You know when I first thought that life was going great, it was just the beginning of the worst to happen. I don't think anything will help to keep me okay. To keep me from the verge of tears and all the screaming and yelling.
Tomorrow is my mothers surgery. I'm pretty proud of her for taking a step towards what she wants to do. But sometimes I feel so guilty of the pain I've put her through, but all the pain I've done only comes back to me. All the voices in my head telling me over and over again chanting to be let free, for my voice of reason to be let free, but I just can't accept the fact that once it does, will they see me as the person I was before?
Or the scared little girl inside begging to be set free from all the suffering and pain they've inflicted on me? I don't know and I don't care because in the end I'll only have myself.
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flashback:
"you know I love you right." "yes." "just because I pay more attention to your brother doesn't mean I didn't forget about you." "I know." "I love you" " I love you too."
"OW he's pulling my hair!!" *ignores* "stop, let go!" *ignores* "UGH let go." *finally sets myself free* "I'm going to my room." *finally answers* "go play with your brother."
"You always get what you want, and you want more?" "you don't deserve anything." "you don't work hard for things you want" "if you want something then work for it"
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sick. I'm tired of showing my worth and that I'm good for something because all I was ever good at was being the daughter they need to babysit the younger sibling. I'm always used to it. Never appreciated for. My mothers always mad, and my dad is always too caring with my brother. And me? I'm here writing what I've been dying to say since I've been feeling like this again. Worthless.
YOU ARE READING
Dear Diary
Short StoryPart Two. There's times where we might find ourselves in the deeps of our depression. But I know somewhere deep inside that genuine soul of mines I too can find happiness. And I owe that to myself. Sincerely, Bri.
