HEAVY

The Changes

Having dated for almost two years, their relationship was going well, they earned new pals and had met almost each other's pals. Their sex was magical, dazzling skin to skin and their interlocked tongue kisses lit up their skins. The two had gone through a couple of disagreements, and exchanged hurtful words and living together had become quite challenging. Curtis had lost his job, had turned to alcohol for comfort and argued with Sofi any chance he got. He began to come home late in the night or not be home at all, to avoid any questions or concerns she brought up. He neither called nor texted her and Sofi started to be bitter but still showed him love regardless of his situation. Although she wanted it to be for better and for worse, when the situation did not change and Curtis refused to try out therapy, Sofi chose to move out, get her apartment and give Curtis time to contemplate things and come up with a decision of what he truthfully longed for.

Curtis and Sofi tried long distance after she finalized her coursework and went away on practicum, but it was harder on her, as it was on him.  Their sexual connection was deep, especially when he visited, but their communication was still a little bit rocky and often choked on them. Curtis later secured a job and cut down on his alcohol intake, prioritising his life and his relationship with Sofi, trying to win her passionate self back. He apologized frequently for his mistakes and promised Sofi to never put her through distress again. She believed him and took him back.

After she was through with her practicum, Sofi relocated to the city. She spent her free days with her boyfriend, in his apartment. She was surprised to get wind of his plans for him to meet her parents and his willingness to work things out, but she was still trying to figure out what she truly wanted. Sofi set up a dinner date with Curtis, to take advantage of that time and talk about her thoughts, emotions and what was going on between them. It was their second anniversary and she made dinner plans to celebrate, just the two of them. She took out her phone, dialled his number and called him. He sounded jovial, his voice, a sweet melody in her ears and she could picture his cute smile. Unfortunately, her mind repeatedly reminded her of things that went wrong and was stuck on what if the past did repeat itself. She didn't live in the present fully, but felt it and enjoyed it to some extent, still, the past shadowed her, the wrongs, hurts, damages and fights.

She felt relaxed that Curtis was getting the help he needed, made moves to help her out and also put effort into their relationship, but she still hung back on the past. Curtis was doing everything right, but she did not entirely trust all was well. Sofi had chosen love that came with money, good sex and intentionality, but still felt the intentions would change and their love would be dependent on what changes they would be experiencing. Their love illuminated her life, even in her thoughts, but she required to know his thoughts on her findings. Curtis was more than happy to join her girlfriend for dinner. His voice was full of joy and anticipation. She felt how extensively he yearned to see her that night, occasionally, it felt like he was obsessed with her. But that is what love is, right?

At 6:30 p.m. on a Wednesday, Sofi stepped into the kitchen and started on the dinner preparations. She wore a blush handless crop top and tiny black cotton shorts. She also put on her kitchen apron with the word foodie engraved on it seamlessly. She was making his favourite meal: chicken stew with stir-fried vegetable rice and some maziwa mala, which she bought at his favourite joint and was already in the fridge to cool. As the chicken was marinating, she set one cup of rice on the stove to boil and started to cut the vegetables. She had three bell peppers(red, yellow and green), two bunches of dhania, two red onions, two medium-sized tomatoes and half a cup of green peas for the rice. For the chicken stew, she prepared two large white onions, and two large tomatoes and later decided to put in a handful of shredded spinach.

On the television, she played the playlist Curtis had made her for their first anniversary. She worked around the kitchen dancing to the mixtape. Everything looked great and every pot seamed on the stove, filling the aromas in the kitchen. The doorbell rang, and there he was, casually dressed in blue jeans with shades of white, a black T-shirt and a long jungle-green puff jacket. On his right hand, a bouquet of Sofi's favourite flowers: black and pink roses mixed up with a couple of tulips. His perfume, fair and sexy, filled the room and reminded her of the day they met. She embraced him tightly, tears forming at the corner of her eyes. He handed her the flowers, kissed her cheek and  said, "Happy anniversary hun, I feel blessed for you." He took off the puff jacket, placed it on the jacket hanger and they walked into her living area, his hands around her waist, he sat down on the sofa and held her on his lap.