Behind Closed Doors

27: Euphoria

"Kai, say something, please..." Skyler pleads, tears falling as fast as Kaimi's. Kai takes a deep breath, wiping her eyes. She wraps her arms around Skyler, holding her close.

"Skye, it's okay..."

"How?" they snap, making Kai jump. "How is anything about this okay?"

"Because this doesn't change anything between us. I'm not upset because you're non-binary, I'm upset that you never told me," she whispers.

"For the longest time, I wasn't sure. I didn't want to say anything when I wasn't sure," Skyler say. Kaimi can feel them shaking, and puts a hand on theirs.

"When did you realize?" she asks.

"When I went to Aruba... I think that's when it hit me. I met Hayley, and we talked about stuff. She knew so much more about things than I did. She's the one who encouraged me to try and admit my feelings to you, and taught me how to kiss," they admit. Skye tries to hide their flushed cheeks.

"So that's where you learned. I wondered about that," Kai says with a small laugh. "But Skye, you knew before we got together. Why didn't you say anything before then?"

"Because we were both so happy, and I didn't want to ruin the moment. I wanted to be with you so bad that I was willing to try and keep it to myself, but it didn't work as well as I thought. It made me more depressed, knowing that you saw me for someone I wasn't ever going to be."

"I wish you would have told me when you figured it out, Skye. I would've been so happy for you. I would've started using the right pronouns and making you feel more comfortable with yourself. The fact that I've misgendered you your entire life makes me feel horrible," Kaimi admits.

"But that's not your fault, Kai. I chose to keep it a secret. But that's why I'm telling you now. I can't take the guilt anymore, and I can't keep feeling like the only one who can't be myself. If we have to break up, then that's what we have to do."

"What? why would we break up?"

"Because you're a lesbian, and I'm not a girl. That doesn't work," Skye says.

"I told you that I wasn't certain in my sexuality, Skye. I like you, and I'm attracted to you, however you decide to identify. Whatever that makes me, then I guess that's what I am. I like you, as a person, and nothing else matters. I'm not going to break up with you because of a change of pronouns."

Skyler hugs Kaimi again, still unable to contain their tears. They hadn't expected things to go their way. Neither had Kaimi. She worried that Skyler was going to say something that might have changed Kai's mind about everything. Something like that they didn't trust Kai to keep the secret. Or despite that she was okay with it, that Skye still wanted to break up. But that's not the case. Now they can both breath.

"I don't deserve you," Skyler blubbers after another long bout of silence.

"We both deserve each other. Please, don't say things like that!"

Skyler pulls away from Kai feeling isolated with her sudden and harsh words.

"Skye..."

"That's how I always feel. Even before we were dating, I felt like I never deserved you as a friend. It feels like all I do is cause trouble for everyone..."

Kaimi reaches out and pulls them back to her, tears starting up again before she had a chance to rid of them.

"Everything is going to be okay. Please, I want you to believe that. I'll be here for you no matter what. You know that, right?"

Skyler sniffles, nodding their head.

"Good. Now come on, we've gotta go freshen up before your mom comes in wondering what's taking so long. My mission was to get you for dinner," Kai mumbles, patting Skyler's head.