The Movement of the Earth

Chapter 6: Gravity

but as always, the thing that he loves he will change
Tori Amos, "Virginia"

6: Gravity

The trip back to Forks was so quiet that I could hear each tiny rattle in the truck's engine. The trees passed by in a blur of evergreen, and the mist clouded the windshield without a single drop of rain falling.

My dread from earlier had expanded into full-fledged alarm. Jacob had already told me that he was a werewolf, that he had killed a vampire and intended to kill more, that all his friends were wolves too and they could read each others' minds. What could possibly be so strange after all that? What would he be so terrified to tell me?

Whatever it was, did he think I couldn't handle it? Hadn't I proven that I was pretty good with weird?

Did he not trust me?

Maybe that was it. I scratched around the edge of my cast, feeling the cool skin where an inch of the scar from James remained visible. After all, I'd been the girlfriend of a vampire - though girlfriend was such a blase, hackneyed term for what Edward and I had been. There wasn't a word in any language for what we'd been. And while Edward had cut himself loose from that connection, I still remained, somehow eternally bound to him even though he was free from me.

I could see how Jacob might not want to share many secrets with a girl eternally bound to one of his mortal enemies.

That wasn't right, though; just because I was bound to Edward didn't mean I would be disloyal to Jacob. The very idea was absurd. No matter what the big secret was, I would never, ever betray him. Not to anyone.

Not even to Edward? a little voice in my head asked.

I swallowed hard. It was a pointless question, but that didn't stop the painful sting. Edward wasn't coming back. There would never be any reason for he and Jacob to be at odds. My faithfulness to one would never be stacked against my loyalty to the other.

But if he wanted to know, the little voice egged me on. Would you tell him?

My gaze slid away from the window and to my left, to the enormous copper-toned hands gripping the steering wheel. The hands that had held mine more times than I could count, that now flinched away from me whenever I reached for them.

No. I knew wouldn't betray Jacob's secrets. Not even if Edward asked me to.

The realization allowed something rattling loose in my chest to settle and quiet down. The dread faded from my body and replaced itself with resolve. For some reason, Jacob didn't trust me enough anymore to touch me. But he could trust me, I knew it - if I would defend him from Edward, then I would certainly defend him from anyone else on the face of the earth. I would just have to show him. I would prove myself trust-worthy in his eyes. Somehow.

I would start by taking whatever this new secret was very, very well.

Faster than I would have thought possible, given the truck's speed limitations, we were pulling into my driveway. The mist was so thick that the outline of the house seemed hazy. There was no sign of the cruiser; Charlie must not have returned from the station yet.

I turned and studied Jacob's face. He stared straight ahead, like he was hoping that the side of the house would give him the strength to do... whatever it was that he had to do. I also had the sneaking suspicion that he was trying to figure out if he could simply jump out of the truck and run away.

I made every effort to be patient, but the time ticked by with agonizing slowness. After five minutes I finally said, "Jake, look-"

"I imprinted on you." The words came out in a rush. "I imprinted on you and I'm sorry and I promise I'm fighting it as hard as I can, but it happened and it's pretty tough to hold off and I didn't want to tell you but maybe Sam's right, maybe it'll be better this way, but I don't think he really knows what he's talking about even if he thinks he does, and it's not your fault or your problem but I swear I'm going to figure something out soon and then things will be like they were before except it might be kind of hard for awhile and the whole thing really sucks."