Liquid Courage

Let me read to you// Ch15

Amber's P.O.V.

It had been a few weeks since me and Matt first slept together and since that night we had gotten into kind of a routine. We go to work together do our jobs and get questioned by Foggy and Karen throughout the day as we secretly tempt one another in the simplest ways sneaking in a soft touch here and there but overall trying to stay focused on the important work we do. Then we walk home wicked smiles clouding wicked thoughts of what we would do when we got back to Matt's apartment except every now and then I would see his falter and his head peak up like a deer listening for the wolf as it stocks closer on the dark dense forest. He didn't think I noticed acting like everything was ok as if trying to hide this fear of an unknown danger from me.

If I asked he would say it was nothing to worry about and that he would check it out later. We would get back and eat some food making jokes and playing teasing games as if the interaction hadn't happened before finally feasting on the meal we had been truly waiting for all day.

He always waited to leave until I fell asleep only for me to wake after he left and feel weirdly alone. When he was gone I still felt observed like even a shift in my heartbeat would send something or someone towards me from the dark corners of the room. I wasn't scared just on edge always distracting myself with music or a video on my phone. Once he was back it felt like everything was ok again except that feeling of being observed as if through a microscope sometimes didn't go away it stayed in the back of my mind. Always leading me to wonder what was going on.

Tonight was no different I had begun tossing and turning trying to sleep again until I gave up on it and decided to grab a book from my bag and reading next to the window while it rained deciding that I didn't want to turn on the lights. As I read I began to read out loud as a way to feel less alone. As the words left my lips following my eyes as they drifted along the page. Smiling at the cute moments and laughing at the dumb ones.

At some point I must have been so drawn into the book that I hadn't noticed when Matt had reapeared at the apartment. Because when I finally came back to reality to refill my water I chucked the glass at him as he stood in the dark out of fear only for him to catch it. I glared at him as he laughed slowly setting it down and walking into the light letting me see that he had already changed into his sweats and t-shirt. He asked me what I was reading stating that it sounded interesting. I shook my head confused before my eyes drifted to the book now sat next to me.

I softly mentioned the title before looking back at him and asking simply if he was listening to me read outloud like a creep. His deep laugh rand through the apartment making me smirk teasing him about liking the sound of my voice while I read with no dinial from him. He slowly stepped closer with a lazy smile on his face as he planted a soft kiss on my head before he sat next to me and asked me to continue. With a soft smile I did.

With each turn of the page he seemed to slowly relax until I paused to underline a sentence in the book making him question why I had stopped I simply put it as a line spoke to me so I emortalized its position on the page for when I re-read it later in life. He smiled at my words seeming to mull them over in his head as he thought about what they might mean. When he spoke he simply replied with saying "Or you are highlighting it's inportance to the next reader" his voice was soft and warm but held a small bit of sadness.

The sadness was for something I did not know but I had a feeling it might be that he chould not look at the word for himself but only hear their meaning in my voice. I didn't ask him about it simply resting my hand on his with a knowing pressence before getting up to make myself some tea to sooth my throught now a little sore from reading out loud for so long. He let his hand follow mine as I drew him to his feet so we could both have some of the warmth the tea could provide.

I hummed you are my sunshine as I made our tea gaining a few soft notes from Matt. It was only then that I realized how perfect the moment we where in was. Here we stood me making tea and Matt humming the soft song from my childhood as it rained outside. We where in a moment I had thought about often it wasn't dirty and it wasn't overly complicated. It was a soft and sweet moment bathed in warmth from both the tea and the energy. I smiled to myself for a quiet moment before a loud beep from the microwave shook me out of my daydream. I grabbed our mugs from the microwave and placed in the tea bags. Slowly as not to spill I turned around and handed Matt his mug as we discussed many things including why I always seemed to hum that song when happy. My voice had been soft and happy when I mentioned my mom a military vet from a big and poor family out of Massachusetts. I looked up to her all of my life even when she was the one who made it difficult. I laughed at a memory of us at a concert for my thirteenth birthday dancing and laughing without a care in the world. I felt my face drop as I softly mentioned her death not going into extreme detail but enough that he knew what I was saying.

We ended that night with him hugging me as I finally cried over the person I had lost so long ago.