Virago - Ivar The Boneless

Pain and Weakness

"Life is fleeting, my child," Lagertha looked at her young daughter. "I want you to know that whatever happens, you deserve happiness." 

Lagertha walks towards her young daughter, her youth showing at her young age, for Iona had not yet hit her teenage years. The child smiled at her mother's words before allowing her mother to embrace her. With all the love in her heart, Little Bear returned to care and compassion her mother showed her, she never thought that things would change so drastically. 

Pulling away from her mother, Little Bear looked up at her mother. "What happens after we die?"

The shieldmaiden was taken back by her daughter's question, she could only answer with what she knew. "For you my love, you need not worry. Death is so far away but when you die, I assure you, I will be there to greet you in the afterlife." She did not want her daughter to be scared of the inevitable, for Lagertha knew death was a part of life. "No matter what happens in your life, you will find the ones you love by your side. In death everyone is together, everyone is there for you."

The young blonde sat at the table, she did not know why she was so intrigued at the time, but something about death fascinated her. "Even if you do bad things?"

Sitting opposite her daughter, the older woman looked over at her child. "What you perceieve to be bad, will be good to someone else. No one is truly evil, Little Bear. You need to learn to forgive people, even if they take away all that means something to you, you cannot move on without forgiveness."

"To forgive is not weak?"

"To forgive is the hardest thing in the word," Lagertha reached over and held the cold hand of her child. "Not everything can be forgiven, but you should always try." She smiled, "You do not want to die knowing you are unhappy, knowing you have not finished your story."

Little Bear looked down at their entwined hands, she only ever wanted happiness. Her mother had given her so many happy years, teaching her the skills required to live. 

 "What about love?"

Lagertha's smile turned to a sad and wistful one, like she was remembering something. "Love is a dangerous thing," the shieldmaiden pulled her hand back and laid her hands together on her lap. She looked down, she had been burnt too many times and she knew love brought pain yet when it came to her true love, she'd do it over and over every time, suffer every time if she could be happy with Ragnar. "You will know when you fall in love. It's a beautiful thing," she looked back to her daughter, she hoped that Iona would find love like she'd had with Ragnar, the love they shared when they first found each other, not the love they had at that moment. 

"When you find love, do not let go." Standing up, Lagertha wiped a small tear from under her eye before turning away from her daughter. She didn't want her daughter knowing the hard truths that came with love, not at this age. She had so much time to find herself a great man, a man who would treat her right and be the only man she would need to rely on. 

"Little Bear," her name sounded in her ears. It felt like it was so far away. Her eyelids were heavy and her brain was fuzzy, the light beamed through the thin skin of her eyelids as she laid still. Pain radiated through her entire body, a feeling of dread feeling her every feeling and crevice. If this was death, it was not how she imagined it. This was painful and her mind was still littered with gut-wrenching memories, memories, images, words. Everything only brought her back to him, even now. 

"Ivar," she managed to mumble. It took all her strength, but she was hopeful that he was the one who would come to her. Her head pounded, it was like nothing she'd experienced.

It felt like the last few years had changed her life, she'd held onto a love she found, a love which had betrayed her quickly and easily. She knew she shouldn't still want him, nor to a degree, need him but that was how she felt. Ivar was the only one who could set a fire inside of her, without him she'd lost a sense of purpose. 

There was no purpose for her at Ringerike, not a real purpose that made her feel like it was her home, like it was a place she belonged. But the intrusive thoughts also told her that she belonged no where at all. No where was home, no where was a place she was meant to be, to her, she was an outsider. 

She didn't even know where her family was. She didn't have any idea where her mother was, nor her brother. There was no one else for her to turn to. There was no need for her to even think about the man who had been outed as her father, for he was no one to the young blonde. 

"Little Bear," her name sounded in her ears again as she felt a squeeze of her right hand. 

The voice was mildly recognizable but in the state she was in, Iona could not tell who it was. 

"I need her to come with us," the voice spoke. The darkness scared the young woman, her weakness made her struggle to speak, move or open her eyes, but she could not control what was happening around her. 

Iona could only listen, the hand still held hers but she struggled to place who was it was. She felt like she was in a dream, a nightmare. She needed to wake up, she needed for time to disappear and return to when it was simple but nothing was happening, it was just darkness and pain. 

"Please," the person spoke. 

"She is not strong enough to travel any where," another voice spoke. "I cannot let her leave."

The original unknown voice could be heard again from by her side. "My intentions coming here have changed. She is the most important thing right now. I have never seen her so weak," the person said, their voice sad and gravelly as Little Bear's brain began to engage and rework. 

Managing to find some strength, she squeezed the hand back, a gentle and small movement which she knew had gotten the attention she wanted when she felt the hand in hers tense up. "Hvit," she mumbled, she knew it was him. He'd be the only one who come all this way to find him, it was him, always.