I Remember You.

Chapter 39 - What a Mess!

Lorelei Anderson...

My dad had never talked to me like that before. Not even when he had been mad at me for various things I had done over the years. Hell, not even when I got kicked out of school.

Was what I had done really such an awful thing?

Sure, I know that my dad is a prideful man, but I honestly believed that I was doing something nice for him. After all he had done for me – giving up on having any type of life to raise me; he didn't date; unlike Kevin, I don't believe that my dad even had one-night stands, he rarely went out drinking, which had been never when I was younger and only when I became a teenager had he gone out but he only ever got drunk at Christmas and New Year. My dad worked hard to provide for me and never once made me feel like I missing anything despite not having a lot of money.

I had watched him work shitty jobs for so long – listened when he told me there was no shame in doing the jobs that most people believed were beneath them. However, despite that nugget of wisdom, I knew that he always hoped for more for me; it was why he was so happy when I left for school.

I hated that Sara had left him to have to do all of that. I hated that she had left him to find a way to not only provide for a kid but to also find a way to repay her debt to some really shady people.

Tears were coming thick and fast and honestly; I didn't even try to stop them because a part of me ached for what I had obviously lost.

My dad.

That reaction down there had made it abundantly clear that he had made his choice. The man I had depended on my whole life, the only parent, I had, ever had was choosing the woman who had hurt and betrayed him over me. I had been cast aside for someone who had shown him no loyalty, someone who had tried to tear his whole life apart. How could I make him see that she was a snake?

How could I shake some sense into him?

I needed my dad. I mean, he was my dad. I didn't want to hate him but there was an undeniable part of me that did hate him. I wanted to scream at him, shake him until he could see what the rest of us could see. I wanted to push Sara onto a plane and tell her that if she ever came back here, she would regret it. Most of all though – I just wanted my dad back.

I don't know how long I lay there, sobbing and feeling like my heart was breaking into a million irreparable pieces, but it felt like a life-time before the door clicked open and the bed dipped as Kevin climbed on behind me and scooped me up into his arms.

It was such a tender and loving action that it only made me sob harder. With his big, solid body curved around me I clung to his arm that was banded around my waist. This was my anchor.

Kevin.

My calm in the middle of the storm that was surrounding me, and I grabbed hold, trusting that he wouldn't let me fall any further, "it's ok, sweetheart, I am here!" He whispered into my ear as he squeezed me a little firmer to his body.

No other words were needed as he just held me. Showing me that he was invested in this. In us. Not that I had ever really believed otherwise but there had been a part of me that worried maybe this was purely physical for him. Not to mention the fact that my dad had just referred to me as a child – a part of me flared at the thought maybe Kevin would be reminded of how much younger than him I was.

Time became fluid once again as I didn't realise how long we lay there, wrapped up together, not communicating with words as our bodies did all the communicating that was needed in the moment.