Red Mess 【ToriTam】

When will today end?

Translations at the end of the chapter! :D

I get out of my room with my favourite purple bunny slippers on, they're really cute- I know. I close the door and stretch my arms above my head. My arms feel like they fell asleep, it sends me tingles and tickles down when I touch them.

I go downstairs and see mum (Paula) watching TV on the brown couch in the living room. Her left arm on top the rim of the couch, her elbow bending up so that her hand, that was in a fist, was against her face."Hey mum, did ma make lunch?" I ask her while pulling knots out of my hair with my fingers.

It kinda hurt.

"Hm? Oh yeah- no, she just said that to get you down here" she says turning her head the the left so half of her face is visible to me-- who's standing at the end of the stairs. "Seriously? So I came here for nothing..?" I reply with an annoyed voice, I mean duh I'm annoyed, I came down here for nothing.
"Yeah, she wanted to ask what you were craving so-" she says turning back to the TV. She has the channel on the BBC news, they're talking about an army, probably the one where my mums work at.

"Well I'm not really hungry right now" I walk towards her and sit on the couch so I'm seated in the middle. "Can we watch a movie together? The news is kinda boring" I ask her kinda hoping she'd say yes, there was this new movie that came out a while ago- apparently its pretty good.

I think it was called 'Insane Zombie Pirates from Hell' or something like that, I really wanted us to watch it together as a family. "Hm, I'm not sure... I think me and your mother will have to leave soon, we got called for another mission last night" she says while reaching for the remote and clicking a red button to turn the TV off.

"..." silence

Then a door behind us opens, from the left side of the living room. Ma walks out of the bathroom. "Oh, Tori, I was about to ask if you wanted take-out or.." she stops to look at me and mum while trying to read the atmosphere in the room. "..Did something bad happen?" She asks rubbing her hands together and tapping her foot on the floor, nervously. 'Not yet..' I think to myself

"Why didn't you guys tell me you had to leave?..again! You promised you would" I say looking down at the floor and hugging myself. Saying that last part felt weird.. like I've heard it millions of times before. "Tori, you know we don't want you to worry.. and when we do tell you-- you get mad and ask us why we can't stay home or just leave the army, even though you know why we can't..." Mum says and turning to the left, facing me.

"Yes, and Tori you know we don't want to leave you here.. we just can't-- we can't say no to this, do.. do you understand?" Ma says walking towards me, kneeling down infront of me so I can see her and she can see me with watery eyes.

I blink quickly so the tears would go away, I try to breathe in with my mouth since my nose began to feel runny- but the air chokes up in my throat and it makes my face go red and my eyes more watery. I let out a choked up sob. I put my face in my hands and cry. Ma stands up and sits next to me on the couch so she's on the left, she pulls me into a hug. "Shh, it's okay honey, they won't hurt us if we go, remember? It's okay, don't worry..." she whispers and pats my hair soothingly.

I cry into her shoulder, I try to be as quiet as possible but it didn't work-- as my crying could probably be heard from outside or the other side of the house. I'm so embarrassing, why am I crying?
They're going to be fine. This happens from time to time, so why am I upset now?

Is it because they can't leave the army even if they wanted to?
Because I don't want to be alone anymore?
I'm done with being alone..
They always get hurt out there and lie to me, they say they're fine and that they've been through worse.. that only makes me worry even more..