You long to end your life, so you never will die || bnha / bsd

Without shame or pride.

1.

Dazai was, to put it lightly, enjoying the future. One of the best parts was the numerous technological advancements that existed, from fancy large-screened phones to powerful gaming consoles and computers.

Oh, and did he mention that he himself got a phone?

Of course, it was for the crucial parts in life. Dazai used it day and night, doing important research that helped him and Chuuya escape from this world.

And boy oh boy, that research was important. Unfortunately, Chuuya thought differently.

"STOP. PLAYING. VIDEO GAMES. ALL FUCKING DAY."

"But Chibi, it's important research!"

"Shut the hell up. That's the eighteenth time you've said that to me, there's absolutely no way that playing video games is somehow important to our survival."

"Chuuuuuuuuuuuuuyaaaaaaaaaaaaa~"

"No. I'm fucking done with all your nonsense."

It was the second day they were living in the dorms together, and it seemed like Chuuya was already annoyed out of his mind with Dazai's irregular living habits. The two were borrowing clothes from the school, so although they usually wore their usual outfits, you could sometimes catch one of them in casual clothes.

"Can you stop hogging the couch?? Can you also wash the damn dishes ??"

"I'm doing important stuff."

Chuuya simply watched as Dazai's screen lit up with colors, and bright music played. Dazai tapped on his screen, biting his lip and focusing his attention on a small little pixelated icon. After a few moments, he let out a high-pitched wail and flopped over onto a pillow.

"Awww, I died."

"Can you be fucking responsible for once?"

"What do you want me to do?"

"I don't know, maybe clean all of your fucking mess? "

"But moooooom,"

"What the hell did you call me?"

"Mommy. Mother. Mum. Mama. Female parent. One who hath birthed m—"

"Fucking— can you just stop with all your bullshit?"

"Why, am I wrong? Look up the wrong tag on AO3 and calling you mommy won't be that incorrect. Besides, what can we even do?"

Chuuya looked to the side, contemplating for a second. "Well, after cleaning we could prepare for the entrance exams, or gather information. And either way, we should go eat lunch soon."

Their current meal situation was that they ate in the school cafeterias. It was finals week for the students, so the only window of time in which students would see the pair would be right before or after school, or during their lunch period. It seemed like the teachers didn't want for them to meet (as Aizawa put it, "You would be a distraction to their studies"), and thus forced Dazai and Chuuya to only go to eat lunch an hour before the students' actual lunch period.

"Fine, let's go eat." Dazai finally turned off his phone and slowly stood up, stretching his sore back and arm muscles.

The two left their room and ambled through the hallways, with occasional pauses as Dazai considered suicide locations.

"Hmm, this one has a nice view. Do you think I would die if I fell from this window?"

"Can you stop that? It's creepy."