16. i love you

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୨ৎ ꒰ i love you ꒱ ୨ৎ

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.୨ৎ ꒰ i love you ꒱ ୨ৎ.

"no. no, no" willow shoke her head, her cheeks marked by dark tears. "not again. you're lying."

the realization hit her like a truck. her eyes moved quickly from her mom to her brothers. they looked mortified. nobody in the room knew what to do. nobody there knew what was going on.

"why you didn't tell me? why you never talk about anything that bothers you? i could've helped you!" she blurted out against conrad.

hardly breathing, willow rushed outside. conrad was at her heels, but when his arm latched on her sister's wrist, she pulled him away.

"i didn't tell you because i didn't want you to suffer, willow!"

"i don't want to talk right now" he kept her from walking away.

"god, can't you be less stubborn for once?"

"can't you be less emotionless for once? leave me alone!" she yelled and finally he let her go.

conrad phone buzzed in his pocket. a call from paris appeared on the screen, he declined the call. and watched her sister walk away. he didn't meant what he said, but she wasn't wrong. for the past months, he felt confused and lonely, while he had his sibling always by his side, he just didn't want to hurt them. 

willow remembered half of her childhood as the worst years of her life because of the fucking cancer. she would pray every night for her mom to get better, to wake up the next morning not sick anymore.

the country club was desolate and extremely quiet. the stars were beautiful.

she tried to calm down, playing with the ring on her finger, struggling to hold back the tears, but they were rolling down her cheeks like clear marbles.

she felt guilty. for a thousand reasons. she shouldn't have been crying in that beautiful dress. she shouldn't have been so selfish all summer long. she should've caught the signs: the moms smoking, her mom always tired, the fights between her parents. 

the shame was punching every inch of her body. she felt nauseous. she wanted to disappear.

a door slamed, someone walked towards her, two arms wrapped her waist and she turned around, falling in steven's warm hug.  she hold him tight, hearing his heartbeat through his shirt, stained a little by her tears.

"i hate it steven. i hate it so much." willow was sitting on the sidewalk now, her head resting on steven's shoulder. she wasn't expecting him to respond, she just wanted to throw out everything she was holding inside. 

"the first time, i told everybody to kill me if my mom died. i can't handle the thought of not having her by my side anymore. not having my mom singing around the house, or at my gradutation, or walking me down the aisle."

"i will be there, i promise. i know it's not the same. it will never be the same, but i swear i will always be there for you, even if someday you're going to hate me. i won't let you down, ever." steven was confident saying those words, because they've been acting that way their whole life, always there for each other.

"i know my mom always knew we would end up together, boo. and i'm grateful to the fate for bringing us together this summer so she could see it." she placed her hands on his cheeks. "i love you steven" 

"i love you, little monster. i will forever." 

⭑○◦

"mom, you have to try. for us" jeremiah's voice cracked. susannah was sitting between her sons on the couch, willow was on an armchair near the fireplace, still in her debutante dress.

"i don't want to suffer anymore. chances are slight...nonexistent, really" her moms was trying to keep it together, failing. "i can't go through that again, it was to hard the first time."

"please, mom. you have to try"

"i just want to be me when i go. i don't want you three to be mad at me, though." she looked at willow, her eyes full of love for her kids.

"i'm not mad you, mom" willow sobbed. "it's hard, so fucking hard. i don't want to let you go."

"i will be here, in this house, forever." she responded. "i want you to come here and feel safe, as if this house was a big mom hug."

"i still have some time, sweet heart" she stretched  her arms out and willow got up to go sit between her and conrad, who enlaced his fingers with hers. susannah put an arm around her shoulders.

"you're wearing the ring" he slightly smiled.

"we'll be fine line" she whispered.

"we'll be alright" he responded.

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐒 ─── steven conklinWhere stories live. Discover now