Balik - Tanaw | HeeJay

Balik - Tanaw : III.

Another day to fulfill the list in Heather’s journal, it was also the day he would go to paragliding. One of the most anticipated activity of his boyfriend. TOTGA na aktibidad ng kaniyang jowa. Today, he would fulfill this acivity with enjoyment and fun. He’s excited to witness this spontaneous event.

Paragliding.

They said that when you go to a paragliding activity, you should hope that it’s a good weather to do it. Because the materials used depends on the air, like the parachute. When Jice was on his way to the site, it was a little bit rainy. He hitched on his breath. He was hoping that it would eventually go away. He can’t miss this activity, not today. 2 and a half hour of driving, he arrived at the destination. Hindi na umaambon. As if it’s on cue, the weather became good again. Phew. That almost took a turn on his way home.

He’s on full gear, he just have to wait for the guide. When they are already set, the instructor told him to run, and he did. And, at last. They flew right off the cliff. He was holding a selfie stick, capturing the moment. He can feel the breeze of the morning sky. He was having fun, his heart is at ease. He thinks that Heather’s also at ease when Jice is at ease.

“Heather, I can feel your presence when I was above the land. I can feel you, Heather. I do.”

Travel to Camiguin.

As soon as Jice stepped out of the ferry, he can feel the fresh air. The place where Heath wanted to go. He can see it now why Heather was eager to travel at Camiguin. It was very calming. Para bang namamasahe ang kaniyang buong pagkatao roon nang makalakbay siya sa mga dagat doon. Dahil nasa trip siya ay nasa itinerary niya ang Old Spanish Church Ruins. Dito niya nakita ang malalaking gusali ng simbahan. He was amaze about how the structure was built. He was astonished about how beautiful it is.

The last destination of their itinerary is the white island. The place where Heath wanted to go the most. It was a minutes travel with a boat. It was wavy, but all he could see of was the scenery that unfolds before him. The dazzling thin white sand that’s on his feet. The clear sea around the island. It was a pure cinematic scene. It was at that time when he can feel his freedom. The freedom to be contented and happy again. Jice is happy. Heather was happy.

“Heath, I’ve come to the place you loved. It was so nice here, Heath. We should come again.”

After the days he had spent to fulfill his boyfriend’s list, he had to come home and rest for a week. He had all planned the flight to Maldives and Switzerland. The only thing to do is to board the plane and he’s ready to go.

The days he spent resting in his house was also the days he’s reading Heath’s journal. He’s on page 40 when he knew that Heather’s disease were slowly getting into his system. Causes him to feel light headed, always coughing, feverish, constant chest pains, and resorts his body to become thin.

“Andito na naman ako, journal. Parang kinakailangan lang kita pag- wala na akong kausap dito sa kwarto ah HAHAHAHA. These past few days, I’ve been coughing blood. Mucus were greenery and shit like that, and I hate to admit, but I think I’m really gonna die. I supposed I’ve been living a bad kid in my past life that’s why I’m in this state right now. Well, fuck that kid in the past, now suffering on my own consequences.

I still didn’t tell Jice. I am so afraid. I am so afraid of what his reaction, because I know he will cry, and I promised not to make him cry. I can’t just talk to him and tell na may taning na ang buhay ko. I can’t do that. Not to my own husband. Ang sakit. It was too painful to see him being clueless, but I think it’s much better than him knowing. Oh, good bye, journal. Jice is calling me on my phone.