to utter a pathetic "Hey." "I.. what are you doing here?" I finally ask him in surprise when I can think a bit more clearly again."Apparently just a thing," he murmurs and hesitantly takes another step towards me. He strokes my cheek gently, but then lowers his hand like he's not sure if this is okay, if I even want this."Do you have time for me?" I stare at him with wide eyes, time for him?He can have my whole life if he wants it. I nod mechanically. "We can go to my place." A small smile creeps onto Draco's features and my heart blossoms a little.
I missed him so much and it hasn't really gotten into my brain yet that he's standing in front of me in flesh and blood, in the middle of London.
A few seconds later we're sitting next to each other on the couch in my living room and I'm still staring at him like he's a dragon. Or so. I finally blurt out, "I missed you so much." His eyes widen. He looks amazed and surprised, but also relieved."I... did you?" I nod vigorously and feel my eyes burn.
"I love you Draco. You know what? You told me never to stop. Sometimes.. I can also show obedience." He smiles hesitantly. "You're unbelievable." "I think you said that to me a few years ago," I say with a little laugh, and then he kisses me out of the blue. Hungry and somehow emaciated. As if he couldn't wait. Finally he leans his forehead against mine. "I never thought I'd see you again. And that you would hate me. Or forgot me." I shake my head violently. "Never." His gaze falls on my hand and he looks at me with an astonished smile. "You're still wearing the ring?""Of course," I mumble, smiling."I never stopped wearing it. I held on to the fact that something impossible can work.”
"Incredible," he whispers and kisses me again. I can almost feel the hole in my heart tightening, getting smaller and smaller, Draco filling it with his presence and his love. My body is remembering all of this with a good feeling for the first time in years. Finally he looks at me sadly. "How by Merlin's beard can you look me in the eye after all this and not hate me? You've been through hell for me, Y/n. I've done everything you can do to a human being.. and now we're sitting here and one of the first things you tell me is that you love me. How can you say that?" "It's easy," I say firmly. "Because it is the truth. I love you, I've loved you all along. It wasn't your fault, even if you think so. I've always believed in the good in you, that there was something worth fighting for. And what does it matter to go through hell if something good awaits at the end? When the best is waiting there?” Again he shakes his head. With another 'You're amazing' he kisses me. Slowly and tenderly this time, as if we had all the time in the world. And we have.
I eventually pull him up off the couch and follow me to my bedroom and a few hours later my body is calm and my soul rehabilitated. Draco pulls me to his chest and wraps his arms around me tightly. I breathe in his scent, feel his heartbeat under my fingers and it feels like a miracle has happened.
"I can't believe it," I whisper. "You are here." "Shall I tell you something even more incredible?" he asks and I hear the smile in his voice and nod."I will be here. Forever." My heart skips a beat and I crane my head to kiss him.There are many things we need to talk about, but this is not the right time.
He comes when I've satiated myself with his love, his presence, with the security he gives me.