Lost and Found

Fame, but not fortune.

~~~~~12 Years Later~~~~~~

"Dir en grey!"
"Dir en grey!"
"Dir en grey!"

"Damn...these fans are loud as hell!!" Shinya, Dir en grey's drummer shouted.
"Yeah". Said Kyo, the relatively quiet vocalist. He was sitting off in the corner tapping a pen against the wall.
"It happens a lot. You should be used to it by now". Toshiya, the bands bassist said, sweat dripping off of his face.

"Where's Die and Kaoru?" Questioned Shinya.
"I don't know. Maybe they went out for a smoke?" Toshiya said.
"I don't know how you guys do that". Shinya said, screwing up his face.
He took a seat next to Kyo.

"Hey! It actually calms you down. And, maybe their lighting up because of the six people we have coming in". Toshiya sighed.
"Eh!? What six people?" That peaked Kyo's attention. He turned a full 360 degrees to face Toshiya.
"Six fans got backstage passes. They're going to ask us some questions, probably get something signed. Only for about 20 to 25 minutes". Toshiya answered calmly.

"Only about 20-25 minutes...I just want to get home". Kyo sighed, feeling agitated.
"I don't know why you're complaining Kyo! We can have almost ANYTHING! Girls, money, 10 cars, more money. People are probably dying to be us, or meet us". Toshiya laughed.
"Key word Toshiya...ALMOST anything. I don't need all that shit".
Toshiya rolled his eyes. "Money makes the world go 'round Kyo. We have fame and fortune". Usually Kyo tries not to let Toshiya get to him, but, he couldn't hold his anger back.
"What if everything was free? What if money didn't exist? Then what would make the world go 'round?" Kyo yelled, standing up and leaving the area where the Drummer and bassist were.

"What got to him?" Shinya questioned.
"Probably PMS". Toshiya laughed.
Shinya shook his head, and went to go look for the two guitarists.

~~~~~~KYO'S POV~~~~~~
I had to get away from there. First off, Toshiya was getting to me. And, secondly, I'm not really in the mood to meet fans. I find myself entering a door that says "STAFF ONLY". And, even though I'm not a staff member, there is a staircase in the room that leads up to the roof. I opened the door, and climbed a few steps to reach the top. I exhaled deeply, enjoying the spring air. It was about 11:30 at night. The concert finished about a half-hour ago. But, our job wasn't done.

Damned Backstage passes.

I decided to smoke. I reached into my sweater, pulling out my cigarettes and lighter. I find myself looking up into the night sky, thinking. First I was thinking about how tired and hungry I was. Then I started thinking about what Toshiya told me.

"We have fame and fortune". I mumbled, repeating that last sentence he told me.
Yeah, right. I may have fame, but I sure as hell don't feel like I have fortune. I lost my fortune years ago. Before I can stop myself, I am thinking about her. She was my fortune.

She was my reason I kept myself sane half the time. She was my reason for smiling. She was my reason for everything. SHE was everything to me.
But...I resent her. She didn't love me. Or am I just telling myself that? I was young when I said I wouldn't give up. But, I did after all.

I should just stop thinking about her.

But I can't...
About two seconds later I feel my phone vibrating. "Ugh...I should have shut it off". I grumble to myself.
"Moshi-Moshi?"
---------
"Okay! Fine...I'm coming".
---------
"Yeah, yeah. Whatever".
I quickly hang up.
It was time for the meet and greet.

I stay on the roof a little longer before going downstairs. Once I reached there, I wasn't too upset. But I noticed that Shinya looked really uneasy.
I then realized his gaze was on one of the girls. He was staring at her, and she did right back.
I quickly retreated to the small table, and each of the fans shook our hands and I signed whatever they wanted me to.

"SHINYA!" Toshiya yelled. "Snap out of it! You have been staring at the girl since she got here!"
I kind of chuckled. It was true, he has been.
"O-oh uh...Sorry". He quickly grabbed the CD she had and signed it, while smiling to himself.
"It's alright". She smiled back.

After a few more questions, it was time for everybody to leave. And I was the first one up.
Shinya was still having a conversation with that one girl.

"Well, I'm leaving. Goodnight". I said to everyone.
"Night! Oh, and Kyo, tomorrow we have practice around Ten!" Kaoru shouted. I just gave him a wave of the hand.

I hopped into my car and drove home. I rolled down my windows, letting all the air reach into the car. The air felt nice. Once I got home, I took my shoes off and ran to my room. I was so tired that all I did was take off my sweater and shirt. I didn't even bother pulling my jeans off. I quickly brushed my teeth, and jumped into my warm bed.

Just as I was dozing off, my phone buzzed again. I picked it up, but this time it was a text message. It was from Erika. My current girlfriend of two months.
She sure as hell is annoying.
I began to read it.

'Kyo. I just thought I'd say congrats because you finished your concert tonight! Well, I hope you sleep well and dream of me. I know I will. XP----Love Erika'.

Sure...she wants to say congrats? Since when. She must want something. She barely wishes me luck, or does much of anything for me. Well, I don't exactly do anything for her. That damned Toshiya set me up with her about 2 months ago. I told him not to. He insisted because he said I'm lonely. And, trust me. I fought against her being my girlfriend. But, she was the clingy type, and she pushed herself onto me. I didn't even give her my number, Toshiya did.

I shut my phone, not replying to her; I usually don't. I turned my phone off and again thought about what Toshiya told me. "I don't have fortune. My fortune is gone". I said closing my eyes.

Forever.