𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 ; Bill Kaulitz

𝐑𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 ; 14

5 months have went past Bill and I have been dating for half a year and I do have to admit it's been probably the best half year of my life. Bill is a type of person who's extremely clingy and attached which isn't a bad thing it's honestly a good thing, he's such a lover boy and he's such a kind and sweet boy still even in a relationship he tries to make plans for me he tries to rearrange things and make things happen such as take me on tours take me to interviews and even if it doesn't work all the time I'm still glad that he still tries.

Yes Bill and I have decided to make things public about a month and a half ago and I do have to say I really do regret it. Tokio Hotel it's still a big band and despite the fact that I haven't really been making music going on tours going on interviews and it really appearing on TV I've been losing my fans slowly, but when the media found out that Bill and I were together I felt like the whole world turned against me.

All of his fangirls started finding out personal information about me such as my phone number, my email, information that I didn't share to the media, and then they started sending me death threats and threads, basically saying how if I didn't and things with Bill things would go extremely bad and I was scared for the most part of it. It got really bad to the point I had to have a conversation with Bill and as much as I loved him I tried to end things off he sat there and he listened to what I had to say and he asked me if something had happened.

Explained how his fan girls were scaring the crap out of me and trying to tell the media private information about me and I wasn't exactly comfortable with everything I told him I loved him and I told him I didn't want to end things but I was scared for my own behalf, he understood surprisingly and he decided to have a chat with the media and all of his fans and when he did it really helped things out.

Despite the fact that she made a statement about it, it didn't entirely stop sometimes I still get emails still get threats the death threats have stopped entirely which is amazing and I'm really glad for that because that was the most part I was scared of but sometimes I still get threads that people will tell the media information about me but I wasn't comfortable sharing yet which I knew they got from my mother and I just had to pay them but it wasn't a lot of money they just wanted something small like $100.

This caused me to have a conversation with my mom that did not go well at all what was worse about it is the fact that she tried to gaslight me and she tried to record me and make me seem like the bad person but I told her it wasn't going to work because all my friends know when the entire media knows that I've written songs about her that don't have the best meanings behind them so whatever car she tries to pull will be absolutely useless. Just like that I left because she hasn't been a mother to me and she never will be a mother to me.

The fact that my stepmother is a gold digging bitch I was beyond shock when she actually began to take care of me if she was more of a mother to me than my own mom was and that's a lot for me to say because I hate both of them, I hate my stepmom only because she uses my dad and doesn't really love him I tried to explain to him but it didn't really work and it just ended up causing an argument between me and my dad so ever since the argument died down I just shut my mouth.

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Bill has been on tour and it's been a couple of weeks and I really do miss him but I'm just glad that he's able to do the things that he's loved ever since he was a little kid. When the tour first start we talked all the time when we could but as weeks by we slowly and slowly stopped talking and now we only talk five times a week which may seem like a lot but it really isn't. People have been saying that he's cheated on me but I don't really believe them I know that they're just trying to start rumors to make me break up with him.

But sometimes I can't wonder if he really is or not I knew I can trust him and I know I still can but sometimes what the media says really sticks into my head and it makes me overthink and it makes me start doubting. I've been trying to find a way to get past it and they work sometimes the ways that I cope work sometimes but it doesn't work all the time.

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