Finding Salaam After Talaq

Chapter 1: freedom

Today is December 14th, 2019. There I stood under the warm embrace of the sun outside the courtroom, wearing a victorious smile on my face. The rays of light seemed to symbolize the newfound hope that had enveloped my life. Daytime wasn't my usual preference, but on this extraordinary occasion, I welcomed the brightness as a sign of a fresh beginning.

Finally, I had attained freedom. I emerged triumphant from the grueling shariah case against my now ex-husband, and to my immense relief, I was granted full custody of my beloved daughter, Salamah. The arduous journey to this point was marked by courage and sacrifice, as I ransomed myself from an unbearable marriage. Such a divorce, known as Khul'i, provided me a means to liberate myself from the shackles of a loveless bond.

As I stood there, basking in my hard-earned victory, I couldn't help but reminisce about the challenges I had endured. The last three years had been a tumultuous roller coaster, and the scars of those difficult times were etched into my heart. However, I had persevered for the sake of my daughter, Salamah, who had now grown into a beautiful 4-year-old Masha Allah.

Tears of joy and gratitude welled up in my eyes as I called my aunt to share the good news. Each word I uttered was infused with an overwhelming sense of relief. Alhamdulillah ala ni'imatullah (Praise be to Allah for His blessings) for granting me the strength to endure this tribulation.

Determined to express my gratitude, I made my way to the mosque to offer two raka'ats of gratitude in sujood. As I prostrated before Allah, my soul poured out in a cathartic release. Those tears were not only of happiness and relief but also mingled with exhaustion. It was time to turn a new page in the book of my life, to let go of the past, and embrace the blank slate that lay ahead.

Life after divorce would not be a walk in the park. I was fully aware that scornful eyes would follow, gossip would swirl, and judgmental whispers would surround me like a dense fog. But this time, I was different. I had found an inner strength, a resilience that emanated from my newfound faith and the profound bond with my daughter.

However, my story doesn't begin on this victorious day. It all traces back to a momentous chapter that unfolded in 2008, when life held promise, and dreams were ripe for the taking.
Fresh out of the University of Waterloo in Canada, I was a young graduate with a first-class degree in chemistry. I had the world at my feet, and the future gleamed like a golden horizon.

I harbored a fervent desire to return to my homeland, Nigeria, and contribute my knowledge to effect change, one step at a time. But before embarking on my noble mission, my closest friends and I decided to celebrate the triumph of our academic journey with a grand dinner.

A warm and cozy restaurant, the likes of which we had never experienced, was chosen for our celebration. A circle of friendship bound by hijabs and the Nigerian heritage connected us as if we were sisters. Among them was Khadijah, our Canadian friend, who added a touch of diversity to our sisterhood.

We laughed, reminisced, and celebrated each other's achievements as we indulged in the luxury of fine dining. Little did I know that this dinner would set the wheels of fate in motion.

Ahmed, a magnetic Nigerian from the northwest, entered the restaurant like a force of nature. Handsome and charismatic, he commanded attention effortlessly. His presence drew people toward him, like moths to a flame, and he was always surrounded by friends.

Though my heart swelled with curiosity and attraction, I dared not express my captivation. Instead, I discreetly stole glances at him, while my friends playfully nudged each other, conspiring with mischievous glints in their eyes. Their teasing only heightened my self-consciousness.

"Go ask for his number. Today is your last day in Canada anyway, so what could hurt?" Karima, always the bold one, whispered with a sly grin.

I couldn't help but snort in disbelief, spraying juice as I tried to suppress my laughter. "No, are you crazy?! I don't want to be embarrassed in front of everyone!" I replied, whisper-shouting.

But my friends were relentless in their pursuit to push me toward destiny. They exchanged whispers, each one urging me to seize the moment and capture the attention of the enigmatic Ahmed.

We bantered and bickered playfully throughout the dinner, and I found myself becoming increasingly conscious of Ahmed's presence. However, as the evening drew to a close, I tried to forget the enchanting encounter and focus on the impending journey back to Nigeria.

Life's unpredictability, however, had other plans in store for me. As I made my way back home, a simple misstep, a broken heel, changed everything. It was as if fate had intervened, positioning me in a fateful encounter with Ahmed once more.

To my surprise, he appeared out of nowhere, like a guardian angel, with my broken heel nestled in his palm. A kind smile graced his lips as he offered to help. It was a magical moment, and in the soft glow of the street lamp, I couldn't help but notice a subtle glistening on his dark skin. It was as if the universe was orchestrating a meeting beyond my comprehension.

As he returned my broken heel, our eyes met, and for an instant, time seemed to stand still. In that fleeting moment, a connection sparked, and my heart thumped wildly in my chest.

"Fatima Ayn Muhammad, right? You're that sole Nigerian girl who studied chemistry!" he uttered, catching me off guard.

Startled but unable to conceal my surprise, I replied, "Uh, y-yes, that's me."

His confident smile and easy manner left me momentarily flustered. But gathering my composure, I responded with a nod, impressed that he knew my name even though we had never spoken before.

With casual charm, he introduced himself, "Ahmed Kabir, is my name."

"So listen, to be honest, I caught you sneaking glances back at the restaurant," he paused, pointing toward the place we had dined.

"And I took a liking to you. Do you mind giving me your contact information, please?" he asked with a teasing grin.

Though tempted by the attention, I knew I had to remain steadfast. "I'm sorry for staring, but I can't give you my contact," I replied firmly, determined to protect my heart from possible future heartache.

He seemed taken aback, crossing his arms as he questioned, "Oh, why not?"

Undeterred, I explained, "I'm leaving tomorrow, so there's no point anyway."

He persisted, pleading, "Oh, come on, Ayn. May I call you Ayn?" I nodded in agreement. "What's the harm in that? Come on, even your email is fine, please."

Caught in a moment of contemplation, I finally relented, thinking that I could easily ignore his calls and emails later. Taking his phone, I saved my number in his contacts, sealing a connection that would change the course of my life forever.

"Here you go. Bye," I said coolly, my heart beating faster as I tried to act nonchalant.

"I'll call you later, so save my number," he said playfully, offering a wink and a salute before walking away.

As I rejoined my friends, I was greeted with squeals of excitement and a barrage of questions. Though I tried to play it cool, I knew deep down that this encounter was more significant than I could fathom. Fate had unexpectedly intertwined our paths, and I couldn't shake the feeling that Ahmed's arrival into my life was anything but ordinary.

Little did I know that this chance encounter with Ahmed was just the prologue to a life-altering tale. A journey that would lead me through the trials of divorce and despair, only to discover strength, resilience, and newfound faith in the embrace of Islam. A journey that would ultimately lead me to finding peace, love, and forgiveness after divorce.

This is the beginning of my story, a tale of transformation and redemption, woven within the threads of fate and guided by the wisdom of Allah. A story that would take me on an epic journey of self-discovery, love, and spiritual growth. But fate had other plans for us, and as my story unfolds, it will become clear that the meeting with Ahmed was just the first step on a path of unforeseen twists and turns.