The One I Love ☆

𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒅. {𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒔𝒉!}

{Hello everyone! I would just like to let you know that it's okay to be upset, and feel free to vent to me anytime, on the comments of this chapter. You shouldn't be suffering in silence, and I'm here for you, okay? <3}

{Hanako/Amane pov}

What happened..? Why do I suddenly feel all tired? I don't need sleep, I'm a ghost after all. I'll just go take a nap in the nurse's office, not like anybody would notice when school starts.

Why am I so hungry? As a ghost I didn't need to eat as I never felt hunger, but now I feel.. Hungry?

Could it be?
No.
I'm over thinking it!

Hanako/amane goes over to the nurse's office, to rest on one of the beds

5:00am

That feels.. A little.. Better!

Come to think of it.. My body feels different. And where's my haku-jodai at?

What happened?

I feel warm inside..

6:00am

Still feeling a little weak, I'll just go see if Tsuchigomori-sensei has anything I could eat..

I swear if he gives me some sort of bug I will freak out.

7:20 am, and hour untill the school gates open.

Tsuchigomori-sensei helped out a bit! He made some hard candy for me, he didn't wanna know why I needed it to be honest - I'm his favorite student so he did it anyway!

8:20am

The school gate will open in 10 minutes, I should go wait for Yashiro in the usual spot!

8:23 am

She's here so early - what?? It's only, like, 8:23 am or something!

"Hanako-kun, could you do me a favor?" Yashiro spoke, a little nervously, to me. Of course I agreed. Who wouldn't? It was a simple favour, so I was fine with it. She just wanted to make me wear the new school uniform. That's not weird, she wanted to see what id look like, alive. I'll put it on a little later.

"'Could you put it on now? Please?" Yashiro asked me. I mean, there's no harm in doing it now, but why?

She asked so I may as well. I think it's my size anyways!

8:25 am

Whilst putting this new uniform on, I see my scars. From when I was living.

Looking fresh.
I should.. Bandage these. I don't want anyone to see.

They'll judge me

Yashiro would think I'm a freak.

That is exactly what I am

A pathetic, useless freak that never deserved to be alive in the first place.

I don't deserve such nice people in my afterlife. If they knew what I was like when I was living, they'd hate me.

Just like how I hate myself. I'm ultimately worthless. Nobody should ever like me. I'm some disgusting kid that given up on life 50+ years ago. I just stopped counting.

Watching the time go by. Thinking where did I go wrong to deserve everything that happened to me.

I disgust myself.

They wouldn't care for me. They'd hate me. They all do hate me now, they are just pretending to like me, pretending to be sympathetic. So when I trust them they'd make fun of me and leave me! Just like what everyone else did.

I'm a complete f**k up. I don't deserve friends. I wish I was never born in the first place. I have no value to anyone, I never did and never have. Therefore it's pointless. Why would anyone birth such an insignificant being.

Like me. Why was I born. I never wanted to be.

My mum should've had an abortion or took birth pills. Or my dad should've worn protection! Anything to stop my sh**ty self from being alive.

8:30 am. School gates open

Still don't understand why I had to wear this now, but whatever. The gate should be open now, I'll go find Yashiro!

Hanako/amane finds yashiro. Yashiro hands him a bento box.

"I made you this, and there's a few donuts I made for us in my school bag as well! I figured you might be hungry, right? The bento is for later on!" Yashiro tells me. A bento? Even DONUTS? Is she a God?

But how does she know I'm hungry?
Something fishy is going on..
Not bc yashiro is a fish.
Something.. Else.